And, Boy Howdy, Ain’t We Proud!
Contrary to what you’ve read, Texas is not dead last. We are dead first.
No, no, even worse than last. Out of 50 states, Texas comes in 51st in the delivery of health care. Seriously. Washington DeeCee beat us. We have to look up to see last place.
I don’t know about the rest of you guys but I would like to personally thank Rick Perry, Greg Abbott, Karl Rove, and the entire cast of the Texas Republican Party for this amazing honor.
We are also proud to announce that the same friendly folks who gave us last place are also going to turn down billions in federal assistance for Medicaid because they would rather you be sick than they be wrong.
“Our office is reviewing the study, but at first glance it appears to be an extremely broad report that goes well beyond the parameters of the state Medicaid program and doesn’t take into account our diverse population,” Catherine Frazier, press secretary for Gov. Rick Perry, said in a statement.
Frazier said Texas will “continue to fight the federal government for more flexibility to address our health care challenges, which is crucial to effectively improving our health care system.”
So what Catherine is saying is that “Damn, this report covers a whole lot of stuff that we don’t like to think about and I forgot to read the section on blacks and Hispanics because, y’all, this report has a freekin’ lot of words and my lips don’t move that fast. Plus, we are not going to take federal money because we do not want to be like other states. You know, healthy. We’d rather be dead last. Or maybe dead first is what I mean. Tee hee hee. I made a funny.”
Thanks to Carl and Kyle for the heads-up.
“an extremely broad report that goes well beyond the parameters of the state Medicaid program and doesn’t take into account our diverse population…”
Uh, yeah – I’m taking that to mean that the people who can afford to go to the Texas Medical Center are supposed to get double credit somehow, and that it’s really more economical to let the serfs just use folk medicine because their bodies don’t respond the same way.
1In this case “more flexibility” means “give us all that fed money and we’ll spend it however we want. Perry needs a new hat, darn it.” Unfortunately for that notion the ACA specifies actual Medicaid coverage in order to get the money.
Note also that the ACA contains some revenue-producing elements to pay for the expansion. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Patient_Protection_and_Affordable_Care_Act–see Summary of Funding)
These fees apply to pharmaceutical manufacturers and importers, medical equipment manufacturers, high-income earners, etc. State residents and companies have to pay them regardless of what the states do. So residents of Texas may get to help pay for the expansion in other states.
2Maybe just dead.
3Last year, while in the hospital after a horrendous horse wreck, I found out that here in Delta County (Texas) the income limit for families without children or disabled dependents applying for Medicaid is $169/month. I certainly didn’t qualify because my husband is retired and gets SS.
We’re SO fifty years ago!
Doesn’t look like they want me to be covered by the ACA, either.
4Sorry, JJ. I know you look for witty, funny stuff from your readers. But this piece makes me sad & angry. Didn’t know when I moved here how much worse than Mississippi some state policies would be. I wish the “dead first” fellows would be the rich bozos who design state policies, rather than the poor citizens without health care services.
5from my tiny exam room in north east Texas…
/begin rant
My college roommie/lifelong best friend and I have (nearly) come to blows over this, healthcare. Here is my bottom line, disease, TB, measles, a sniffle, makes no distinction as to the person it attacks. It does not look one up and down and say, oh a fairly healthy white guy better leave him alone. Disease looks for an opportunity and multiplies.
Texans should not be proud of the state of their healthcare. This scorecard is merely the latest evidence of systemic failure.
6from my tiny exam room in north east Texas…
off topic by a mile….
7@MaryK Croft: Is Miller pharmacy there in Cooper still open?
All y’alls down in Texas must be tough or there wouldn’t be so many still alive and being mean. Or is the excess of mean coming from the well-off crowd who aren’t sick?
8Sad. Just plain sad.
9This is brought to you by those who will not soil their lily white hands preventing old people and infants from dying to defend the Republican Party. These folks can’t possibly believe in God’s judgement or they wouldn’t act like such clods.
10This is the best argument as to why healthcare should not be entrusted to the states. There are too many cruel people running the states – cruel and self-absorbed, greedily lining their own pockets.
Federal programs may have glitches, but by in large, they are consistent in how they apply to individual citizens. States like Texas which boast being part of the “Bible Belt” ought to be ashamed. Seems as if Perry and the GOTP are using that belt to beat its most needy citizens to literal death. Citizen abuse should be a federal crime.
BTW, our Kansas Governor – Sam Brownback- seems to have a bromance crush on Rick Perry. He is emulating him on so many programs and trying to outdo him in others so that Kansas citizens will be just as bruised and battered as Texans. Perry and Brownback – the political sadists of our generation (though others like Walker and Scott could be added into their little club), they seem to be taking the lead.
11Mike, I don’t hang out in Cooper much, but I believe it is. Still advertises milkshakes made the old fashioned way. SE corner of the Square.
Rodeo’s this weekend and it looks like my son will be riding both a bull and a saddle bronc. I don’t know if I want to watch. It’s not at all like watching a stranger (and he’s uninsured, too, at least until Texas picks up on the ACA money!)
12to MaryK, thanks for info
13to MaryK son: “let ‘er buck!”
Wow. Texas’ health care delivery is so poor that apparently we’ve infected our neighbors New Mexico, Oklahoma and Arkansas.
Kudos to Louisiana for edging out West Virginia.
14The religious right wants to define all fetuses as people. Maybe you guys in Texas need to define all people as fetuses so the religious right will fight hard to protect you and your right to life.
15I was so impressed that I went to the Governor’s official website and congratulated him on getting back the trophy for the country’s craziest state. He beat out Arizona, South Carolina, Kansas, Arkansas, Alabama, ALL of them! Ya gotta be proud.
Well, of course, I don’t live there, so there won’t be a response, but I think we should all offer our congratulations. Who really knows when the trophy will be awarded elsewhere? Lord knows the next education (or lack thereof) trophy could end up anywhere. Congratulate Rick while he still holds the trophy.
16It was sickening yesterday to hear that the lady who was crying at the Obama rally because her sister had died unable to get health insurance on account of having cancer.
17The right have no shame, they are attacking her in a dreadful way, I cannot imagine we live in the same world as the right wing, what happened to them, they are just evil people with no compassion.
“Diverse population” — that’s Nellie talk for “po’ folks.” I’m surprised they don’t tell them to go to a veterinarian.
18Is it possible that any of these morannic imbeciles can still “walk the streets” in public in Texas? I know they are ho’s, but can they actually go out in public? Alone?
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