Amusing Republican Men on Social Media
Y’all, I am convinced that Republican men wake up every morning intent on entertaining me for the day. I want them to know that I appreciate it with all my heart.
Let us begin with this doozy from the Bevy of Bozos around Ted Cruz.
Yes, Nick, and since Obamacare there have been absolutely no attacks on the World Trade Center or, come to think of it, space aliens wanting to see your private parts. I will admit that I am not certain bout the last one because I truly have no idea what goes on in your head. Or your private parts, thank God.
And then last night I get word of an odd event from people asking, “what the hell?” Remember when I told you about David Hamilton who is running for the state house in my county? You know, the self-professed “Christian” who likes to hit women and even fessed-up to doing it?
Well, Mr. Hamilton is one confused lost soul. Or drunk. Could be drunk.
Yes, he’s talking about me.
Mr. Hamilton took to the powerful forces of his Facebook page to ask a provocative question about my fake name and my fake skin color.
His question was not only dumb, it was kinda prissy for a grown man. He’s too scared to use my name. Oh yeah, tough guy when it comes to shoving and hitting women in front of health clinics. Not so tough guy on Facebook.
Besides the fact that my full driver-license name is on this not-a-blog (eyes right), and besides the fact that I often post pictures of myself gallivanting around the state of Texas to speak, and besides the fact that I have written about Juanita in the local newspaper starting before Mr. Hamilton was even born, and beside the fact that if you Google a picture of someone named Juanita, you get every race, hair style, and fine looking females known to God above including my personal favorite, Juanita Banana which is a popular Filipino teevee show … Yeah, yeah, besides that, I’m a real sneaky manipulator who wants people to think that I am something other than a big haired Texas woman.
Thanks for snickers, guys.
Amazing what a guy will say to the world at large to keep his name before the public.
1As media whores go, David Hamilton is kinda low rent dontcha think?
2“Ted Cruz is a Republican senator from Texas. Before his election to Congress in 2010, there had never been a confirmed case of Ebola in the U.S.”
3Nick I think your on to something there!
4As Juanita Banana always says, “If your parents didn’t have any children, chances are you wouldn’t have any either.”
My response would be: what would you say about a white republican man named David Hamilton, who hits women and is running for political office for the purpose of manipulating laws to support his hateful agenda and lining his pockets with taxpayer money.
5Seriously, what man would go after the owner of The World’s Most Dangerous Beauty Salon?
We have hairpins and know how to use ’em!
And Nick needs a better haircut.
6Wow Mrs. B! Old David just awarded you magical powers on par with the blah guy in the White House and hacking skills the envy of the NSA. Amazing how you turn on all of our computers every day and coax us out of bed with magic coffee dosed to make us think liberal thoughts.
Someone needs to take control of the parental controls on David’s TV. Launching a conspiracy theory of this magnitude can only be the result of watching too much Fox Not the News.
7there were no auto accidents until rutherford hayes was elected president !!
8What would you say about a white-bread politician who advertises his Christian beliefs on his campaign literature and uses his little boy like a stage prop for the purpose of manipulating people to support his political ambitions?
I would say he has really poor reading comprehension, or it’s been a long time since he looked at the New Testament, especially the parts printed in red.
His campaign literature claims that “his faith in God gives him a solid moral framework that will allow him to legislate in accordance with the ‘golden rule’.”
That must be the *other* golden rule…
9Just one more sign he is afraid of women who know their own minds. Also that his private parts most likely are, well, nothing to get excited about.
10The great thing is, that lame tweet is the absolute best this bonehead has. What a moron.
11What Davey-poo is actually saying is, WAAAAAAAAA! I WANT MY MOMMEEEEE!
12Dang you are funny. Reading your not a blog is now a must for me every day. (Must be because I don’t watch TV.)
13What? Juanita? You’ve been manipulating me? When did that start?
14Micr, I think you’ve got it: Ted Cruz must be the cause of ebola in the US!
15Timbo, is that “other” Golden Rule” the one that sez, Them that has the gold makes the rules”? If so, I think you nailed it.
16If he thinks Juanita Jean is a minority name, he doesn’t know white trash Texas…and WE GET TO VOTE, BUDDY!
17I’m 79 and I have never seen such stupidity in my life. Do the Republicans spend much time trying to find such dolts to represent them or is it easy to find them under the woodpile or in the compost heap? I wish that my fourth grade teacher, Mrs. DeForce, was still around to whack them on the hand with her ruler for their stupidity. Sometimes I just despair.
Keep writing. It helps my attitude.
18Great funny comments! Giggling here.
19Shoot. Wouldn’t you know….. I can’t find this idiot on Facebook.
Maybe he doesn’t really exist.
On the other hand…. JJ does..All blonde hair and blue eyes… “minority”…. of her……..
I’m through playing with the bully dummies for the day.
I got nothing for a man who physically or mentally abuses women, except contempt.
20I don’t find “Herownself” to be a particularly ethnic name.
Also, let’s not forget that in Mayberry, there were not one but TWO Juanitas: Of course, there is the never-seen Juanita Beasley, the waitress at the Junction Cafe. Barney was often romancing her on the phone. She *could* have been Hispanic, but Beasley is not “Minority-Sounding.”
And then, there was that songbird par excellence, that paragon of feminine pulchritude, Juanita Pike, the Mayor’s daughter. Oh my, that girl could fracture a note! But she was a true daughter of the confederacy: white as an albino ghost eating marshmallows in a blizzard.
Fun trivia: the actress who played Juanita Pike is the daughter of Norman Lloyd, Dr Auschlander on St Elsewhere. He turns 100 years young in 2 weeks. Let’s hope someone other than his daughter sings Happy birthday.
21We never had Ebola in the USA before there was a Fox Channel…
22Before Obamacare, there has not been an affordable way for Americans to get healthcare, so if, in the very unlikely case that they get ebola, they will be well cared for… except in states where idiot Republican governors refused to implement the expansion of Medicaid. There’s a special place in hell for people who proclaim their religion and stick it to the poor.
23I didn’t know you were trying to manipulate me. I was a Democrat long before we met.
24Rick and Corinne Sabo, I have been trying to resist all day, really I have. But that closing line “Thanks for snickers, guys.” ruined me. Gotta have it, gotta have it, off to the store for candy bars. She made me do it.
25Reminds me of the Republican Halloween cartoon. “If I were really getting into the spirit of the Halloween season I’d put the Halloween candy up on the roof, take down the ladder and lock it up in the shed, and then tell the kiddies that if they are patient, hard working, diligent, and patriotic some day the candy will trickle down to their eager little mitts.”
http://www.lifewithlevi.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/Republican-Halloween.jpg
26Before Obama,dumbass dubya was the dumbest SOB ever to infest the WH. After Obama,it will still be true.
27I think Nick Muzin is a made up name so, therefore, whoever this cretin is, he doesn’t exist!!
28e platypus onion, dubya’s record of all-time dolt hopefully will never be broken. Then again, Saint Rayguns delivered nearly as much, if not more, damage and his destruction continues long after his death.
“Trickle Down” the economic theory defined as peeing on my leg and calling it rain. “Mission Accomplished” the theory of bombing for friends and supplying jihadists a recruitment tool good for generations.
29Marcia in CO, it’s final. Canada has declared war on the US. Daffy Cruz, Jr., Bieber, now this Nick trough of dumb all sent south of a border once known as the friendliest undefended border in history.
That’s it. Off to our backyard to exercise my 2nd A rights on some Anne Murray records. OOPs, we don’t own any.
30I googled around and found that Hamilton’s porn name is “Maxx Jammer.”
He should use it. It’s less boring than the one he’s got.
31Q: Can you name two idiot rightwing clowns?
A: Nick Muzin and David Hamilton.
32Monty, is that like the potato chip test of politics? Bet you can’t stop with just naming two……
Chips, candy bars … you folks are insidious!
33JJ, why aren’t you on Facebook? Or are you and I just can’t find you. Your humor keeps me rational and not enough people know about this blog imo.
34Lucy – I am. https://www.facebook.com/JuanitaJeans
35There’s a whole string of Republicans we could blame for Ebola, using that twisted illogic.
Before Rick Perry was governor of Texas…we never had a case of Ebola.
Ted Cruz has been taken, but going on…
Before John Carter was my Congresscritter…
Before the Supreme Court gutted the principles of democracy by not standing up for voting rights…
Before Congress cut funding to NIH and CDC…
Before the Senate refused to confirm a Surgeon General…
(It’s a target-rich environment, folks…)
Before Rick Perry refused to expand Medicaid… (and by the way, if he hadn’t refused, the hospital might not have been so eager to get Mr.Duncan out of their ER…)
Before Greg Abbott wasted all that taxpayer money suing the feds….
(OK, you get my point. I don’t want to be tedious…moving on to the “Juanita” issue…)
For those of us with sufficient time in grade, so to speak, we’re aware that name popularity goes in waves, and at times in the past Juanita was a popular name among pink folks. Parents who were just slightly daring, in that era, would name their little pink baby girls Juanita. It was also a popular name in that era among folks of other coloration.
Sneering at a name’s ethnicity is pretty daring for someone whose Party is headed by a man named Reince Priebus, which sounds suspiciously like rinsing something I’d rather not contemplate. In fact, the GOP is full of people with “ethnic” names who all look very pink in photographs. Like Muzin, Cruz, LaFaro…tell me at least one of those people shouldn’t be, by his name, brown.
36Maybe I have misunderstood the conceit of this not blog all along…you are Susan Bankston. Miss Juanita owns the salon and you kindly relay her wisdom to those not privileged to know her personally, right?
37Let’s also thank St. Ronnie for HIV. He refused to stop all air traffic from Africa and thousands of Americans died.
38Elizabeth, you’ve probably heard this before, but if you remove the vowels from the name Reince Priebus, what you’re left with is RNC PR BS. Suits him to a T.
39WRT Nick Muzin (who is not a-muzin at all):
What is it with Republicans and their bad humor? We see this all the time: They say (or tweet) something really stupid. Then they claim they were “just joking”.
When will they stop trying to use “humor” as an excuse for their stupidity and callousness?
Why is it the GOP can elect governors and senators, yet cannot tell their people to stop joking in public? Either they have really bad taste and just don’t realize it, or they haven’t figured out that “I was just joking” has never fooled anyone and still does not.
40Here he is folks, with his stepford wife and son who isn’t old enough to know any better! Looks like he never step’s outside when the sun’s shining!
http://www.hamilton4tx.com/about
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