Dropping Like Drunks At A Frat Party
Republicans whined two years ago and said they lost the House because of too many retirements. Not because of Trump, mind you. It was because too many Repubicans jumped ship.
Michigan Rep. PAUL MITCHELL, Texas Rep. PETE OLSON and Alabama Rep. MARTHA ROBY all said they were calling it quits. Republicans say they lost the House because of too many retirements last cycle, yet they are seeing a steady stream of lawmakers forgo reelection once again.
I, of course, am most interested in Pete Olson, who spent his term in congress pretty much imitating a tree stump. He is my damn congressvarmint. Olson went from winning by 18 points in 2016 to 5 points last year. It has become one of the most diverse districts in the country. Olson may be dumb as a sack of hammers but even he saw what’s coming.
The district is now considered a tossup. Can you imagine the smile on my face that Tom’s DeLay’s home district, which he personally gerrymandered, is flipping blue?
My friend Buck told me that if the district flips, he and I are riding his Harley to Tom’s house and dance right there in the street to a Willie Nelson tune. I hope I get arrested because I know some some folks who would get in line to pay my bail.
I be good fo’ a hundo on yer bail, Hon.
1Oh please have video! We got rid of John Culberson last year and I’m so glad!
2Go Texas! Flipping old Tom DeLay’s district calls for a special happy dance. Although my moves when Lyin’ Ryan ‘retired’ will be hard to replicate. Now if ya’ll would pick off Cornyn’s Senate seat…
3I think I’d buy me an airplane ticket to see that!!! I remember fondly the 4th of July holiday when Marsha drove Spanky through Sugar Land, right by Tom’s street. I got to ride shotgun, toss trinkets to anyone who would acknowledge us, and cue the patriotic music. Ahhhh, the good old days.
4Yep. That’s the ticket.
“We lost the House because Republicans retired. And then those pesky people voted Democrats in instead of the Republicans we picked to replace them.
“BRING ON THE RUSSIANS! GET THEM INVOLVED IN CONGRESSIONAL ELECTIONS, TOO!”
Oh, what’s that you say? The Iranians are getting involved now? And they DON’T like Trump and will work against him?
“WE’VE GOT TO GET THOSE FOREIGNERS OUT OF OUR ELECTIONS!”
5Well, JJ, you do have hot-and-cold running lawyers at your house. Go ahead and get arrested–especially if it’s for humiliating Tom D.
6I think they are trying to hold on to whatever reputation they still have.
7It will be a bloodbath after Trump.
Remember how Bush was eliminated from the Republican memory?
Trump’s name will be incinerated.
If you publicize it right, JJ, I’ll bet it could turn into one heck of street dance.
8Yea, I noticed all the Rs suddenly jumping ship, like a flea convention jumping off a dog. Decided not to keep track of them all like I did the last time. Way too much trouble for way too many people wh are way not worth it.
9Count me in if you need help with bail. Hell. I might fly out from Long Island just to dance with y’all.
10I’d be delighted to kick in some bail money for such a worthy cause, ma’am–especially if there’s video.
11I think the bigger picture is that the teabaggers are either dying off or running out of steam. For sure, they’re not getting more commonsensical.
12Don’t think I can be there to queue up, but I’ll pony up some bail money if needed. You’ve got my email address.
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