Ladylike, Real Ladylike
Okay, so the accounting firm of Ernst & Young decided that the women at their firm weren’t doing it right. So, they brought in some other people to do a workshop on how to do it right.
When women speak, they shouldn’t be shrill. Clothing must flatter, but short skirts are a no-no. After all, “sexuality scrambles the mind.” Women should look healthy and fit, with a “good haircut” and “manicured nails.”
These were just a few pieces of advice that around 30 female executives at Ernst & Young received at a training held in the accounting giant’s gleaming new office in Hoboken, New Jersey, in June 2018.
Surely they have the date wrong. Surely this was like, I dunno, 1950?
Nope. Last year. They even had a scoresheet.
The executive attendees were told not to talk to men face to face …
- If you’re having a conversation with a man, cross your legs and sit at an angle to him. Don’t talk to a man face-to-face. Men see that as threatening.
Don’t speak up at meetings ..
- Don’t directly confront men in meetings, because men perceive this as threatening. (Women do not.) Meet before (or after) the meeting instead.
And even …
Attendees were even told that women’s brains are 6% to 11% smaller than men’s, Jane said. She wasn’t sure why they were told this, nor is it clear from the presentation. Women’s brains absorb information like pancakes soak up syrup so it’s hard for them to focus, the attendees were told. Men’s brains are more like waffles. They’re better able to focus because the information collects in each little waffle square.
It’s 2019. Two years ago, we had a choice between a man and woman for President. Obviously, even with Trump’s bigger brain, we made the wrong choice.
Earnst & Young says they are not doing this particular training now but they won’t say if they still hire the consultant who did it.
Thanks to Carl for the heads up.
Good grief! Just . . . Good grief!
1More like 1850 rather then 1950! What total bullshite!
2Holy bat guano!!! For reals?!!!
3Spoke with some young male accountants a few years ago who left E&Y to start their own small firm. They mumbled something about not being comfortable with the business practices there. I thought that was odd but they quickly changed the subject. Now I wonder if this sort of misogyny was a part of it and what else is going on there. Wow….
wait, down in the fine print, does that say “Marsha Clark and Associates”??? Surely it can’t be………
4You got to believe in something…. The Pointer Sisters lay it out for the Patriarch Moses and it does bear repeating.
https://aeon.co/videos/goddesses-of-antiquity-offer-moses-a-path-away-from-patriarchy-via-funk-and-soul
I posted this last week along with the first spacewalk video by two female astronauts (a first). Then Fenway Fran put this up:
“And more on the spacewalk…CSPAN has 45 flipping off the astronauts after being corrected by ‘fixing’ his ‘hair’ with his middle finger.”
5I am very careful when I talk to men, because I don’t want to frighten anybody–except when I do. I confess I have scared one or two in my time.
However, the good ones are mostly sweeties and neither scared of women nor need to be.
6Would love to hear what the company tells male staff/execs about their appearance.
7Steve – Nah, it’s not OJ’s Maria Clark. ‘Nother one.
8The website for Martha Clark & Associates is perfectly in keeping with the post, and is well worth reading on its own. What century are they living in?
http://marshaclarkandassociates.com/programs.html
9There were 30 female executives who put up with this demeaning BS and didn’t tell them to f*** off?
Everything being equal, there should be a demeaning work shop for men.
10Do they also have lessons in quilting and needlepoint so the womenfolk have something to do while the men do all the thinking?
My already low opinion of EY got even lower.
11They forgot: never own your own e-mail server.
12“Don’t talk to a man face-to-face. Men see that as threatening.”
Women have the power to overwhelm men JUST BY LOOKING AT THEM? You would think a company would want to use this ability when they have discussions and negotiations with other businesses. Send in the Women’s Team.
Also, women should be offered promotions into management positions. If they can keep their staff on track JUST BY LOOKING AT THEM, think of all the time saved in policy reminders and departmental meetings.
13ERNST & YOUNG: We have too much money. Please sue us. Road map provided.
14How would this work shop address what is feminine and what is masculine for LGBTQ executives? Masculine and feminine values may be different for them.
15What in the actual fresh hell is this: Childlike/assertive
16Makes me want to squeeze until things pop off.
Rick @ 12
Of course women have the power overwhelm by just looking at them. Mommas do it to keep their offspring to keep them in line.
17I have tried to live like a gentleman, as per the axiom “A gentleman is someone who doesn’t insult others by accident”.
That being stated, these people are effing trogladitic morons whose delusions of masculinity somehow got lost in a prior century. Now a days real men can handle being looked in the eye without being emasculated…
18What century was this, again? My opinion of Ernst & Young just dropped through the floor. If they don’t do this to men (and I’ll bet they don’t), I hope they get sued for humiliating their female employees. That’s disgusting.
19When I worked, they did the tax work – this explains why they didn’t have many women, but Deloitte and other big firms do. Poor men, such tender little flowers that they can’t take an educated, experienced CPA?
20If someone had tried to tell my wife to act like that they would have to have had quick reflexes.
21Go on their Facebook page – there are some hilarious comments
22I would walk the hell out of there.
23Men have bigger brain, but also more empty space.
24Pretty sure these guidelines were written by a Republican
woman.
In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their family member lay gravely ill.
Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber.
“I’m afraid I’m the bearer of bad news,” he said as he surveyed the worried faces.
“The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant. It’s an experimental procedure, very risky but it is the only hope. Insurance will cover the procedure, but you will have to pay for the brain yourselves.”
The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a great length of time, someone asked, “Well, how much does a brain cost?”
The doctor quickly responded, “$5,000 for a male brain, and $200 for a female brain.”
The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked.
A man unable to control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask, “Why is the male brain so much more?”
The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and explained to the entire group, “It’s just standard pricing procedure. We have to mark down the price of the female brains, because they’ve actually been used.”
25This smacks of the brainwashing men did just after WWII when the women who had won the war at home, building airplanes and ships and bombs and breaking codes, were handed their pink slips and told to go to the bedroom and put them on.
This is nothing new. The poor guy can’t even dream up a new tactic to get rid of us.
26Calling all class action litigators…
27Remind me again who hates us for our freedom?
28Have worked for outfits like that – Men Great, Women APPENDAGES. I left one of those jobs just before the company went under and was taken over by another. It was one of the easiest grabs in business history. Its amazing that zero thinking is still in corporate form like those “consultants”. They are more like dinosaurs who have made it all these millennia by hiding out on an island always covered by fog.
29Liberty Belle @24,
30My first thought too, it had to be an Anglo, superxtian talibangelical, woman Rethuglikan to come up with that kind of mind-numbing patriarchal bullshit.
Don Draper on line 2…
Can a man and a woman have a private meeting in this outfit, or does the Pence Rule apply?
31There are several women running for president this time, who aren’t nearly as universally reviled as Hillary Clinton. Perhaps a better gauge of woman vs man is coming up.
32