Texas Governor Rick Perry is just a shiver looking for a spine to run up.

At least that’s what Juanita Jean thinks.

Today we learn the sad news that Rick’s rented Gov Shack is costing the taxpayers $10,000 a month in rent alone.  It has 5 bedrooms and 7 bathrooms.

“Of course it has 7 bathrooms,” Juanita says with some degree of shock that people wouldn’t already know that.  “It has to have 7 bathrooms because Rick Perry is full of poop.”

“And 5 bedrooms are needed because he’s in bed with so many lobbyists.  Gee wiz, people, give the man a break.  If he didn’t use the money saving technique of making lobbyists share bedrooms, he’d have to live in a dorm.”

But, that’s not all –

His 6,386-square-foot rental sits on more than three acres and was advertised in 2007 for sale at $1.85 million. Perry’s state-paid expenses at the home include $18,000 for “consumables” such as household supplies and cleaning products, $1,001.46 in window coverings from upscale retailer Neiman Marcus, a $1,000 “emergency repair” of the governor’s filtered ice machine, a $700 clothes rack, and a little over $70 for a two year subscription to Food & Wine Magazine.

“Y’all, I can agree that maybe, just maybe, Food and Wine Magazine might be a little tiny bit of an unnecessary taxpayer expense, but an ice machine is not a luxury in this Texas heat.  It is not.  I know how upset I get when someone doesn’t refill the ice cube trays so I can see how the Gov would need to hire people to come over and fill the trays and run them up to Alaska so they’ll freeze super quick and then fly them back to Texas, hoping they don’t melt in Arizona  ….. wait, it’s a machine doing it?  never mind.”

By the way, you can buy a whole brand new ice machine that makes and stores a half a ton of ice for $730.  If you need more ice than that, you’re drinking too much.

“So, there stands Governor Rick Perry, grinning from his butt to his eyebrows, living like he won the lottery.  I have one thing to say about the Gov’s new digs,” Juanita concludes, “if he can’t afford it, we can’t afford it.”