Mixed Messages

January 18, 2013 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Right after Attorney General Greg Abbott sent a welcome to Yankees to come on down to Texas, the owner of a bank in Chappell Hill took in the welcome mat.

Ed Says, "Damn Yankees!"

A bank in the small Texas town of Chappell Hill is inviting customers to bring in concealed handguns because it has been robbed five times, “all of them by Yankees.”

“You never know who’s sitting in this bank,” Chappell Hill Bank President Ed Smith told KHOU. “If you’re coming in to rob it, I think you’re going to be in a world of hurt.”

Maybe Ole Banker Ed needs needs to stock up on confederate currency.

And Banker Ed is a bit of a political problem solver, too.

The bank president also suggested that new gun control laws were not the way to prevent mass shootings like the one at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut.

“Everybody wants the government to do something,” Smith opined. “People need to do things for themselves.”

Yeah, come to think of it, those kids in Sandy Hook did a pretty poor job of taking care of themselves.

Thanks to Irene for the heads up.

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0 Comments to “Mixed Messages”


  1. Don A in Pennsyltucky says:

    I wonder if his bank is FDIC insured and regulated by the federal office of the currency controller. I expect that he doesn’t care for all those rules and regulations that are intended to keep him from lending all the deposits to his wife.

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  2. Good one, Don A.

    Banker Ed, what you don’t know about how to prevent school shootings–or bank robberies–would fill your vault to overflowing.

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  3. Ralph Wiggam says:

    Based on the information he offers so candidly, I would drive 6 or 8 blocks out of my way to avoid his bank. It sounds like it could turn into a free-fire zone at the drop of a hat.

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  4. Chappell Hill Bank – “We don’t try to aim higher than other banks. We get our customers to aim lower.”

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  5. So the robbers–armed with guns, I’m sure–enter the bank with guns out, ready to attack. One or more armed customers will then draw and, if they aren’t shot dead first, fire and hope they hit the right people and not another customer or someone out in the street. When the police arrive they will see a whole bunch of people with guns, all dressed in civilian clothes.

    Yeah, what could go wrong with this plan.

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  6. Sam in Kyle says:

    Pretty sure someone like Ed doesn’t want any of the nearby Prairie View A&M students doing business there either.

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  7. barbinbastrop says:

    I wonder if Abbott and all the 2nd Amendment shouters would feel comfortable if all those people of any color other than white that live in New York were to load up with assault weapons and lots of ammo and move to Texas?

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  8. The term “Yankee” is defined regionally. Here in Vermont a Yankee is an old family person probably who’s family moved up here before the Revolutionary war. When I first moved to Texas I was called a Yankee , though my family had not come over (From Italy) until the late 1800’s, it was a better alternative to what I was called up North; Dago, WOP, Guinia, but it was not said to me in friendly terms. As in “You dress like a Yankee!”.
    So just who was robbing the bank? People of Mayflower stock? or just someone who came from above the Mason-Dixon line? the latter I suspect. How did they know?

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  9. Yankee changes with local. In Galveston it is applied to anyone from north of the causeway. Yumpin Yimminee Banker Ed is a yankee.

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  10. They said, “Stickem up ya bahstids!”

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  11. @MCPO Ret, they were held up by some guys from “Southie” aka south Boston???

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  12. Apparently, Texas has more Yankees, than we do here in Maryland, I am forever getting cutoff by New Yorkers, Ohioans, Texans, and Floridians- but only occasionally get stuck behind a rusty Subaru with Vermont or Massachusetts plates. And most of our crime is home grown, we seem to be self sufficient in that. Whether it is an export crop I cannot tell, ‘The Wire’ seems to argue that it doesn’t travel well.

    I think that that is because Swamp Yankees are more reserved, quiet, private type of crime people. They, commit their crime down the lane, jacking deer, cooking meth, to feed their families or habits. They are ENTERPRISE criminals, rather than spree or solo criminals.

    BTW, Connecticut, New York, and Rhode Island do not harbor or produce Yankees. They produce their own special breeds of people, but Yankees are now extinct in these regions, only the Bay State, North and East, has Yankees. I recommend reading the ‘Beans of New Egypt’ to clarify the definition.

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  13. My God! Please check the water down there. Hurry!!!

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  14. @Maggie: Won’t do any good.

    The damage has already been done.

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