Hey, Is This Opposite Day or Something?
So, Ted Cruz is distancing himself from the whacked out batcrap crazy stuff in the Officially Licensed Ted Cruz Coloring Book.
He admitted that he doesn’t think that Obamacare is “worse than any war,” which is oddly reassuring from a man who never fought in a war.
But listen to the man who is doing a fellowship in Political Stuntery.
“This is a city where it’s all politics all the time, and I’m trying to do my best to not pay attention to the politics, to focus on fixing the problem,” Mr. Cruz said. “I know that’s hard to believe because no one in this town does that. This is a time for people to step up and do the right thing and that’s what I’m trying to do.”
Holy crap in combat boots – the man has Political Whore tattooed on his butt.
Thanks to Brian for the heads up.
Well, Tedster, la di frickin’ da!
1Slime scrapes Cruz off of the soles of its shoes….
2If Cruz wants to “…step up and do the right thing”, he can start by going back to Canada, Cuba or whatever rock he was living under. His next “step up” would be to pay back to America the 25 billion he wasted on his mission to shut down the government and then apologize to the American people. Next he can burn the Confederate flag he likes to fly at his speeches. And last, but not least, he should apologize to our President for his lies, personal attacks and disrespect. Then go bye byes.
3I hope to God Cruz doesn’t get himself a Miley Cyrus outfit so he can show off his butt tattoo … She’s bad enough, he’d surely have us going blind!!
4Seriously, Cruz is still trying to convince any knothole who will listen to him that it was the Democrat’s who shut down the Government … it wasn’t HIM nor the Repukes. The creature is so mentally deficient … yes, I wish he’d slither back under the rock he crawled out of.
Ted, Ted, Tea. First you sink the SS Tea Party ship under your $27 billion tsunami of green eggs and ham, then you fly out of DC leaving the EUI undone, and now you are trying to sell a course correction on your sunken ship?
Fixing things, Ted? Move over Louie, there is a bigger BS-er than you slinging the hubris.
5side by side of some real asses
6Back-pedalling is also harder to do in Washington, esp if you have Ambitions.
7I wish my sainted father were alive today. I can just hear him mumbling something fatherly and encouraging about Mr Cruz. Something along the lines of “Teddie Cruz! Somebody gonna drop a snake in that boy’s pocket and axe him for a light.”
8The twerk and the twerp.
9Thanks everybody! Ha!
For those who haven’t read it yet, Dave Barry offers an interesting take on the letters in “Senator Ted Cruz” in his “Year in Review” article in the Miami Herald. It’s at the end of the September section and concerns Ted’s sillibuster, but I don’t know if it’s suitable for Momma.
10Brian and Umpty Dump:
11You are masters of the “brevity is the soul of wit” technique.
Senor Cruz makes it easy when he says kiss my arse,just pick a spot. He’s all arse. Imitation is the sincerest form of flatulence. Tubby or not tubby,fat is the question. I am older,Budweiser now. Who was born in a stable and people have been following him for years? Secretariat.
12maryelle, for a long time it seemed to me that twerp is somewhat synonymous with dork, but the scales fell from my eyes today when I looked up the many different definitions of both in the Urban Dictionary. A couple of my favorites for twerp are:
#4. Justin Bieber.
#5. “Someone who shoves false teeth up his rear end and bites the buttons off of the back seats of taxi cabs.” – per Kurt Vonnegut.
#7. A kid who farts in the bathtub and eats the bubbles.
Many of the definitions for dork are much cruder, so I’ll leave it to you to look them up if you’re so inclined.
13My son, now recovered from the flu that ruined Christmas at our house, comments thusly to his dear old silver haired mother: Cruz is a more profane twerker than Billy Ray’s kid could ever be.
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