Gossip On The Way To Truth

April 01, 2022 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Okay, y’all, if you toss Madison Cawthorn, Roger Stone, and Alex Jones into your Veg-A-Matic and turn it on HIGH, you get something that will make you snort giggle all weekend.

I know it’s April Fool’s Day but – damn – I’ll believe anything that even 2 out of 3 of those guys say.

https://twitter.com/MollyJongFast/status/1509727328716435459?t=YNSgbmSx2O-KldbMWVLAJw&s=01

Question: how does he know what happens at these orgies unless he’s been there?

By the way, the Sandy Hook parents’ lawsuit in Texas starts on April 25th in the county courthouse in Travis County. Jones made an insulting settlement offer to the parents. They rejected it. Loudly.

I hope your weekend is great.

 

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0 Comments to “Gossip On The Way To Truth”


  1. RepubAnon says:

    Looking forward to the trial and the swift decision that all Alex’s assets now belong to his victims.

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  2. Steve from Beaverton says:

    Love to see Alex Jones grovel!
    Your opening paragraph describing what you’d get if you threw these 3 into a veg-a-matic reminded me immediately of a SNL skit (believe it was with Steve Martin) where he threw 3 stinky bass in a blender and called it his “bass-o-matic.” Until now, I thought that was the most disgusting, smelly concoction possible. Yours is now in 1st place in my book. Only thing worse (or better) would be to top it off with fled texas cruz.
    And yes, happy April fools day all. I’m still imagining those 3 fools (plus cruz) in your veg-a-matic!

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  3. Grandma Ada says:

    Eeeew! I need to go wash out my . . . everything! That man shouldn’t be anywhere but court and then to his bank for a great big wad of money for the Sandy Hook families!

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  4. Steve from Beaverton says:

    Might have been Chevy Chase now that I think about it.

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  5. Jane & PKM says:

    The counter to Jone’s insulting settlement offer should be: Justice delayed is justice denied, but since you did offer, we’ll take that $120,000 for every day since you first opened your mouth and until all of us are paid in full.

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  6. Steve from Beaverton says:

    Twice wrong, it was Dan Akroyd

    https://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/bassomatic/n8631

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  7. Steve, that was Dan Aykroyd.

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  8. Steve from Beaverton says:

    Sorry. Hope you can open this one. My first link wouldn’t open.
    https://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/snl40-bassomatic/2847141

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  9. Nick Carraway says:

    Reminds me more like the Simpsons episode where Homer created his own website. He just threw out about a hundred ridiculous conspiracy theories only to find one of them being right. My favorites were that Italian and Spanish were the same language and that bagels were “week old donuts”.

    The sports books around the country could make a fortune setting odds on which lawmakers were involved. Matt Gaetz is even money while TFG and GED Barbie are probably 2 to 1. Fled Cruz is 100,000 to 1 since I doubt that anyone on either side of the aisle wants any part of that anywhere in the same county as them.

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  10. Sandridge says:

    RepubAnon @1, Unless the courts have frozen them, Alexei Jonesov has probably been feverishly hiding his reputed ~$125Million in secret offshore and cryptocurrency accounts.

    .
    When the SpaceX BFR Starship [BigF’nRocket] gets ready for it’s first major expedition to Mars, there should a special passenger manifest consisting of these lowest criminal classmates like tRump, Jones, Cruz, Mitch, Clarence, MTG, LB, DeSatan, etc. Load ’em up, blast ’em off.
    Then one week out, somebody remembers that there was only eight days of oxygen provisioned. Oops…

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  11. Katherine says:

    I just want to know what self-respecting orgy hostess would invite Alex Jones?

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  12. Katherine @12,

    or MTG, Moscow Mitch, Hawley, Cruz, Gosar or Tuberville? Eewww!

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  13. slipstream says:

    O/T: Sorry to ruin your entire day, but Sarah Palin (she of the cajones) went ahead and filed to run for Alaska’s one and only seat in Congress.

    It’s a jungle primary. Anybody can enter and over 40 did, including (not kidding) Santa Claus from North Pole.

    The primary is June 11, which means that I (and every other Alaskan) are in for 70 days of pure screaming gibberish.

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  14. Steve from Beaverton says:

    It’s not like replacing Don Young can be any (much) worse. Sorry you have to go through this, Slipstream. Palin will fit right in with all the names mentioned from this article and comments. She actually inspired mtg and boebert. And others.

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  15. slipstream says:

    The final count is in: 51 candidates in the primary election for Alaska’s one and only seat in Congress.

    It’s perfect for Sarah Palin: only 4.3 miles from the US Capitol to the Nordstrom, Fashion Centre at Pentagon City.

    Gotta love the “re” in “Centre.”

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  16. Sandridge says:

    Here’s some good news for a change.
    While I’d rather see something like an aircraft carrier named after RBG, only President’s usually get the CVNs [there are naming exceptions].

    Navy to Name New Oiler After Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg:

    https://gcaptain.com/navy-to-name-new-oiler-after-supreme-court-justice-ruth-bader-ginsburg/

    “The U.S. Navy will name one of its new John Lewis-class fleet replenishment oilers after former Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg.

    The future USNS Ruth Bader Ginsburg (T-AO 212) will be the eight ship in the T-AO series and the first U.S. Navy ship to bear her name.

    Secretary of the Navy Carlos Del Toro made the announcement on Thursday.

    “As we close out women’s history month, it is my absolute honor to name the next T-AO after the Honorable Ruth Bader Ginsburg. She is a historic figure who vigorously advocated for women’s rights and gender equality,” said Del Toro. “As Secretary of the Navy, it is my aim to ensure equality and eliminate gender discrimination across the Department of the Navy. She is instrumental to why we now have women of all backgrounds, experiences and talents serving within our ranks, side by side with their male Sailor and Marine counterparts.”
    The John Lewis-class replenishment oilers are all named after civil and human rights leaders and activists. The class and lead ship, T-AO 205, is named in honor of Rep. John Lewis (D-Ga).

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  17. And the creepy part is that she’ll probably be in the top four for the runoff election. Slipstream, have you seen a list of the other 50 yet?

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  18. Sandridge says:

    OMFG! The Chupacabra is back in South Texas!

    [not for the faint of heart]:
    https://nextdoor.com/p/JZ9SJfrPbw5q?view=detail

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  19. Sandridge says:

    AK Lynne @18, That poor wench is still for sale:

    $150
    Badland ZXR 5000 WENCH:
    https://nextdoor.com/for_sale_and_free/40b59752-d273-4088-975f-ddd74fd5f6ad

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  20. Sandridge @ 17,

    I hope the USN never names any vessel for TFG or anyone associated with him. A garbage barge would be too good for him.

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  21. slipstream says:

    Alaska congressional election:

    The top four from the primary will advance to the general.

    Here is a full list of the candidates: Dennis “Denny” W. Aguayo (nonpartisan), Jay R. Armstrong (R), Brian T. Beal (undeclared), Tim Beck (undeclared), Nick Begich (R), Gregg B. Brelsford (undeclared), Robert Brown (nonpartisan), Chris Bye (Libertarian), John T. Callahan (R), Arlene Carle (nonpartisan), Santa Claus (undeclared), John B. Coghill Jr. (R), Christopher S. Constant (D), Breck Craig (nonpartisan), Lady Donna Dutchess (nonpartisan), Otto H. Florschutz III (R), Laurel A. Foster (nonpartisan), Thomas “Tom” R. Gibbons (R), Karyn Griffin (undeclared), Al Gross (nonpartisan), Andrew J. Halcro (nonpartisan), Ted S. Heintz (Libertarian), William “Bill” D. Hibler III (nonpartisan), John Wayne Howe (Alaska Independence), David Hughes (undeclared), Don Knight (nonpartisan), Jeff B. Lowenfels (nonpartisan), Robert “Bob” Lyons (R), Anne M. McCabe (nonpartisan), Mikel R. Melander (R), Sherry M. Mettler (undeclared), Mike Milligan (D), Richard R. Morris (nonpartisan), J.R. Myers (Libertarian), Emil Notti (D), Robert Ornelas (American Independent Party), Sarah Palin (R), Silvio E. Pellegrini (undeclared), Mary S. Peltola (D), Joshua C. Revak (R), Tara M. Sweeney (R), Jesse Sumner (R), Maxwell Sumber (R), David Thistle (undeclared), Ernest F. Thomas (D), Richard “Clayton” Trotter (R), Bradley D. Welter (R), Jason G. William (undeclared), Adam L. Wool (D), Jo Woodward (R), Stephen Wright (R).

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  22. Sandridge says:

    Papa @21, Not even a head or latrine after the Rufous Ratbastard.
    Although I can see scribbling his odious name on chamberpots with Sharpies. ;]

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  23. thatotherjean says:

    Sandridge@ 23

    Writing of chamberpots, maybe we could be like Louis XVI, who was not fond of Benjamin Franklin, the US ambassador to France at the time. He had Franklin’s image painted in the bottom of the royal chamberpot. Seems like a fitting treatment of TFG.

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  24. Sandridge says:

    thatotherjean @24, Maybe some of the ceramic toilet makers could fire some special editions with the ‘Worlds Best Whatever’ visage in the bowl?

    https://www.lowes.com/pl/Toilets-Toilets-toilet-seats-Bathroom/4294737213

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  25. john in denver says:

    slipstream … any of those 51 ever been elected and actually served a complete term in an office that did more than shake hands of people arriving for the “real” start of the Iditarod?

    Anyone in the mix likely to be known well enough to compete with ex-1/2-term-Governor Palin?

    And are Alaskan voters masochistic enough to elevate Palin to another office?

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  26. slipstream says:

    john in denver:

    Democrats: Christopher Constant is currently on the Anchorage Assembly. Most others are unknowns.

    Republicans: Before Young died one Republican was running against him. Now about a dozen are running. This will split the Republican vote, but not enough. At least one Republican will make it through to the general election.

    Name recognition: Santa Claus (a real person who legally changed his name to Santa Claus in 2006) is currently on the North Pole (an actual town in Alaska, nowhere near the real North Pole) town council. He has outstanding name recognition and will probably get a lot of votes. Sarah Palin is second in name recognition, but a lot of Alaskans will remember her quitting in the middle of her term as governor. Nick Begich has name recognition — his grandfather (R) was a member of Congress and his father (D) was a senator.

    If I had to guess today I would say that the four making it through to the general election will be Constant, Begich, Santa Claus, Palin.

    Check back in mid June and see how I did.

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  27. The Surly Professor says:

    We’re getting way off-topic with the dedications (although RGB more than deserves it), but years ago during the first tech bubble it was hot stuff to get donations from alumni in exchange for naming privileges. Everything from an entire school at the university down to individual seats in a lecture hall.

    I proposed in a student mailing list that we do the same for ALL of the facilities, allowing alumni to dedicate individual broom closets and water fountains to whoever they chose. It was flooded (no apologies for the pun) with recent alumni wanting to dedicate toilets and urinals to their least favorite professors. I passed on the results to the University president because the total amounts were building up to over $100,000 in a bidding war. I also mentioned research in Europe indicating that having an aiming point in urinals led to far better marksmanship and cleaner facilities, so Professor X’s name engraved at the bottom would be good for the university. All I asked for was to have one named for me, for having come up with the idea.

    Two things happened: a formal policy statement that limits would be placed on just what could be named for donors. Secondly, all future emails from me to the president would be filtered by an administrative assistant. I also learned that my fellow faculty members overwhelmingly had no sense of humor.

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  28. slipstream says:

    And now Trump has endorsed Sarah Palin in the Alaska congressional race. “Sarah Palin is tough and smart and will never back down,” according to Trump.

    I guess the “will never back down” part explains why she resigned as governor of Alaska midway through her term.

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