UPDATED: Trump Renounces the GOP – Will Give Away Fortune
UPDATED: This explosive story is breaking on every network: About 30 minutes ago, Donald Trump renounced his affiliation with the Republican Party, saying he’s going to switch to the Democratic and form a political alliance with Chuck Schumer and Nancy Pelosi. He also announced that he’s introducing legislation on Monday to expand Medicare to everyone in the US, including undocumented immigrants. He will also donate his entire fortune, including real estate interests, to Medicaid. In making this announcement, Trump said:
“When I awoke this morning I was hit with the revelation that I’ve been spending far too much time on Twitter and have not been doing my job since being inaugurated. From now on, I will work 24/7 to get healthcare for all, to protect the climate, and to stop Russians from interfering with our elections and government. To prove my commitment, I’m giving all of my worldly goods to Medicaid to help assure its solvency. Further, I’m requiring all of my billionaire cabinet members to also give their fortunes to Medicaid. Failure to do so will disqualify them from membership in the cabinet.”
This shocking story is still developing today, April 1, 2017.
UPDATE: In a follow up announcement, Trump revealed that Bill and Hillary Clinton have agreed to distribute all of Trump’s fortune through the Clinton Foundation.
APRIL FOOLS!!!!!
1This actual footage of the Titanic shortly before contact with iceberg with the transcript of Titanic’s Captain’s orders. This is rilly real.
http://www.alaskacommons.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/03/Titanic.jpg
Wolf, wolf.
2That is the best April fools joke I have ever seen! Kudos Juanita!
3If we could get Breitbart to publish this as news, Trumpski might just do it….
4ROFLMAO!
54/1! 4/1! 4/1!!!
6By some fluke of the calendar, April Fool’s Day fell on November 8, 2016.
7No joke, El Jefe! When the honest “decent thing to do” becomes an April Fool’s joke, we are deep in Drumpf doo doo.
The media has some thing going with 100 days and counting. Do they know something that we don’t? Like maybe either Scalia or Putin jumping out of a cake yelling “just kidding” about the election of Donnie?
Dear goddess, no. Just no. Please do not let them be naked.
8You smooth talking devil. You have been waiting since November to write that
9Shouldn’t an April Fool joke be remotely believable?
10Don’t we wish.
11Marge Wood and Rhea, precisely yes, we wish and dream of the days before “believable” sank in a murky Gish gallop of ‘alternative’ facts.
Seriously, should I tweet the SkullAnusWrongway today: Donnie is cute and adorable, shall we club him like a baby seal?
Stand down, Secret Service. Donnie is deplorable, a douche and a dumba$$. But, I have no desire to make him a martyr. Frankly I don’t care whether he leaves the White House in chains on his way to prison or simply to return to Trump Land wherever. Um, minor correction on the “wherever” – not in my state, please.
12http://theimmoralminority.blogspot.com/2017/04/obama-officials-hand-carried-classified.html
Here is one that is imminently believable because it is not a joke.
(Since no one was in the mood for a Titanic joke)
13e platypus onion, as more information continues to emerge, more questions arise. Given the information he had it seems that Mitch McConnell may have committed treason, sedition and Logan Act violations.
For the record, EPO, your Titanic joke was puntastic! Quite likely the record for images and puns combined in one place. But to be sure, you do know that the damn boat sank, riiight? ;D
14“And monkeys might fly out of Trump’s butt.” (Wayne’s World)
15Yeah, April fool! And out there somewhere there are people who thoroughly believe it and are now lighting candles in front of a pix of Trump!
16Jane & PKM says: My lot in life is to spread humor so no good people, such as posters here, go crazy from the crazy. Rumour has it the Titanic went down, but since I haven’t seen it with me own eyes, I will reserve judgement.
17What’s really amazing about this is the fact that the first sentence in the “announcement” could actually have been real. Tweety COULD renounce the snacilbupeR members and become a Democrat. After all, he has switched parties before — whenever it was convenient.
And he could perceive it as convenient now. He might really believe switching could get that pesky Adam Schiff off his back. Because Tweety believes that lies don’t matter; crimes don’t matter; the integrity of the election doesn’t matter; the Constitution doesn’t matter; nothing really matters at all — except loyalty. So switching the group he swears loyalty to would mean [in his mind] that all would be forgiven.
I, for one, am glad he wouldn’t dare do it, though. No thank you, Tweety, stay over there. Way, WAY over there. Russia would be good. The farther away the better.
18Ahh, JJ, if only it weren’t a joke.
19Meanwhile, as the House of Nepotism moves forward to establish a monarchy filled with foreign oligarchs and local criminals, flying through the tornadoes and torpedoes of shiny objects is certainly a challenge.
Just a suggestion, but while we do our best to keep Congress honest, demand they do their job(s) and keep Donnie under relative restraint, we do have a couple of other options.
#’s 1 & 2 are demanding just how it was that no public service soup kitchen local level did not pick up a ladle or serve, Ivanka and Jared with absolutely no contributions national or international service suddenly have security clearances. Mickey Finn, oops, Flynn, may be both the shiny object and sacrificial lamb trampled to promote the two most insignificant groping pieces of protoplasm to ever stumble into American history.
But again, please. Can someone in the national security chain explain how those two insignificant lightweight bozos are sitting with Steve Bannon reading anything classified higher than back issues of Weekly Reader?
e platypus onion! My man!! Our man!!! It goes without saying that you are among the best of the best with comments in the WMDBS. As dumba$$ Donnie attacks left, right, center and cluster bombs/FUBARS Congress, your girl Senator Joni Ernst is receiving some credible cover from Senator John McCain. Please give us the dish from Iowa, e platypus onion. Regale us, sir. What up? Are John & Lindsey about to pass the baton to Joni?
20Further along in the weekend of fools, add Joe Donnelly (D-IN) no surprises to Joe Manchin (D-WV) and Heidi Heitkamp (D-ND) to form 3 morons ready to give up whatever dignity that they might have possessed at one time or another to vote to confirm Neil Gorsuck.
Without any room for doubt, Donnie does pick the deplorable. So yes, my preference would have been “none of the above” as to confirming any of Donnie’s picks. DeVos and Gorsuck are highly probable to be the worst of the deplorable. Betsy slid. So that leaves Neil as the line too far.
21Is the idiot chargeing the US gov. for green fees etc when he uses his own golf courses?
22