Texas Proud, Baby

July 16, 2012 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Okay, I hope you get to see all this because even my magic geek elves could not figure out how to post it on my website.

I want you to meet DaNae Couch, the new Miss Texas.  She is a perfectly lovely child and I am certain that she will represent the fine tradition Texas womanhood at the Miss America pageant.  I know that because her talent is baton twirling.

Only in Texas is a grown woman twirling a baton considered talent.

Let me make it clear that unlike a lot of feminists, I have nothing against beauty pageants.  Looking good is hard work. And they do have that all-important tough question section of the pageant.

And that is where DaNea excelled.  She, of course, does have the advantage of being a third year law student at Texas Tech University where, best I know, critical thinking skills have not been disallowed.

If you are on Facebook, you can see DaNea answer her question live and in person.  Her question was, “If you could change one thing in our political system, what would it be?”

For those you you who cannot see it, I offer this color commentary of her answer from a friend of mine who was there:

The question, which had been written by Miss East Texas and fished from a bowl, was “If you could change something in our political system, what would it be?”

She replied, “I think, especially with an upcoming election, the thing that I would change about our political system is the amount candidates are allowed to spend on campaigns?” (So far, so good; I interjected the question mark ’cause that’s how her voice sounded at the end of the sentence. She continued.) “Because I think, with the economy being the way it is, we have such a problem in our country with people being able to afford things. So I would like to see the candidates, instead of raising money to put into their campaigns, being able to raise money to give back to our country, where it belongs, and being able to focus on OUR people instead of themselves.”

Funny thing is, I might agree, altho’ I call that Communism.

It is reported that DaNea was wearing a dress that costs about the same as your average hotly contested congressional race while giving this answer.

I am also told that she kept dropping her baton during the talent section.  Personally, I think that was planned to show the judges that during the Miss America contest that Miss Oklahoma, who sings operas she wrote herself while wearing shoes she designed and cobbled, might just “happen” to slip and fall on a misplaced baton as she comes on stage and break a necessary body part for the competition.

I love yew, Texas.

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0 Comments to “Texas Proud, Baby”


  1. Sgt Mike in Commerce says:

    “There is no excellent beauty that hath not some strangeness in the proportion.”
    – Francis Bacon

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  2. Mz Patti says:

    So where is this Panhandle Princess from? And why is it that baton twirling is considered a talent? And is she a twirler for the Goin’ Band from Raiderland? Or did she just resurrect this talent from high school while trying to pay for law school, and realized she was pretty cute, had a talent from dropping batons, and decided to compete for a scholarship? I don’t know. This is pretty lame…. realize I’ve had several girlfriends from my hometown compete for Miss Texas over the years, but the further I got from them, the more I realized this is simply the grown up version of Toddlers in Tiaras. UGH.

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  3. *grin*
    I first read Miss Texas’ talent as “bacon” twirling.
    Even though I caught my mistake in about 3 seconds, I couldn’t read through the post without thinking “bacon twirling.” No, it’s worse than that because I kept VISUALIZING her doing her fancy-schmancy bacon twirling in her lovely yellow gown.

    Bacon (and baton twirling) will never be the same for me again…. 😉

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  4. Juanita Jean says:

    Sister Artemis, bacon twirling should definitely be an Olympic sport.

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  5. I did baton twirling (believe it or not….. in high school…. with two batons with lights on each end)….

    Heck…… I coulda..(woulda, shoulda)…….. been a Miss Texas thing-a-ma-bob.

    Are you sure this qualifies as a “talent”.???….. cause I just thought of it as something to do ……. because I belonged to the drill team. Darn. I have a “talent” I never knew about. Look away Momma… This is a talent about as useful as you know what on a Boar Hog.

    As an “Olympic Sport” you should have to do the thing with fire on each end of the darned thing.

    Only in Texas.

    What do you bet…… this little lady (from around West Texas way) thinks her “baton twirling” will get her further in life…… than a law degree???? Just sayin’

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  6. Now, now, now. It is a way to get a scholarship. Sometimes you gotta go for it.
    I liked her answer.

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  7. Juanita Jean says:

    Miemaw, I think they had to cut out the twirling with fire on the ends of the batons during the big haired Aqua Net days. Lots of unfortunate accidental mohawks.

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  8. Wait a minute folks. I was a baton twirler in HS and it was darned hard work. It is a talent that requires exquisite hand/eye coordination, strength, courage (ever been hit with an errant baton?), and creativity. I’m not sure if you commenting folks are making fun or not, but this young woman may eventually be part of the solution to get us out of this crazy world!

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  9. Don A in Pennsyltucky says:

    I used to love the Miss Texas Pageant broadcast. My favorite talent was ventriloquism — the contestant who had a dummy that also had a dummy and the dummy’s dummy would talk while the dummy drank water. I think that contestant made the finals twice but didn’t win either time.

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  10. Juanita Jean says:

    Jan, Honey, I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. I was a baton twirler, too, as was almost every girl in Texas in the late 1950’s. Then we burned our bras. I don’t know if that had anything to do with baton konks to the head or not, but that seems like a plausible excuse as any.

    I just don’t think it’s the answer to world peace, nor do I think her answer that political campaigns should become a canned food drive is realistic. I agree that too much money is spent in politics, but don’t you think she’s kinda suggesting vote buying? She’s a third year law student, fergoodnesssake, so you’d think she’d know about Citizen’s United. If I give a candidate $10, why should he have to give it to you? What if I don’t like you? I mean, if she’s all for redistribution of wealth, that’s cool, but I don’t think that’s what she meant.

    So sorry if I hurt the feelings of any other grown up women who baton twirl over at the nursing homes to bring joy to sick people. I’m mean. I am.

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  11. Sam in Kyle says:

    Given the tightness of her dress, I think bending over and picking up the baton adds points to her performance.

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  12. Kate oDubhagain says:

    Years ago a beauty contestant did a roller skate routine to Amazing Grace, for her talent competions. Don’t recall if she won, but she had to have been from the South. It was right …nice.

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  13. JJ, you didn’t hurt my feelings. I didn’t read her comments as you did, but one reason I really like this website is that I learn so much. I’m highly educated, (lots of book-larning) but not when it comes to the political arena. I’ve even been moved several times to donate to the Dems – first time I’ve ever done that!
    Put my denseness down to the fact that I bought a new car today, replacing my 10-year-old faithful Taurus. Major angst from my tendency to anthropomorphize my cars!
    So feel free to correct me anytime!

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  14. Joe in Erie, PA says:

    You have to wonder what the “talent” of some of the losers was for sure.

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  15. rubymay says:

    I’m not a fan of “beauty contests.” Nope, sorry, I think they’re just “christian” burlesque shows. And It’s pretty apparent that Donald Trump’s show is rigged from the beginning (as most of them are). But for those of you who do have a baton twirling talent — good for you!!! I wish I could twirl a baton, but I can’t. I really mean it — good for you!

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  16. As always, I love the comments. But I really want a “like” button for them, so all you left-leaners in deep Tejas can get instant feedback for your own talents.

    Ever since my good pal Molly died, I have waited patiently for the vacuum to be filled; Juanita Jean ’bout does it for me. Plus, she’s going to Charlotte as a power Dem, so I feel like a little bit of me is right there too.

    Kick ass for me, Juanita Jean!

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  17. So, here’s my Texas Beauty Pageant story…I was in high school…..this was around l962…we had the first ever Miss Something or Other Pageant….( I assume winners went regionally then state wide?). I was at a dress rehearsal because someone had asked me to play the piano for something……I can’t remember what…..it wasn’t for a contestant. So, I’m seeing all these girls and their “talents” for the first time. Well out comes Betty Mae What’s Herface (I sincerely can’t remember who it was….which is STRANGE!)……and on the bad, scratchy phonograph, they’re playing (as background music) I ENJOY BEING A GIRL (from Rodger’s & Hammersteins FLOWER DRUM SONG)….”When I have a brand new hair–do…and my eyelashes all in curl….I float like the clouds on air-do…I enjoy being a girl…yes, I’m that gay…. I knew that by heart).

    So, what is the talent? She’s not singing, she’s not dancing, she’s….she’s…….PACKING A SUITCASE!
    I spit out my Delaware Punch!

    “It’s important that you fold yore clothes neatly when you pack….etc. etc. ”

    I was almost hysterical. And I was the ONLY one in the auditorium who found this even remotely amusing. I think it was at that moment that I thought: I gotta get outta this state.

    J

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