Who you gonna believe, me or your lyin’ eyes?

The reclusive, super-wealthy Republican donor Harold Simmons sat down for an interview with the Wall Street Journal in which he explained why he decided to donate $18 million to conservative super PACs. To put it bluntly: he despises and fears President Barack Obama.

“Any of these Republicans would make a better president than that socialist, Obama,” Simmons told the Journal, in what is the piece’s most provocative quote. “Obama is the most dangerous American alive … because he would eliminate free enterprise in this country.”

How much difference is there between “a reclusive” and “a loner making bombs in the basement?”

Harold, Darlin’, you really do need to get out more.

But, on the upside, at least now they’re admitting that President Obama is an American.