I live in Texas, but my biggest fear is that my obituary might say this:

I mean, just the thought of that keeps me up at night.  First, when I die, I want to be real sick, real old, or doing something worth dying for.  I would prefer for my butt to stay out of the equation.  Second of all, if my butt gets so big that it’s a clear target from half a mile away, just shoot me from the front anyway.  Be polite about it.

The story goes like this:

The homeowner was struck by a bullet in his behind. Sedgwick County Officers said it came from across a farm field behind his backyard. Five men ages 18-20 were shooting several rounds from the other side of the field. They were aiming at a dead stump with no back stop.

His injuries are not serious.  His embarrassment, however, is.

Thanks to Brian for the heads up.

Oh Lord, they now have a mid day report at GOPUSA because we liberals are just so damn intent on destroying America.

GOPUSA caught my eye several years ago when they were called Talon News and had Jeff Gannon working for them as a “reporter.”  After the big news broke about Gannon, they changed their name to GOPUSA but kept the same owners and staff.  The owner, Bobby Elberle, once ran for chair of the Texas Republican Party and actually cried when he lost by a very slim margin.

Noon’s headlines today.

They are all a titter that Democrats set up a voter registration table because it’s “disgusting.”

Missouri Republican Party Executive Director Matt Wills denounced voter registration efforts amid continued protests in Ferguson, calling it “disgusting.”

“If that’s not fanning the political flames, I don’t know what is,” Wills told Breitbart News, a conservative website, Monday.

He also called the actions “completely inappropriate.”

Oh yeah, voter registration fans the flames of racial injustice but a city being 67% African American with no African American elected officials is what calms the flames of racial injustice.  The worst thing happening in Ferguson right now is voter registration, dammit.

In reply —

Roy Temple, Missouri Democratic Party chairman, also used Twitter to disagree with Wills.

“There’s much in Ferguson to be outraged about,” Temple tweeted. “Folks peacefully registering to vote is not one of them.”

Ya think?

Just in case you haven’t heard, being indicted for a felony means that Rick Perry can’t carry a weapon or buy ammo, so all those coyotes just begging to be shot on Austin’s jogging trails are just going to have to wait.

“It shall be unlawful for any person to sell or otherwise dispose of any firearm or ammunition to any person knowing or having reasonable cause to believe that such person (1) is under indictment for, or has been convicted in any court of a crime punishable by imprisonment for a term exceeding one year.”

And our crazy friends over at GOPUSA headlined the horrors of Rick.

Dude, liberals are taking it just fine, and by just fine I mean snort-laughing at Perry and his O. J.-style legal  “team” whose strategy seems to be “If Rosemary got lit, you must acquit.”

And the Texas Democratic Party has issued 20 Questions that Perry’s Lawyers Don’t Want to Answer.

Thanks to John for the graphic and Luis for the heads up.

Duvall County, Texas, ain’t got nothing on Massachusettes.

During the GOP primary for a state house seat, there was some massive voter fraud.  Jack Villamaino voted Democrats in the GOP primary.

Earlier this week, Villamaino pleaded guilty to felony charges of stealing ballots and changing the party affiliation of 280 Democrats during his campaign for state representative. A judge sentenced him to a year in jail, only four months of which he’ll be forced to serve behind bars.

He changed the party affiliation of Democrats and voted them illegally by absentee in the damn Republican primary.

But, that doesn’t count as voter fraud because a Republican did it.

Thanks to Dustin for the heads up.

He’s like Clark Kent, once he puts the glasses on, no one will know he’s the same guy as Superman.

Smugmug.

The following letter is from Glen Maxey.  Some of you got it this afternoon and we raised $300 in the first hour.

Dear Beauty Salon Patrons,

Remember me? The old guy who raised money for new technology for the Texas Democratic Party?

I sorta think of you as a part of the rescue squad. When we wanted to build online tools, you guys stepped up to the plate and raised over $8500 to do so. I threatened to dance nekkid on a table if you’d donate. Many of you did. Others donated to keep me from dancing nekkid on a table.

This time, I’m hell bent on helping grandma and grandpa in rural Texas get a ballot.

Republicans have put up all kinds of ID barriers. Folks have to use a computer to vote. Some of them don’t trust the machines and want a paper ballot. Then there are the lines and no public transporation to get the the polls. There’s an answer to their challenges: a ballot by mail! It’s a paper ballot. You don’t need a driver’s license to vote. You don’t have to stand in line. And you don’t have to have your ornery no-good kid drive you to the polls.

Adopt a voter and send them an application for a mail ballot!!! For just .38 cents we’ll send them one Hell, adopt a whole county.

Somewhere in Texas there are Democratic seniors who don’t have an ID or are too frail to go to the polls. Texas Democratic Party will mail them an application to vote if you help us by adopting a county. Donate here at the link below to help.

https://secure.actblue.com/contribute/page/vbm

Mail checks made out to Texas Democratic Party, Attn: Glen Maxey, 4808 E Ben White Blvd Ste 104, Austin TX 78741

You can keep reading if I haven’t convinced you. If I have, just go back a couple of lines and donate.

Senior voters are an important part of the Democratic legacy, across our nation and here at home in Texas. They help us elect Democrats on every level statewide, from the courthouse to the state house. We plan to continue our proud tradition of standing with senior voters on the issues that matter most to them – including the right to vote.

Now, it’s easier than ever for seniors to vote. Under a new state law, disabled Texans and voters who are 65 + can apply to vote by mail. Once you apply to vote by mail your ballot will be mailed to you for every election: primaries, run offs, and of course the general election.

Voting by mail is easy and convenient. It allows voters to take their time and mark their ballots without the hassle of electronic voting machines. It also allows those who are who are disenfranchised by the onerous voter ID laws to cast a ballot.

There are close to 600,000 Democratic seniors who are eligible to vote by mail and its up to us to sign them up. This summer we need to teach them about the program and have them fill out their applications.

Any amount you give will go directly toward putting applications into the hands of a senior citizen or disabled Texan.

The earlier an application is received, the earlier a ballot will be mailed out, so time is of the essence!

Democratically yours,

Glen Maxey

Here’s a list of where I’m still trying to find funds. Any amount helps.

You might want to send some money so I can send applications to Smith County. It would be like a love letter to Louie Gohmert.

Thank you, Guys!

The Nancy and Sluggo of Progressive Politics.