Fun With Guns
So, let’s bring back an oldie. Fun With Guns.
There’s some rules: (1) the shooter or the victim has to be doing something stoopid, this is often, more than you would suspect, the same person. (2) We take preference for stories from the South because people in the South have the proper tools to be funny – goats, an empty thermos bottle, a trailer of residence, meth, or roller skates. (3) Nobody can die. That’s not funny. We also don’t like loss of limb or digit, unless it’s the shooter and he had it coming. We once allowed a story about a woman shooting herself though the ta-tas because, come to find out, they weren’t her ta-tas to start with.
Today’s story comes out of California so you can bet there’s no goats involved.
The day after Christmas, Gerald Jacinth of Las Vegas, decides to go shoot his brother-in-law in California. Gerald is 75 years old and his victim is 77 years old. He drives to his brother-in-law’s house, parks across the street, and waits until he comes outside.
Wearing a disguise, Gerald approaches his brother-in-law and tries to hand him a package. The brother-in-law wouldn’t take it. Gerald holds up his bag of presents and shoots his brother-in-law twice. The injuries were non life-threatening. The victim did not recognize his brother-in-law because he was “wearing an over the head mask resembling Donald Trump, white long curly beard and a Santa hat as he made his way up the driveway.”
Well, damn, would you take a special delivery package from Donald Trump Claus?
The police arrived in a minute and since the victim was able to take a picture of Gerald’s car as he drove off, they nabbed him still in the same neighborhood. We don’t know what caused the gunfight, but we are going to add Donald Trump mask to our list of funny tools shooters have.
Oh, no!!!! Santa is a Republican AND a Trumpie! He sure brought the True Believers a lump of coal this Christmas.
1I don’t have anything to top this California story but it makes me think of Dick (head) Cheney shooting his hunting partner in 2006.
2And speaking of guns, I was reading a raw story story this morning about gun nut and now Texan, Ted Nutgent. He epitomizes the NRA and why I hate both of them. Man, I’m glad I never liked his music. He’s like the exact opposite of Willie Nelson, whose music I love.
Sorry my comment breaks the rules for being funny about guns.
I’m so glad this didn’t happen in Texas; I just knew Cruz or Gohmert were going to figure into this!
3Kinda on the same theme, didn’t one of tRumps recent Pardon white dudes say that the ‘first thing he was gonna do was go out & buy a gun?’
4I can think of a lot more appreciative ‘thanks’ but that’s me.
Well, I, for one, am not convinced Donald Trump didn’t do it.
This just might be another plot by the shallow state.
5I don’t think this should be here; the victim got shot, not the shooter. Fun With Guns should be like the stories of guys stuffing handguns in their shorts and, you know.
6Evening J.J.:
7I realize it’s not actually a rule and maybe it’s just me, but the subject of the story shooting himself in the crotchal area always makes my day.
I imagine most second amendment nutcases in that predicament immediately exercise their first amendment rights by screaming loudly, two octaves higher than they ever have
Good times.
if the shooter was wearing a Trump mask there’s a good chance he’ll get a pardon. It’s a twofer, he not only looked like Trump, but then there’s 2nd Amendment rights, the gift that keeps on shooting.
8This doesn’t qualify but nevertheless has its value.
https://www.latimes.com/sports/story/2020-12-27/utahs-ty-jordan-died-after-accidentally-shooting-himself-authorities-say
9I’ll bet he thought, Q-style, that he was saving his sister from something.
10Steve from Beaverton: I also don’t care for Nugent, but there was the one and only hit single the Amboy Dukes had in the 60s: Journey to the Center of Your Mind. It certainly got a lot of play in the Fort Worth area.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Beh1ipK3hN0
11I had that album with (I suppose) Ted’s leg in the fishnet stocking. I bet he doesn’t like that to be seen now.
12