Yeah, And You Have To Kill Somebody As An Initiation Rite
It’s Jesus on a cracker again.
Keller, Texas, which is between Fort Worth and Flower Mound, got themselves a revival going on called “Deliver Us From Evil.’ No, seriously, there’s apparently a whole Mess O’ Evil in Keller. I don’t know what it is, and most likely I don’t wanna know.
Dr. Gary Cass Delivering Evil
So they bussed in an evangelist who is a former Executive Committee member of San Diego’s Republican Party. I don’t know this for a fact, but I suspect he’s passing himself off as an expert in the blossoming field of evil, you know, what with that California connection. His name is Dr. Gary Cass and he runs something called the Christian Anti-Defamation League, where I suspect my name is enshrined in the Hall of Fame, or soon will be.
Anyway, Dr. Cass got himself wound up giving a sermon to the sinners in Keller, Texas, and little spittle things started running down the sides of his mouth and he began speaking in tongues and stuff and shouted hallelujah praise guns.
No, seriously.
Cass blasted “progressive Christians” for abandoning “God’s word for Marxist liberation theology and in doing so have murdered their own souls.”
“By the way, I’ve got a whole sermon, you can’t be a Christian if you don’t own a gun,” he added. “That preaches in Texas, don’t it?”
“You have not just a right not bear arms, you have a duty.
Yep, just like Sweet Jesus.
Thanks to Brian for the heads up.
Hey, Juanita Jean, if it’s not too late, you might want to suggest to your many fans that they need to get their early votes in on the East Coast. It’s going to be ugly when those storms hit…much too close to election day.
1So why did they have to bus in a preacher from Cali? Couldn’t find one crazzzy enough in Texas? I find that hard to believe. I’m sure old Louie Gomert knows a few.
BTW, what kind of gun did Jesus carry?
2Jesus had a gun?
3The Prince of Peace? …wants you to carry a gun?
I guess the ONLY place the ten commandments are important is on public property. They certainly don’t carry a lot of weight once they leave the courthouse.
4Lorraine, I believe it was this one: http://datingjesus.files.wordpress.com/2009/07/v3.jpg
5Well this one certainly got me! Especially @ Ralph Wiggam and @ RA you guys gave me some good grins. Thanks, I needed that.
6It would almost be worth getting rid of the evil in the world just to shut these guys up. Of course the catch lies in their definition of “evil,” which is often what other people call “fun” or even “sexy.”
7Their “Good Book” must have the “Turn the other cheek” part redacted.
8@LynnN: You could never get rid of all the “evil” to shut these guys up. If people decided pulling weeds or digging ditches was the next best thing to sex or chocolate, these idiots would be ranting against them.
9Thanks, RA!
10Also, Christian Anti-defamation League?! They must have a different definition of defamation than I do because they’re doing a damn good job of defaming Christians all by themselves.
11Ah, the Google . . . .
There’s a bio of this idiot on the League’s webite, and it says he has “advanced” degrees from Westminster Theological Seminary, who’s web site notes the four *masters* degrees they offer. No Ph. D.
Maybe he got his doctorate from the NRA.
12But think how difficult it must be for the poor man to go through life with a small, discolored, furry creature attached to his upper lip. Really, enough to drive anybody crazy.
13You gotta know, if this guy is an “evangelist” he’s also a Republican.
So, they had to bring him to the state, which has probably more guns than people…….to unload his bullsh* t. (Sorry Momma).
I don’t think, our Lord, Jesus Christ……. carried a Glock.
BTW, if you want to have some fun, and shake some up some folks…… hop on over to “The Republican Party of Louisiana” website, and leave a comment or two…..
http://www.facebook.com/lagop
My daughter, working in Lake Charles, thinks she has to “like” these idiots.
14San Diego my blue behind – you know he’s gotta be from Lubbock…
15So that line about turning the other cheek was a mistranslation? It should have been “empty the other chamber.”
16Wayull, as a good ol’ boy lawyer told me onct, us here in Tayuksis believe in defending our own selves. I jist cain’t remember rightly where Ah put my firearm.
17Don’t repent, reload?
18Lorriane, you’re welcome!
Y’all, I have been a thinkin’ and a studyin’ on this here ee-vangelist and his version of the Holy Bible and I’ve about done decided his must the Buy-bull cause the Jesus in mine ain’t never said nothin like ‘at.
“Dr.” Gary, your name should be spelled C(r)ass. Jesus wasn’t just progressive, he was liberal. I’m proud to try to follow that example.
19Thanks you guys…love your comments, put a smile on my face today–I’ve been in bed sick for days, so I’m glad I stopped by…
20As an official “Christed” Ju-Bu, I find these type of people awful, not to mention that they give my beloved California a bad name…
Vote, Vote, Vote
That’s all we have (except for our witty comebacks)
Don’t repent, reload–good one, I’m stealing that, Chiptser!
Is that ‘C’ in Crass a silent ‘c’?
21Where did that “r” come from? I did not mean for it to be there.
22OK, Gary Cass! Was baby Jesus born with a gun in his hands?
23Here in Georgia there is a big fuss going on about a law that says guns are allowed in church–and there shouldn’t be a law against that.
Me–I favor freedom of religion. Anyone who wants to worship guns–ok. Bring ’em to church, bow down before ’em–who cares?
To each his own.
24OldMayfly: And they need to bring guns to church… why, exactly…? Or are guns like cell phones to most people– they can’t imagine leaving them in the car?
——-
As someone said, you know you made up your god when he hates all the same people you do.
25As a former Catholic, I’m just astounded by whatever theology the “Christians” follow. Just because I’ve rejected Catholicism doesn’t mean I’m buying what these folks are selling. Maybe I’ve read too many of Elaine Pagels books. They make you wonder about just about everything anybody is selling. None of which conforms with the earliest writings about Jesus.
26thanks, Juanita and all of the witty commentors. I agree with you all, and you make me smile…Now how good is that.
27It’s all in the Babble. http://www.evilbible.com/Murder.htm
28I have another idea. If someone wants to shoot this guy, he should accept the bullet as a “gift from God” like a child conceived by rape.
29“I believe in an America where the separation of church and state is absolute–where no Catholic prelate would tell the President (should he be Catholic) how to act, and no Protestant minister would tell his parishioners for whom to vote–where no church or church school is granted any public funds or political preference–and where no man is denied public office merely because his religion differs from the President who might appoint him or the people who might elect him.”.
John F. Kennedy September 12, 1960, address to the Greater Houston Ministerial Association.
30In medieval days, men were supposed to leave their swords outside the church. (I saw a stave church in Norway where the sword rack was in the church porch.)
The things these bozos claim are Christian boggle the mind of this Christian. Gotta carry a gun, gotta kill your rebellious child, gotta turn your back on poor people…sure doesn’t sound like anything in the Gospels to me.
31I still think that most guys who feel like they have to carry a gun are compensating for a different small caliber weapon.
32