Texas Congressvarmint Louie Gohmert is talking about sex today.  That rarely even makes the news because Louie finds a way to talk about sparkin’ almost every day.

He was on the electric radio talking about sex education and said that we don’t need it because kids will find out about it all on their own.

You know, you combine physics with biology and some hydraulics and Newton’s rarely talked about 14th law and you have some backseat hoochy koochie just like Adam and Eve figured it out.

… mankind has existed for a pretty long time without anyone ever having to give a sex-ed lesson to anybody. And now we feel like, oh gosh, people are too stupid to unless we force them to sit and listen to instructions. It’s just incredible.

Yep, you need to learn about s-e-x out behind the barn like Louie did.  That, of course, is where Louie also learned about everything else.

But you cannot have an ice cream sex-sundae without a cherry on top, so Louie found a way to weave in communist Russia to sex education.

And it reminds me so much of the summer that I was an exchange student in the Soviet Union back in the Seventies and I was shocked when they were saying ‘no, the children don’t belong to parents, they belong to the state.’ And if any parent said anything in front of their children negative about the wonderful Soviet Union, then we will take their children away and give them to somebody more deserving. And I just thought how horribly shocking that was, that of course parents were the ones who love the children, not the state. And I thought thank God that we don’t have that in our country.

Could somebody please translate that into English for me?

You know that’s the thing about Louie.  You always know which way his pickle is gonna squirt – sex and Soviets.  He’ll work that into everything.

He also claims that he heard a woman on MSNBC say, “hey, children belong to the state”.   No, actually, Louie, that was Uncle Si.

Thanks to Warner and Frank for the heads up.