Free Advice
I may have told you that Alex Jones had great difficulty finding a good lawyer and keeping them. He had either 12 or 14 lawyers, one at a time and depending on who’s counting, over the course of the trials and two more for the bankruptcy court. They have managed to win exactly zero motion hearings or even objections during hearings and or trials. And there’s still one trial in Connecticut and three more in Texas pending.
This morning I read that TFG’s biggest problem is getting a qualified a lawyer who knows his or her business in a courtroom. It seems that no lawyer wants his case.
So, here’s my advice. If you make fun of parents who lost their first graders to a crazed gunman or you steal nuclear secrets, you are on your damn own. So, don’t do that. Also, it does not help if you are well known for lying all the time.
No competent lawyer will handle The Orange Blivet’s cases and no competent lawyer will work for anyone with a proven history of stiffing his lawyers.
1Gee, a guy whose reputation is for 1) not listening to sound legal advice; and, 2) not paying for said advice is having trouble finding competent legal help for the most serious trouble he’s ever been in. I can’t stop laughing!
I know what he should do: hire Alex Jones’ lawyer before he gets disbarred. He’ll do it—cheaply, too. We’d all pay good money to watch that fool in action again.
2Consider the case of the former pretender’s lawyers: Cippillone and Philbin, who were charged with the transfer of documents to the national Archives during the transition. They now have to answer for The Espionage Screw-up, even though they eventually resigned and were replaced by someone else who is also mired in the felonies.
3The fact that one of Dump’s lawyers signed a form declaring that all of the stolen government documents had been returned from Mar a Lardo when more were discovered doesn’t bode well for that attorney. Either he lied or Dump did, (3 guesses) but no lawyer wants a client who constantly lies and gets him into deep doo doo. Who needs it!
I can always tell when a defense attorney acquaintance of mine is defending a horrible or uncooperative client who thinks they know better. She talks about going back to art school.
Trump must have made a whole lot of lawyers rethink their vocation.
4I love this quote from Tom Blanton, director of the independent, non-governmental National Security Archive at George Washington University:
“The counsel’s office was often working at cross-purposes with the way President Trump treated records,” Blanton said. “To Trump, the White House was another casino he had bought. This one was just on Pennsylvania Avenue.”
5There’s also the part about getting paid – the lawyers I know want to be paid for their work. TFG is looking iffy on the payment side!
6Suppose Giuliani would be available if he wasn’t in so much trouble himself.
As for Mr Jones he continues to get beat in court:
https://www.dailykos.com/story/2022/8/16/2116983/-Judge-squashes-Alex-Jones-attempt-to-delay-his-day-of-reckoning-
7Wait till Trump finds out he can have a lawyer free free FREE! They’re called “public defenders.”
8The Reynal Scale of Attorney Incompetence
1 Reynal: Chews gum in court
2 Reynals: Represents a client who will probably never pay
3 Reynals: Asks for eight dollar in damages
4 Reynals: Forces a jury to listen to Alex Jones, both live and on video
5 Reynals: Quotes Martin Niemoller — implying that the plaintiffs are Nazis
6 Reynals: Loses defamation case by default after refusing to provide documents and testimony
7 Reynals: Flips off opposing attorney on national television
8 Reynals: Can’t keep his client from publicly mocking the judge
9 Reynals: Sends opposing attorney evidence to convict his client of perjury
10 Reynals: Andino Reynal
9Maybe TFG should cut Giuliani in for a % of that Saudi/LIV golf oil money??
10Who’s picking up the tab? Saw last week that the RNC told TFG when he announces he will run for POTUS they will no longer pay his legal fees. But there must be multiple legal fees. Does anybody have a breakdown of who is paying which?
11According to Andy Borowitz, theDOJ said that they’d love to see Alex Jones’ lawyers working for Trump.
12Articles popped up the last few days about TFG complaining that the FBI took 3 of his passports from his safe. Three? Of how many? Why would he need that many passports? Is he planning to slink out of the country?
13The Constitution says we have the right to the best defense possible, but some things are indefensible.
14treehugger says:
“… 3 of his passports…”
As President we now know he gets to declassify documents, so probably can print up extra passports as well?
15For secret missions?
Undisclosed identities for admittance to undisclosed locations? One for John Barron, his call-in radio alter ego?
For usual circumstances,
“US citizens can legally possess two passports. Yes, you can have the normal 10-year passport plus a second, limited validity passport, normally valid for 4 years. Commonly referred to as “Duplicate Passports”, second passports offer the ability to travel internationally while processing a visa in the US or to visit countries who do not allow entry to passport holders with stamps from enemy countries.”
In Trump’s case: “Former President Donald Trump claimed on TruthSocial, his social media platform, that FBI agents “stole” three of his passports – one of which was expired – when they searched his Mar-a-Lago estate in Palm Beach, Florida, on Aug. 8.”
Off the top of my head, I cannot remember anything in the warrant that would justify FBI agents taking passports.
Then again, I can’t imagine why the President would be in New Jersey and have his two passports in Florida, either.
16And apparently now he’s “considering” releasing the surveillance footage of the FBI search.
17Don’t threaten me with a good time skippy.
And did anybody else notice this or is it just me. Several times when I’ve seen coverage of the story of the blitzkrieg raid on mar a Lago there’s a still shot used as background for graphics or whatnot. And in the shot are government agents with assault rifles, one of which is a young woman, giving the impression of a heavily armed team.
18But hears the kicker.
Unless I’m wrong, and I’m never wrong (for you Princess Bride fans) that young lady is wearing a shirt that says Secret Service.
Cry Baby cannot get any lawyers because they know they will NOT get paid .
19I like the firm whose lawyers wouldn’t meet with The Don one-on-one; they always met him in pairs so as to have a witness to substantiate what had told them.
20Perhaps Dewey Cheatem & Howe would represent TFG?
https://www.threestooges.com/tag/dewey-cheatem-and-howe/
21@Papa—-Or he could just go with the proctologist team of “Proba, Keister, and Wince” and eliminate the middle men.
22TexasTrailerTrash @22,
Are they an associated partnership of In.U.Endo?
23Maybe he should watch some afternoon TV commercials?
“Do you know Betty Blackwell?”
24https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YdgtZjulCtM
slipstream, you forgot “allowed client to insult jury” (“they don’t know what planet they’re on”). I’m no lawyer but this feels like a bad move.
25Papa@23—No, but they may be associated with Dr. I.P. Freely.
26Then there is the rogue lawyer, Haywood Jabuzzoff and his chauffeur, Pikup Andropoff. Oh those Car Talk guys were so clever.
27Well, well! Both AJ and the Golden Gibbon are getting squeezed big time simultaneously. And they don’t like it!Karma knows where they live.
28maryelle, TexasTrailerParkTrash, Papa: since you brought it up, you might like the full, complete, authoratative list of Car Talk staff:
https://www.cartalk.com/content/staff-credits
Enjoy!
29The Surly Professor—Thanks! That really is an impressive list. I think I’d like to hire the French dog walker, Poupon Degrasse, myself.
30