And Ted Will Be in the Closet
So you know how when a snowball starts small and then builds bigger and bigger as it rolls until it finally hits something and explodes with snow and crap flying everywhere?
Well, I don’t know anything about that because I haven’t seen snow since 1973, but that’s what I see on teevee so I suspect there’s some truth to it. And, more importantly, I have watched Ted Cruz and that out-of-control snowball has started an avalanche so I am kind of an expert of these things for a girl who lives in flip flops.
So, Ted’s latest attempt at ball building is to say something tacky about President Obama that has never been said before. That’s harder than it first appears to be because they’ve pretty much used every insult in the English language, and a few in moon-man talk, too.
Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) on Friday said that President Barack Obama was trying to violate all of the Bill of Rights and would “start quartering soldiers in people’s homes soon.”
Speaking to the Values Voter Summit in Washington, D.C., Cruz told the audience that the country was facing “extraordinary times.”
“You look at our Constitution, you look at our Bill of Rights, this is an administration that seems bound and determined to violate every single one of our Bill or Rights,” he explained.
Yeah, Ted is real nervous about the Third Amendment, which prohibits the quartering of soldiers in citizen’s homes, because he thinks President Obama has a bucket list to violate every Bill of Rights.
I think Ted is missing the point. If you shut down the government and destroy the economy, where the hell else can we put our soldiers?
Now we get to the part where Snowball Ted hits the brick wall.
Winning this has been the Kiss of Death in the past. And that may be why a group of Democrats got together and spent $90 to send a fruit basket to Ted Cruz.
“Dear Ted,” said the card to Texas Sen. Ted Cruz on the fruit and snack basket from 1-800-FLOWERS sent by Brad Woodhouse, president of Americans United for Change and the former Democratic Party communications director. “A Texas sized thank you!! Thanks to you, Obamacare is more popular and the GOP is less so. Keep up the Good Work!! Yours, Americans United for Change.”
So, when the Ted Cruz snowball does explode, there’s gonna be 20, 30 feet of snow all over Texas.
Thanks to everybody for the heads up.
I don’t think that’s gonna be “snow” that splatters all over everything. It’ll be something real dirty and smelly instead.
“So, when the Ted Cruz
1snowballsh!tball does explode, there’s gonna be 20, 30 feet of snow all over Texas.”Guess the TX hardware stores will have to stock up on snow shovels!! Snow blowers!! Maybe even snow shoes and winter coats … it gets cold when it snows!!
2So, 20, 30 feet, yes. But it won’t be snow.
3Would somebody please pass me some popcorn?
4Just a heads up on those flowers – they need to pick another flower shop. I am pretty sure that 1-800-FLOWERS is a big supporter of Limbaugh.
5Same old Rethuglican trick: Prevent the government from doing its job, then say the government is incompetent.
This from the people who both 1. Want to run the government “like a business”, and 2. Have spent far more time in government than the private sector.
6Speaking of moon-man talk, if only Gidney and Cloyd would show up and give Cuban Ted a good long term blast from the Scrooch Gun.
7Another time, another place and an opportunity to see that jaw – up close and personal.
8Does that mean soldiers will be able to live with their families?
9So do I get a sailor? Tell me I get a sailor.
10Wait, make that a fighter pilot.
11As far as most women are concerned, Cruz and the Repugs have violated most of the rights of women, especially those enumerated in the first and ninth amendments.
12Maybe I’m wrong and it’s just the angle, but it looks as if the Cruz nose is getting longer. Based upon the number of lies he tells, it should be lower than his chin-neck soon.
13Vickie–
14I think you want a sailor, preferably one who can ride waves–those fly boys are quick and pretty mean…just from my own life experiences!
But really, you guys, if Teddy is going to put 20-30 feet of snow all over Texas, then that would be the answer to Govenor Goodhair’s drought prayers from a while back…althought that puts them in direct competition with each others “voices” of God, telling them to run for Presidency of our fair land. I agree that it most likely won’t be snow, but with the fertilizer plant blowing up (truly sorry for the people in West, Texas) the state being covered with Cruz BS seems about right…sigh
We’re gonna miss him when he’s gone.
I can hardly wait!
15We can’t miss him ’til he’s gone. His fifteen minutes are way over and it’s time for his farewell tour.
16That picture of Cruz looks powerfully to me like he done spent his night praying and God didn’t give him the answer he wanted. Or maybe he and his banker wife are planning to house a whole wad of soldiers. Or sailors. Or Marines. I bet they can do all their own laundry too. Hey, I can imagine.
17Compare pix of Tedster with Mussolini. Prepare for chicken skin. They are that similar.
18Ralph & Ellen: “How can I say I miss you when I can’t get you to leave…?” (song)
19I think Teddy & his dad should move back to Cuba. When Fidel kicks the bucket, they can take over. Come on JJ. No snow in Texas? I remember watching a Cowboys-Packers game years ago on TV. I think it was in Dallas. You could’nt even see the field it was snowing so hard.
20I knew snowballs. Snowballs were my friends. Sin nutter Cruz-your’re no snowball.
21Elise-see the quandary South dakota’s lame rethuglicans are in. Their one and only rwnj congressweasellette-Kristi Noem-voted to keep farm subsidies for herself while cutting foodstamps for fellow Dakotans. She and Sen Thune don’t want Obama’s gov’t intrusion in their state,they just had a record blizzard and ranchers lost over 100,000 head of cattle and because of rwnj trashing the farm bill,farmers and ranchers can’t get federal help. Now the nutters are begging Washington for help. If there weren’t a lot of decent people being hurt,I’d like Obama to tell them to go to hell. Of course he is too decent a human being for which the nutters will attack him about when they get their funds.
22@e platypus–I saw that and thought the same thing–and that we needed to get the last of the USDA beef in the house because of the food quality having gone away…I’m immune suppressed and can’t be getting sick from food…we like beef and the price is going to really go up! Poor SD decent folk–it’s so tough there–I was there visiting family in January and my sister-in-law came in from feeding the chickens–wrapped in head to toe neoprene because it was with wind chill -35 degrees and said that she didn’t have to worry about that anymore because the chickens were frozen solid…tough place to make a living!
23Reminds me that I want to find a good meat locker, the kind that ranchers use when they butcher a calf or a hog and the locker plant processes the meat and you keep it in a big drawer and pick up a few packages whenever you drive by. Oh, and first I need to find someone who is a decent person who raises cattle and other meat on legs and would sell me some. I am not kidding. I used to could keep a whole hog in my refrigerator–bought a hog at a time when FFA kids sold their hogs. Unfortunately that refrigerator got old and died.
24Not gonna be a show…. it will be the sign that hell has frozen over.
25Ted Cruz looks like a child molester. There’s just something unhealthy looking about his skin — like evil hides just underneath. I’d hate to be pinned down by him he’s so frightful looking. Ugh. *shivers and chills and a tickly back-of-the-neck*
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