But Straight People Would Never Do This
Gay people must be very different in Georgia than they are everywhere else in the world.
Being gay in Georgia must be a genetic condition that also makes you likely to cause straight people to lie to the state and cheat.
According the Republican Party Chairman in Georgia, Sue Everhart, if you allow gay couples to marry, then straight couple will pretend to be gay so that they can pretend to get married to get marriage benefits. Seriously.
Look, this is like trying to explain Chinese algebra in French to people who speak Spanish. I’ll just let Ms. Everhart try.
“You may be as straight as an arrow, and you may have a friend that is as straight as an arrow,” Everhart said. “Say you had a great job with the government where you had this wonderful health plan. I mean, what would prohibit you from saying that you’re gay, and y’all get married and still live as separate, but you get all the benefits?
Ms. Everhart doesn’t expand on what would keep that from happening between two straight people right now. Maybe gay people have mind control over straight people in Georgia. I dunno. I mean, you gotta admit, it’s Georgia so it wouldn’t take much.
Ms. Everhart also lacks basic biology.
“Lord, I’m going to get in trouble over this, but it is not natural for two women or two men to be married,” Everhart said. “If it was natural, they would have the equipment to have a sexual relationship.”
I’m gonna venture out there and suggest that Ms. Everhart doesn’t know much about hoochy-koochy.
Ms. Everhart cautions that she does not hate the gays. No, siree. She doesn’t not. But, she is a cautious woman:
“I’m not saying that we ostracize them or anything like that. I’m just saying I’m against marriage because once you get the gay marriage you get everything else.”
Like a pony? You mean a pony? That’s very cool.
Personally, I’ve always wanted everything else.
Thanks to Bob for the heads up.
Thanks – I have always wanted an example of the word “airhead”. I think you have provided it
1And I thought Texas had the corner on the wild-ass bullshit market; it now seems that it’s Georgia. What’s Ralph Reed gonna do about this as a reason to matty?
2Ms. Everhart has not only lived a very sheltered life, she must have found a place without windows as well.
3There’s just no end to the stupid, is there?
And yes, I’d like some Everything Else too, especially if ponies are involved.
It reminds me of the gay man who said that he didn’t understand this term “homosexual agenda.” He thought it was some kind of date book you got when you came out. “Lunch on Tuesday? Let me check my Homosexual Agenda….”
4I have a friend who told me about this movie she needs to see.
5“***I’m just saying I’m against marriage*** because once you get the gay marriage you get everything else”
she’s against marriage?
6Well…………..I’m gay and not married, but, can I still have everythng else? It’s always perplexing to me why straight people are always sooooooooooooo concerned about the sexx lives of gay people. Are they just jealous, or what?
7Makes no sense. I couldn’t care less what straight people do. Not my business.
scottybeamer, I’m with you. Some people, when gays are mentioned, squirm and say, “I just don’t want to think about what they do!” Obvious reply from anyone: “I don’t want to think about what YOU do either. And why do you spend time thinking about it? I don’t feel the need.”
8@san fraser: Personally, I think she is the prime candidate to become the ultimate definition of DumbAss.
9Oh Crap! Sorry Momma- hope ya didn’t read that.
10I think she watched ‘I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry’ and thought it was a morality tale. While such a situation could possibly happen if two men or two women wanted to live in a real-life sitcom pretending to be gay for hilarious hijinks, the same argument could be made for any man and woman deciding to live together and pretend to be married.
11As Ron White is fond of saying, “You can’t fix stupid”
12Mal, you beat me to the mention of “Chuck and Larry”. Of course, the true moral to that story was that we should have single payer healthcare so no American has to worry about running some sort of scam to get necessary medical coverage.
13I would personally trade one Georgia GOP for two Texan GOPs, but it just wouldn’t be a fair trade, let alone morally right.
14Wait, this is the Georgia Republican Party Chairwoman? Explains so much.
15Bobby Jindhall, you are fighting a losing battle.
She needs to get out more often.
16Ponies? We’re getting ponies? Here’s hopin’ that after things get set right and we all get some Everything Else, we’ll be havin some Super Happy Sparkle Rainbow Time with our ponies!
17Bless her heart. I sure hope she never teaches science. Or government.
18What a Georgia peach she is. Beyond the ripened stage.
19Or health class.
20Um, from the sheltered life department, what IS this “everything else” that she refers to in her babbling?
21She’s skipped right over the fact that when a man and a woman get married, they already get all the benefits she doesn’t want gay people to get. And there are straight couples in common law marriages that claim benefits. And furthermore…when gay people get married, they don’t live “as separate.”
As for her comments on sex…holy leapfroggin’ wingnuts, lady, what business is it of yours whether and how they do it? If they want to get married they figured it out. If they don’t do it, so what? If they do something you never heard of, so what? (Grumpy old lady thinks your mama didn’t teach you right, Sue, or you’d know Southern Ladyhood does not include (public) speculation on How Thy Neighbors Do It. Bless your little pea-pickin’ heart, you need someone to explain that being a Southern Lady is more than gettin’ your hair frosted and pouffed every week and remembering to put your pearls on before you take the trash out.)
22Idiot female from Georgia apparently DOES NOT realize that “everything else” is what gay marriage is about – Yeah, EVERYTHING ELSE MEANS EQUAL RIGHTS~FOR EVERYONE, my head hurts~
23