The Republican Party doesn’t feel that they’ve spent enough time in women’s vaginas, so now comes some startling new information on the exact same scientific level as witch dunking.

Rep. Todd Akin, the Republican nominee for Senate in Missouri who is running against Sen. Claire McCaskill, justified his opposition to abortion rights even in case of rape with a claim that victims of “legitimate rape” have unnamed biological defenses that prevent pregnancy.

Republican Rep. Todd Akin. Never been raped.

I checked available records, and while I will freely admit that not all criminal records can be obtained online, but the best I can tell, Rep. Todd Akin has never been raped.  I could be wrong through, because he seems to knows just a tad too much about the secret functions of female anatomy. And he certainly is a little floozy-looking himself.

This bit of information could also be used in trials.  If a woman gets pregnant from the so-called rape, then she hasn’t been legitimately raped, you know, as opposed to illegitimately raped.

Just in case there were eyewitnesses and the rapist confesses and Akin’s biochemistry theory doesn’t work, then he has a Plan B.

Akin said that even in the worst-case scenario — when the supposed natural protections against unwanted pregnancy fail — abortion should still not be a legal option for the rape victim.

Because Todd Akin loves your uterus.

Thanks to Deb for the heads up.