Awwwwesome!

June 22, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Okay, so apparently all good things come in threes.

Apparently, Texas does not have enough damn fools in the presidential race to form a triumvirate.

We have a guy making his second bid who thinks that a guy can take a gun into a church and accidentally murder nine people.  We have another guy who makes is so nuts that even his friends think he’s a little nuts.  What’s lacking?

Louie Gohmert.

That’s what.

First he says he will and then he says he won’t.

“Ted is a good friend and would be an outstanding President; however, I haven’t ruled out an exploratory committee myself,” Gohmert said in a statement emailed to The Hill from a spokeswoman.

Okay, guys, it’s up to us to get Louie in this race.  We’re not having near enough fun yet.

Urge Louie to run, dammit!  Texas deserves it.

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0 Comments to “Awwwwesome!”


  1. Wyatt Earl says:

    I’m buying Alcoa stock. The demand for tinfoil hats must be skyrocketing.

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  2. Oh, Louie, please, please, puh-leeze run! Texas isn’t nearly stoopid enough in America’s eyes. We need you to seal the deal.

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  3. Michele Bachmann would be the VP candidate that would make this so PERFECT!

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  4. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    It’s time for a joint venture between Emily’s List, the Democratic Party and Everlast Worldwide Inc. to empower women, raise funds for BLUE (not bluedog) candidates and create manufacturing jobs in the USA.

    Ah, the fund raising value of a heavy bag with Louie’s head painted on it; priceless. My only regret is that I didn’t ™ the gohmert punch and kick for donations to turning Texas blue.

    Writ Twits, is it too late?

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  5. Um. You’re saying Cruz has friends?

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  6. It is nearly impossible for me to dignify this with a response.

    That said, sure there remains plenty of room on the Teajadist clown train for Rep. Louie Gohmert. Plenty. Welcome aboard gray meat.

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  7. Yes, we need to buy stock in Alcoa and Orville-Reddenbacker. All we would need now is Steve King (or has he already thrown his pointy hat in the ring?)

    At this point, the repub clown car should be studied by the Large Hadron Collector. The Higgs-Boson has nothing on the physics-defying capabilities of it.

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  8. You know, I suddenly have this image:

    Get a bunch of balloons with the Republican candidates images on them. Then tack them to a backboard and play darts (like a carnival game), and under each balloon the disk saying “Sorry, you’re a loser.”

    That would make a great 4th of July type party game.

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  9. Marge Wood says:

    Star, you could market it! Get busy and get it trademarked or something. Or just make them ourselves. Now. Someone come up with a plausible (to Louie) message we can send to him (aDdress please??) encouraging him to run for President. We need a blah return address which can’t be found or whatever and include “polling results” about why Gohmert should run.

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  10. maryelle says:

    There are so many wackos already running, they can surely scoot over and make room for the terminally stupid Gohmert.

    Star, if you’re not able to draw their likenesses on the ballooons, just printing their names would suffice. Party on!

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  11. Fred Farklestone says:

    Here’s what one needs for the upcoming election season!

    http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/images/blbushbsprotection.htm

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  12. Hey, how about this for his logo: If Jeb Bush can have “Jeb!”, how about “Screwy Louie!” for our very own World’s Worst Congressman? Or, if you’re feeling naughty, you could just happen to accidentally leave out the “y.”
    (Bad dog! Bad dog! I’m so ashamed of myself.)

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  13. e platypus onion says:

    Wingnuts need a farmer to run so there would be at least one wingnut candidate outstanding in his field.

    Send them all to iowa sinator Ivana Kuturnutzov’s clip joint for a little trim under Johnsonville. They’re nuts. If you can’t beat ’em,eat ’em.

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  14. But it won’t be complete until Sarah throws her hat in the ring. That would be a thing of beauty to get all of them in there.

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  15. Ted should just select Louie for VP. Then we would not have to give up two out of the three if Ted made it to the top of the GOP ticket.

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  16. loo-i, loo-i, ooohhh !

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  17. Gohmert? isn’t that the sound you make when you have to cough up a loogie?

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  18. @frank
    Awesome thought. Brother Louie Hot Chock-o-lot!
    “Louie was whiter than white”
    “I don’t want no honky in my family”
    And I don’t want THAT honky in the Casablanca.

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  19. His campaign song should be “Louie, Louie,” because nobody can figure out what it means either.

    How many GOP candidates are there now? Are we up to “19 and Counting” territory?

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  20. Frank McCormick says:

    The three stooges: Louis, Rick and Ted! (Photoshop left as an exercise to the reader)

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  21. Pancho Sanza says:

    Dear Judge Congressman My Moral Superior Mr. Louie Gohmert,

    We need your help to defeat Hillary. Only by entering the race yourself can you make mental midgets like Donald Trump, Rick Perry, and Mike Huckleballs seem intelligent enough to be worthy of being President of the USA.

    Pleadingly,
    Pancho Sanza

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  22. Linda Phipps says:

    Absolutely: let’s get the Kochs and the idiots to invest even more of their money in a lost cause. I love it when that happens.

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  23. e platypus onion says:

    Start a draft Louie petition and see how long it takes wingnuts to accuse Obama of overreaching presidential powers to reinstate the draft.

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  24. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Run, Louie, run!

    If only we could convince Louie, pRick and Daffy Cruz, Jr. to run ahead of the helicopters hunting wild pigs. Or, at a minimum join Darth Cheney in ‘sport’ hunting.

    Per Alfredo’s numbers, the Koch-roaches have been able to maintain Loopy Louie with minimal $5000 donations. It’s so tempting to test what hoop I could send Louie through with a mere 10K donation.

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  25. Corinne Sabo says:

    I can see the bumper sticker now: Lunatic Louie for President

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  26. Marge Wood says:

    Pancho, great letter!

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  27. UmptyDump says:

    A couple reasons Louie should run:

    1. Last week the bizarro speech of the week came from Donald Trump. No new Klowns appear to be scheduled this week, so it might as well be Louie. Let’s keep the laughs coming.

    2. It’s an outside shot, but maybe the hoots of derision that Louie earns on the national stage will finally be sufficient embarrassment for First District voters to send him packing when he comes up for reelection.

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