You need to meet Larry Kilgore.  Larry officially and legally changed his middle name to SECEDE so he could run for governor on the Republican ticket as Larry SECEDE Kilgore.

A plan so crazy it just might work.

I know you’re gonna think I’m making this stuff up but I am not.

Larry believes in the Bible.  His Bible says that homosexuals should be put to death.  But, there’s where the problems comes in –  he needs homosexual votes to win, so he’s willing to forgive them momentarily to get elected.  He explains it better than I can.

“I am a Christian, and I have lots of Christian beliefs. However, I am trying to build a coalition of all different types of people. I look at the lesbians and the homosexual folks and I say, ‘Hey, D.C. is stealing my money just like they’re stealing your money.’ After we get our freedom, then we can decide all that stuff — hopefully at a county level. Right now, lesbians and homosexuals and Christians may have differences with each other, but we’ve got a bigger enemy.”

Well hell yeah.  Better to let Larry kill you than to let Washington steal your money.  And I know homosexuals will feel so much better knowing they are being killed by county government rather than state government.  I mean, that right there is something worth fighting for.

But before you straight people get too cocky, Larry has some plans for you, too.

Asked what the punishment for homosexuality should be, Kilgore said, “According to the Bible, it should be execution, if anyone participates in that activity.” But he said the same for adulterers and women who have abortions.

I think he’s going for the group rate on executions.