North By Southwest
You’ve heard by now that that North Korea has Austin, Texas, on their nuclear target list.
Our buddy Harold Cook has his take on it (prepare yourself for a few Austin insider jokes). (Okay, I said the whole “Austin insider” thing because I am deeply jealous that there are only three people who “get” Richmond, Texas, insider jokes.)
I suspect Kim Jong-un wants to take out his main competition in The World’s Dumbest Evil Leader.
Check this out: Rick Perry says he completely understands why Kim picked Austin. It’s because Austin is truly “a very important city.”
Asked about North Korea’s decision to single out the relatively small city of Austin, known more for college parties and music festivals than for political power, he said he’s treating it as a “very real threat.” While he wouldn’t speculate as to whether North Korea has the missile capability to reach Austin, Perry did show some sense of pride that the city found itself on the “Very Important American Cities” list.
Oh dear Lord, Rick Perry takes Kim Jong-un very seriously. And himself. Rick Perry takes himself very seriously. That makes two of them.
I ain’t scared of no nuke. However, THAT scares me. A lot. I say just let them meet somewhere and duke it out.
Given that everything Rick Perry does undermines Austin and its values, he has some damn nerve pretending he thinks we’re important. And that guy in North Korea is crazy, too.
1As a former aggie cheer leader Perry is probably offended that College Station wasn’t listed as a target.
2Perry wants his own nuke-lee-air bomb and is jealous that the lshort, young, fat guy in North Korea is getting more attention than him.
3Personally, I think it the natural fear evil doers have of bats.
4We have more to worry about with Perry as the governor than we do with a short fat guy in North Korea.
5Those last two Rick Perry stories put my brain in “stuck” for the day. I’m going back to bed.
Good Grief.
6Look for Perry to have “official business” somewhere about 3000 miles away. You don’t think he’s going to stay around as a target, do you?
7He probably thinks he can shoot it out of the sky. With his coyote killin’ sidearm.
8I think little Kim is trying to swing the basketball pool for next March Madness by destroying the Longhorn team…
9I am far more worried about Perry than I am about North Korea.
10Thanks for the shout-out! We’re still holding up ok here in Austin. The beer and barbecue seem to be holding out, and supply lines remain open while we keep a sharp eye out for the North Koreans.
11I’m happy to see Austin will be prepared for the coming North Korean nuclear onslaught, but since the NK ‘ICBM’ is actually a 3-stage SCUD missile the very safest place to be is wherever they’ve got it aimed. And the survivalist list looks just about right for tailgating. Is that a coincidence?
12I’m not sure. But I think the crazy guy from North Korea, is jealous of Rick ……. Goodhair…… Perry.
I think if someone gave the crazy guy a good hair cut, he might feel some better about himself, and not so inclined to nuke people.
You have to admit…… He needs a good barber or stylist.
Aside from that…… not a whole lot we can do about a blustering dictator, who does a whole lot of talking he can’t back up.
Darn, we had this Korea thing in the 60’s or so. Why are we doing it again. I not only think he’s not going go “nuke” Austin, I don’t think he’s going to nuke anybody.
Maybe the Pacific Ocean. Aside from that. Nada.
I can see why he and Dennis Rodman hit it off. Dennis is a showman, also.
13Has Rick Perry ever “Totally Understood” anything…… in his entire miserable life?
I don’t think so.
14We in Austin have this well in hand. First we’re going to airdrop breakfast tacos and “Keep North Korea Weird” bumper stickers from one end of the country to the other. That will be followed by a wave food trailers, some of which will sell barbecue that you have to wait two hours in line for and sell out at ten thirty in the morning. If that doesn’t make them capitulate, a division of indie rock bands is ready to parachute in for an ACL Live prevue. Our weapon of last resort would be moving the Texas Relays to Pyongyang, but we don’t want to wish that on anyone.
15Love ya Juanita. Some funny comments too. I had similar thoughts but decided that it’s not worth losing Austin no matter how much I loathe Rick Perry
16I was on a finding out about North Korea tear right before all this posturing started.. The most moving story was of a young man who escaped the concentration camp he was born into that tortured him and he had to watch his mother and brother die in…the driving factor that led him to escape? He wanted to taste chicken. His entire life he had lived on two scoops of corn, sometimes some cabbage and rats, when you could catch them. Texas BBQ would have them swarming the borders (although getting upset tummies from the richness)
17Maybe we could send them Gov goodhair as a prisoner, get some deserving youngling out in an exchange? I know Perry wouldn’t be missed, and the child would have a chance at having a full tummy and miss out on the serious health problems from malnutrition (cataracts at age 7) just sayin’
I’m just surprised that Perry isn’t demanding that a wall be built around Austin.
18The Governaught has some ‘splainin’ to do about that Very Important American Cities list which includes Austin. Guess he doesn’t understand its a nuclear HIT LIST!
19My first thought on hearing that Austin was on the hit list was that it wanted to take out our semiconductor industry. After California, I think we have the biggest “silicon valley” in the western hemisphere. That makes for big competition for China, NK’s backers (and for SK’s Samsung).
FYI – I’ve been trying to buy some new scissors for the house. Been looking for a couple of months now. Haven’t managed to find any yet that didn’t say “Made in China,” even Fiskars. Our trade deficit is high enough. I try not to buy anything made in China, especially for children.
Just my two cents.
20