Well, This Scared Me
I saw these headlines and almost fainted.
Former “Saturday Night Live” cast member Victoria Jackson wants her next act to be as a Williamson County Commissioner.
Jackson, who moved to Thompson’s Station last year, is petitioning as an independent to become a candidate for one of two District 2 commission seats, currently held by commissioners Betsy Hester and John Hancock.
Get the smelling salts, Aunt Daisy. (1) We have a Williamson County in Texas, and (2) Victoria Jackson is Louie Gohmert Crazy. I was terrified.
We’d have to add two extra days in every week just to load up all the crazy. We’d have to call them Crazday and Loonday. That means I’d have to buy a new calendar and I’m kinda partial to my almost nakkid firemen calendar.
Well, come to find out, she’s running in Williamson County, Tennessee, which appears to be just south of Nashville.
“I think the key to saving America is normal everyday citizens getting involved because we the people are supposed to be in control, not the government,” Jackson said.
Honey, if we were to divide America into a normal everyday citizen side and a crazier than a drunk mule side, you better open a distillery or you ain’t gonna have dinner money.
And then she said —
“I think I will fit in quite easily with (the current county commission),” Jackson said. “I went to the dentist recently and there was a Bible in the lobby of the dentist office. … I love this town. My two favorite things are here – Jesus and show business.”
Look, my two favorite things are pink feather boas and gospel music, but that does not make me qualified to run for office, you know?
Jackson said she has been researching the Muslim Brotherhood, Agenda 21 and the Common Core education standards, all of which she speaks sharply against.
None of which has diddle squat to do with county commissioning.
She did not know when to shuddup.
“I have no political aspirations. I just want to help save my country. It should be about ideology, not about who has the most money.”
Honey, it’s becoming increasingly obvious that you’re making more money off Jesus than show business. Maybe you need to get a third favorite thing. I dunno. Do you like coloring books?
Jackson’s full married name, which she officially filed with the Williamson County Election Commission, is Victoria Lynn Jackson-Wessel. However, she told deputy administrator Chad Gray that she wanted her name to appear on the ballot as Victoria Jackson “because she said people thought it said weasel.”
I don’t know what to say. I really, really don’t. And if I did, I’d probably just die of mortification.
Thanks to Brian for the heads up.
“Look, my two favorite things are pink feather boas and gospel music, but that does not make me qualified to run for office, you know?”
Hey, Jesse Ventura had pink feather boas and was governor of Minnesota. Don’t think he had gospel music, through, he seems to be more of a heavy metal listener.
“Minnesota: My Governor Can Beat Up Your Governor.”
1“weasel”. Well, she said it, we didn’t.
2Wessel, weasel, all the same thing in the Tea Bag lexicon of gohmert placards. Victoria Weasel is their kind of candidate.
3BTW That is one scary photograph. It’s as if a mad scientist mixed Tammy Faye’s ashes with Miss Piggy’s stuffing.
4Williamson County is one of the wealthiest in the state, and is in the heavily gerrymandered district of US Rep Marsha Blackburn [the new Michele Bachmann]. The Bible references aren’t accidental, as there’s a high percentage of politically active Super Deluxe Brand Christians. I grew up just south of there, when Middle TN was a reliable swing area. Sigh.
5Oh geeze, JJ.
This imbecile is right at home. This is Marsha Blackburn’s district. This is also Judson Phillips’ – failed attorney and TeaPartyPatriot prez – owes IRS back taxes and State of Tennessee all kinds of taxes ‘hood……she will fail, but she will have this ginormous tourist attraction to view:
http://www.roadsideamerica.com/tip/3289
Nothing says “special” like being in the middle of the KKK!
Will not surprise me if she is presented by the General Assembly of Baggers as their “Bagger Princess for a Day”~
Criminy.
6I couldn’t help it. When I read her comments, I imagine them in that high-pitched squeaky voice of hers. Believe it or not, her voice makes Palin sound as melodious as Morgan Freeman – and that’s something.
7“I think the key to saving America is normal everyday citizens getting involved because we the people are supposed to be in control, not the government,” Jackson said.
Hey Victoria, you said it yourself – – the key is for you to remain an involved citizen to be in control. Please take your own advice and don’t run.
8SNL is going to have great fun with one of their alums trying to save the country! For them, no one and no thing is sacred just so they can score a crackin’ good skit on Saturday Night. Which for some odd reason is showing up in my area on Friday nights! Poor Victoria! She is so lucky to be born so cute (cuz next to her a tree stump is a Ph.D.).
9I recollect not being amused by her on SNL.
10Then I read about her on Wikipedia today.
If I was a Repub and voted in Williamson, I wouldn’t vote for her. But I don’t. Maybe she won’t weasel her way onto Commissioners’ Court.
I think the weasel is living in her hairdo.
11I would say, “She has a room temperature IQ level” but it’s winter and…. Oh, hell, I’d say it anyway.
12If it looks like a weasel, swims like a weasel, and squawks like a weasel, then it’s a weasel.
13The characters she played on SNL were always the flaky dumb blondes. Stereo- typically, she happens to act and speak like those characters in “real life”, the personification of a Repug woman. Because Jesus.
14Thank you! Funniest thing I’ve read all day. Out of the ballpark JJ You are a treasure.
15It’s not just that Jackson’s not playing with a full deck, is that she doesn’t have any idea that full decks even exist.
16The thing is with tea-baggers,they worried that Obama would govern as a Muslim-he is not and does not. They can’t wait to force their ideological brand of phony christian BS on everyone. CINOS. Jackson is well schooled in the Palin school of righteous victimhood.
17e platypus onion, seriously. Holy Gohmerts. The Tea Bag/Corporate/Repuke play book is so gohmert obvious.
If only the DINOs would get up off their lazy hind quarters, there could be hope. Tea Bags, Rinos, DINOs and the Koch Brother scam can be defeated.
Complaining Palin? Time to hit the sponsors of any channel that gives air time to the Scammer of Scottsdale. BTW How is Todd’s pimp gig going?
18That’s supposed to be a grown woman? With a bright pink bow with white polka-dots on it in her hairmess?
Just on the basis of fashion awareness (and I’m no fashionista) she’s a disaster. Bows like that do not go with a two strand pearl necklace and a black whatever-that-is she’s wearing, and the earrings…honey chile, you don’t wear dangle-ball earrings with a pearl necklace. Unless everthang you got on is plastic. Which it looks like.
19PLease Please Please….
Williamson County, TENNESEE!!! Lordy, not here.
http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/wireStory/victoria-jackson-files-county-seat-tenn-22357872
20Google Republican Nut Club. Have fun. and remember that the Kochs are busily lining up their Tea Party candidates from the dog catcher all the way to the top. Now I’m gonna research the Tennessee Legislature and Koch brothers and see what they’re up to over there.
21I thought she was just playing a part on SNL. Guess she fooled me!
22Bless her heart. Now somebody go look up campaign donations and see where hers are coming from.
23Never saw her on SNL. I’ve missed the past few decades of it, on purpose, thank you very much. I did tune in for Tina Fey as $Payme, but I thought it quite mediocre. She looks like the kinda gal who likes My Little Pony — as an intellectual pursuit.
24She looks like a cross between Miss Piggy and Daisy Mae. Tennessee is a good place for her.
25I wonder what County Commissioners do in Tennessee? In Texas and Louisiana it is a license to steal, but they also have to fill the potholes and keep the right of way mowed. I can’t imagine that Agenda 21 and Jesus are very high on their list of problems.
26Back in the day, when she was on SNL, I thought the “dingyness” was and act.
I couldn’t have been more wrong. Just Saying…
27Victoria Jackson hasn’t looked like that photo in a long while, although even in her recent older, porkier photos she’s sporting a big hair bow. I thought she was hilarious on SNL and very subversive in her ditzy way. I wonder how she was clobbered into the Jesus tent.
28Ms Jackson’s bow tie is rilly an air filter. It picks poisonous gas fumes and sends them to her stomach. That keeps it upset so she can snarl at Dems. Then when it is time to speak with wingnuts she swallows just enough pepto-dismal to take the edge off.
29AlaninAustin: it’s even more insulting in Celsius.
30Ah, not so much. Having moved away from Tennessee (Wilson County), I feel that I must’ve gotten out in time!
Williamson is where Franklin is, which is home to lots of celebs. And Tennessee is way, WAY too religious lately, what with the Lege and the Guv being Uber-conservative. (Didja know that Nashville has about 700 churches? I don’t know if that includes the suburbs/Metro outliers, But there seems to be one on every corner, so you never know.)
Vickee will fit right in. She could be the daughter of Dolly Parton via Minnie Pearl! Without their smarts, ‘tho…
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