Okay, Okay, It’s An Alien Invasion
So, Majorie Taylor Greene’s furry white balloon coat scared everybody so much that I’ll be damned, something got itself shot down over Alaska yesterday.
We have no idea what it was, leaving the tantalizing possibility that it was her coat.
“We’re calling this an object because that’s the best description we have right now,” Kirby said. “We don’t know who owns it – whether it’s state-owned or corporate-owned or privately-owned, we just don’t know.”
Object? That’s the best you can do? Thingy, doohickey, whatchamacallit, whatnot, somebody’s coat, unknown Toyota part …? I mean, object is the damn best that about $20 trillion can buy the military?
Are you telling me that it could be a Boy Scout project gone haywire?
A US official said the military waited to shoot the object down during daylight hours to make it easier for the pilots to spot it. Ryder said the mission was “supported with aerial assets from the Alaska Air National Guard.”
Wait a minute, wait just a damn minute. Are you telling telling me that an F22, which cost like a billion dollars, doesn’t have radar or sonar or what the hell, night vision goggles? We can only fight invasion during the daytime? Look, for a billion dollars, I expect an F22 to be able to sniff-out the damn thing. They can bring along a beagle or something?
Let’s make this crazier …
The Alaska National Guard and units under US Northern Command, along with HC-130 Hercules, HH-60 Pave Hawk, and CH-47 Chinook are all participating in the effort to recover the object, Ryder said.
I guess we should be thrilled they didn’t bump into each other. Hell, throw in some beads and some boobies, and it would have looked like Mardi Gras up there.
Hell, they just told us that this object wasn’t purposely guided. I mean, it’s just a sitting target. I’ve seen my Aunt Thelma hit a rattlesnake from 30 yards away and that damn thing was moving. They need my Aunt Thelma. I know she could even do it in the dark by listening to the rattle. When I told her the object was the size of a small car, she was willing to bet the Air Force that she could take it out from a crop duster. While flying the damn duster.
Ryder said on Friday that recovery teams have “mapped the debris field” and are “in the process of searching for and identifying debris on the ocean floor.”
“While I won’t go into specifics due to classification reasons,” Ryder said, “I can say that we have located a significant amount of debris so far that will prove helpful to our further understanding of this balloon and its surveillance capabilities.”
I am not real sure I want these guys messing around on the ocean floor. They are liable to pull the plug down there or something.
The “object” is obviously the Tesla Roadster which Elon Musk fired off into space in 2018. Its autonavigation system is attempting to find a recharging station . . .
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elon_Musk%27s_Tesla_Roadster
1Did it ever occur to anyone that of course they know “what” the thing is but they just don’t want to tell us?
2No, wait! It wasn’t the Tesla Roadster at all!
The supersecret military operation slipped me a copy of a photo taken by the F22:
https://tinyurl.com/2p83xjw7
3Why use missiles? Why not send up an F16 with guns?
4The Main Drain Spongebob episode.
5https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H0CjBoIr3Rw
Maybe the Martian are toying with us. Another ufo was shot down by another f22 over the Canadian Yukon today. JJ, tell your Aunt Thelma to be on alert. They’re probably headed to Texas next. Maybe Musk is really a Martian and he’s testing his new self driving space Tesla.
6It was George Santos’ lunch falling back to Earth after it got away from him during his space walk. It looked big on radar because everything was wrapped in tin foil
7I’m scared to ever meet your Aunt Thelma! ‘Course lotsa you Texas women are tough and great shots, but hot damn!
8Makes ya wonder doesn’t it, tough, smart women like Thelma and Miss Anne and the Repugnants find men like Cruz, Gohmert and y’all’s governor and that other guy, currently under indictment.
IDK, but aren’t satellites a more efficient way to gather intelligence? If a balloon is so easy to shoot down, why would the Chinese even use one?
9ya gotta have some mass,of metal for most missles to work,ballons dont, the air to air missle needs to be timed for this encounter over finding a mass of metal,or the jet releasing it could be the target if the intended ballon,isnt recognized. ya, it was more than a press the button matter. and the CIA want all of it to see how much better we can make ours..
10best wishes..
@jack – Apparently these missiles can be programmed to target differences in reflected light. That’s how they’re hitting them.
11If it’s another balloon at 60,000′ above sea level, does Thelma really want to shoot at it? Can Thelma hit a car-sized object
12from two miles below? The F-22’s service ceiling is about 50,000′. Does she really want to? Would she maybe like to emulate test pilot Tom Attridge, who shot himself down while flying an F-11F Tiger? Or test pilot Peter Purvis, who did
something similar while flying an F-14?
Another high altitude balloon shot down over Lake Huron today. US needs to start using their spy satellites to see where they’re coming from. Obviously riding the high level wind currents shouldn’t be too hard to figure out. Somebody is playing with us.
13And why would any alien in its right mind want to come here?
14