Williamson County, Texas, Where The Jerks Roam and The Skies Are Cloudy All Day
Okay, this is going to be a long story but you might want to pay attention because the same thing is happening in your county. I promise you that.
This is about Williamson County, Texas, and the buffoons on their commissioners court. In Texas, county commissioners are the single most corruptible job in government. Each county has 4 of them and they are led by Boss Hogg (at least in my county) called the County Judge. Oddly, the county judge doesn’t have to be a judge. In my county, the last three of them have been Republicans and high school graduates. Seriously.
They decide how all the tax money is spent, so lots of people want to be their friends. In a loophole designed specifically as pro-corruption, county commissioners do not have to get bids to hire professional services for the county — that’s lawyers, engineers, architects, auditors, hookers … (okay, I made up the hooker part. I’m just guessing on that part.)
Consequently, these “professionals” want to be close friends with county commissioners so they can get enough taxpayer money to air condition hell. Commissioners can accept gifts from these people as long as such gifts are disclosed in their financial statements. These financial statements are open for public view. But there’s a catch. You have to ask for them in writing and they can only be viewed during normal business hours at the county clerk’s office. Copies of them cost $1 a page.
But, the real corruption is in the form of campaign donations. They can take unlimited campaign donations from these professionals. And they can spend that money any way they want to. One of my county commissioners bought a pickup truck for his son and called it a “campaign truck.” His son lives in another county and doesn’t even have his dad’s bumper sticker on the truck. Another was spending it on his girlfriend in Austin. Our county judge tried to pay his wife for doing campaign work for him. Another one is buying clothes with it, contending he needs those clothes to go to work in.
And do you think the district attorney would prosecute this caca del toro? Oh please, slap yourself. They set the district attorney’s salary and his operating budget.
I know this story is getting as long as a West Texas well rope, but I’m gonna quit spattering grease in a minute and get to the bacon.
Welcome to Williamson County, Texas, which is just north of Austin and deeply mired in Tea Party politics. I’m going up there to speak to the Sun City Democrats in November so I figure I might was well ride into town with a target on my back so here goes.
Back in June, there was an open constable position in the county so the county commissioners interviewed some people before they voted to fill the job. A man named Robert Lloyd interviewed and was astounded to be asked his position on gay marriage and abortion. Constables don’t have anything to do with that. Constables serve civil papers, not deliver babies or perform marriages.
But it gets even better. Robert Lloyd sued them.
“He said to the commissioners it was tough to answer the question about gay marriage,” the lawsuit states. “Defendants did not approve of this attitude, and even told Mr. Lloyd he needed a better answer to their questions about gay marriage.”
After the interview, commissioners voted unanimously to hire the brother-in-law of the of the person who serves as attorney for the Commissioners Court.
Obviously, you cannot ask questions like that because even the Texas Constitution says you can’t.
I do not know what the correct answer to gay marriage is but I suspect it involves the F word and heavy weaponry.
So, what does Williamson County do? Do they use the above mention “attorney for commissioners court” or even the county attorney, whose duty it is to represent the county?
.
No, the county attorney, Republican Doyle “Dee” Hobbs, Jr., is apparently not qualified to handle “representing the county.” Republicans are kinda famous for that.
So, the county commissioners go out and hire the powerhouse law firm Bracewell & Giuliana in Houston.
You will thoroughly enjoy what Bracewell and Giuliana are charging the taxpayers of Williamson County to defend raw and vicious hate on commissioners court so they could brother-in-law in the good ole boy they wanted in the first place.
As you read through the contract anyone who has ever dealt with these things can tell you that it’s not unusual for you to pay the hourly charge of 7 or 8 lawyers in the firm for a meeting on your case, and that hourly charges are the least of the charges. The real money comes from “expenses.” Holy cow, what they charge for a paperclip makes the $175 for a hospital aspirin look like a bargain.
So, finally, I get to what I want to say: Have you ever notice that Republicans won’t give a slice of bread to a starving baby but will pay millions of dollars to a legal firm to defend their right to hate entire groups of people?
That’s what I wanted to say. Sorry it took me so long to get to it.
Thanks to Elizabeth Moon for the heads up.
In Arizona we call them county supervisors and the system of which you speak of, “the good ole boy” system.
1Republicans love to outsource legal representation to expensive law firms who are often times connected to said Republicans. They have no issue spending tax payer money on these firms who give no real value. Why even have a district or county attorney if you are just going to hire outside law firms?
2Hi, I’m a tea-partier!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nnUfPQVOqpw&feature=player_embedded
3They’re Republicans. They’re “Entitled” to that kind of system abuse because it makes them rich at taxpayers expense. Why are you even questioning their privilege? It’s a real shame we’re not allowed to shoot these people.
4Sigh. And I thought that all the county commissioners did, or did in west Texas, was to loan out road graders to folks who wanted to flatten out their roads to the ranch. I don’t guess there’s too much call for road graders in Williamson County, not unless they have oil.
5Considering that the Mayor and several City Council members are being investigated for funny campaign business, all of which is lot more benign than JJ’s examples, by the Feds, no less, I really, really, really don’t want to hear from another soul (especially from Texas) about how we don’t “deserve” representation in the Congress of the US–even though we are citizens–because of the quality of people (all 13 of them) we elect to office.
6Well, I knew the County Judge didn’t have to be an attorney, let alone a judge, but I never knew that usual government ethics rules do not apply to county commissioners. This sordid tale just blows my mind. Truly.
7I remember the Watergate Hearings and all the lawyers Nixon and his ilk hired. I was on the plane with one. I was returning from a visit with my in laws where they got to spoiling my toddling daughter. This Nixon lawyer looked like a race track tout, although a very expensive one. He drank like alcohol was about to disappear and there wasn’t thing the crew could do about it cuz, as I said, he was one of Nixon’s lawyers. After we landed in D.C. and were in the process of leaving our seats, I put my toddler down for a moment in the seat beside me to grab my purse, then I grabbed her and stepped into the aisle just as Nixon’s lawyer was getting up all sloppy drunk — and fell into the back of the seat where my daughter had been sitting and collapsed the seat back forward. Everyone was disgusted with him and couldn’t get far enough away from him as we de-planed. He managed to wobble into the airport and the last I saw of him he was leaned stupified against a wall with everyone making a very large space for him. Yes, he was picked — literally! — by a limo and a driver.
No matter what their function they just don’t change, do they, JJ!
8Lawyers have rules and regulations in Texas? This has to be some sort of oversight. At least the rules work in favor of the lawfirm if the county reneges on payment. That is a plus,I guess.
9I live in Williamson County and I wouldn’t even put a bumper sticker on car car because these people are crazy. I don’t pay attention to Texas politics (except for this site) because I’m too old and tired to do much except remember the good ones…Ann Richards, Molly Ivans and Barbara Jordan. I vote and keep my head down and keep waiting for our people to take back the promised land.
10Juanita, another first rate journalistic effort. Relating Texas politics to reasonably sane people would evoke a loud guffaw. Whats truly sad, the participants have zero pride in correcting a system of disgraceful government.
11If Texans hate taxes so much,who is supposed to pay these exhorbitant fees? Commissioners might be giving city and county property and mineral rights away. Maybe they are selling your first born children.
12I’m one of the beleaguered Williamson Co. taxpayers who will be on the hook for what the county commissioner miscreants did. I’ve heard Robert Lloyd’s story and can’t blame him for suing. JJ, let me know if you need someone to have your back in Nov. when you come speak to us. We’ll get a posse — I mean an honor guard — and meet you at the county line! BTW, I’ve had Democratic bumper stickers front and back, on my car for 13 years in this county and haven’t been keyed yet. (knocks on wood)
13County Commissioners Court was described by one of their own, Tom Bass, as the last stronghold of the spoils system in the State of texas.
14JJ, take as long as you want to say what’s in your heart. Read the whole piece. Unbelievable.
15Excellent writing, J.J. ~ Don’t know how lawyers are in Texas, but normally there are lawyers on both sides of issues – civil, criminal & political. I’ve worked with some great lawyers & with some real doozies, but most are just trying to make a living like everyone else to support their families & their communities. The good ones know who the bad ones are in every community.
16‘the county attorney, Republican Doyle “Dee” Hobbs, Jr., is apparently not qualified to handle “representing the county.” ‘
I thought I was becoming jaded but even I had to read that twice. These voters seem to excel at pulling the lever for a bunch of dipwads and then ignoring everything they do afterwards.
Can the local Dems edit this well-written story down to a few sentences and then yell it real loud before the next election?
17I worked at Ft Bend County long enough to realize what a corupt mess the entire county government system is. What happens is that a young person gets hired by the county, if they are intelligent they eventually move on to a higher paying job in the private sector, if they are lazy and not so bright they stay at the county for 20 or 30 years and get promoted during that time to way above their abilities.
18Every department at the county has a budget, if you don’t spend all of your budget it gets cut. So at the end of every fiscal year there is a mass spending frenzy. We had more high tech goodies that we had no use for than anywhere I have ever worked. One of my jobs was to make things looked used before they went to auction.
Your tax dollars at work.
So wait. You think Democrat’s would appoint someone who is pro-life? Who is anti-gay marriage? It is crazy that Constables are elected positions. But since they are, do you really claim that Democrats in a Democrat county would accept a pro-life anti-gay appointee to an interim slot that has to run for re-election?
BTW. Interviewing for a political appointment is not the same as interviewing for a job.
19DJ, Bless your heart. What the hell? You think constables shouldn’t be elected? Constables carry guns, can bang down doors, and can give you a speeding ticket. They sure the hell need to be responsible to someone. I know police chiefs aren’t elected in Texas because mayors appoint them. You don’t like the police chief? Vote out the mayor. It takes 8 to 12 years to vote out a commissioner court because of staggered terms. That’s a long time to have a crazy constable. So you want them appointing a constable who never has to face voters? If you do, this is what you get. Someone’s unemployed brother in law who is a radical rightwing ideologue.
Power to the people, DJ.
Plus, I think Democrats understand that a constable doesn’t perform weddings or provide female healthcare. We’re real smart that way.
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