Lacking enough votes to open an impeachment “inquiry” by multiple House committees, Kevin McCarthy opened it by fiat today, under mutinous pressure from the Crazy MAGA wing of what’s left of the GOP.  I actually burst out laughing at his reasoning when he said,

“House Republicans have uncovered serious and credible allegations into President Biden’s conduct.  Taken together, these allegations paint a picture of a culture of corruption.”

“Allegations.”  “A culture of corruption.” Right now all the red Irony Lights are flashing and Hypocrisy Sirens are howling.  Without a vote, McCarthy is trying to keep his job by feeding the alligators that are threatening to devour him if he doesn’t do TFG’s bidding.  Remember that TFG is the guy impeached twice for extortion of a foreign government and insurrection, under indictment for 91 felonies, liable for sexual assault and defamation, being sued for massive financial fraud in New York, and who had his “charitable” foundation shut down for fraud.  Add that to his history of screwing investors and contractors, friendship with child sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein, lusting after young girls, and stuffing his pockets with other people’s money, and you have the actual walking, talking textbook example of corruption.

But, hey, let’s go after Biden after a 5 year full on effort to dig dirt on him without unearthing one credible shred of evidence, just to placate the actual criminal.

I say, bring it on.  The shit show will be epic.

I am told this is just outside Lewisville, but it could be anywhere in Texas.

We don’t mind that he’s a whore.  It’s a job requirement in Texas.  It’s the skanky part we have a problem with.

And the trial goes on today.

Get your pencils out because The Last Guy is leading the battle for intellectual excellence.

No, seriously.

Hell, Honey, I’ll challenge either one of them to a multiplication test.  Or a second grade arithmetic test. Or two-footed hop scotch, can they do hop scotch?

I do not know why he picked Rupert Murdoch, but I am kinda surprised he could remember his name.  Let’s be honest here – beating Rupert at mental acuity is kinda like challenging Sweet Pea to a fight while Popeye is standing right there.

“Girls will be boys and boys will be girls
It’s a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world, except for Lola.” — Ray Davies

The line above came from Lola by the Kinks. You could say that Ray Davies was ahead of his time, but he really wasn’t. Others had blazed that ground before. In this tale, a young narrator (we can presume Davies) is in a bar when he meets up with a transvestite named “Lola”. It seems simple enough right? It wasn’t the Kinks best hit, but it might be the most recognizable song they did when you ask fans of music today.

Of course, the irony is that the fossils in Washington and in the state houses were probably coming of age when that song was popular. Some of them may have even enjoyed it as a kid. Oh how soon we forget. I suppose that happens to all of us on some level. We often conveniently forget the things when we did when we were younger and that is especially true when it comes to our own children.

All of the talk of Democrats being pedophiles, groomers, and what not is based on two very cynical calculations. It is something they want you and I to think about and argue about. If we are arguing about this then we won’t necessarily see real opportunities for lasting change slip out of our grasp. It’s a parlor trick. The trouble is that grooming and pedophilia are loaded terms with very specific definitions. Q would have us believe that the entire Democratic party and half of Hollywood are pedophiles. We can’t seem to define these things anymore. Suddenly, someone that shows tolerance is a groomer or a pedophile. Yet, the man that literally said he wanted to have sex with his daughter is the guy that will free us from this pedophilia ring.

However, there is a more serious implication from these charges and one that some people honestly believe. There is a belief that this notion of transgender, transvestites, homosexual, bisexual, and general experimentation is somehow more prevalent now than at any time in history. If you ask people at the Trump rallies what percentage of people are transgender you will get some ludicrous responses. One gentlemen said it was 20 percent. If being gay, lesbian, bisexual, a transvestite, or transgender were all 100 percent choices then the fact that there are more of them would be proof of grooming. It would have to be that way right?

Except it is all a lie. Anyone that knows anyone on the LGTBQ+ spectrum knows it is a natural phenomenon and not really a choice. So, simply demonstrating tolerance and acknowledgement of who someone is is not grooming behavior. Furthermore, pedophilia is a specific thing. Gay people are not pedophiles as a general rule anymore than priests are. Again, it is a specific thing and needs to be treated as such.

The sinister thing about it all is that these poor people become targets. Suddenly, you realize there are all kinds of people to hate and absolutely none of them have anything to do with why we may be struggling. It truly is a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world, but it sure as hell isn’t Lola’s fault. She’s just a girl trying to have a good time.

Okay, so it’s official now. The New York Times reports that there’s an official letter —

Okay, I’m watching the Paxton trial. I know it’s of small interest to people from foreign states, but cracks in the MAGA wall are riding on Paxton’s bloated back.

To be honest, I have seen some bad lawyering in my day but Paxton’s lawyer Tony Buzbee just about blew the bottom out of awful yesterday afternoon. First of all, he shows up with a Don Trump spray tan – so orange that he can just go nakkid for Halloween next month. He got himself a slicked-backed hair cut straight out of The Godfathers, when a Peaky Blinders cut would have looked slightly less ridiculous.

And then Rusty Hardin, who used to be a helluva lawyer 20 years ago, appeared confused, disorganized, and – God forbid! – boring. He got scrambled up over his own exhibit numbers, and monotoned his way through witness testimony with all the skill of a morning talk show host interviewing Dinah Shore, which might have been more interesting only because she’s dead. He’s 81 years old – and those were hard years.

Texas Lt. Governor Dan Patrick is in charge of the circus and the clowns.  He he has to call recesses to go talk to his lawyers because he’s dumber than bean dip. He’s 74 years old, spritely by Texas legislature standards, but Honey, you just can’t cover up the bean dip part.

I gotta say this – I believe we are watching the painful last gasps of the straight white patriarchy. It’s about damn time. Old white men — hang it the hell up. You’re just making fools of yourself.

They got started 45 minutes late this morning, but they found a middle aged white woman to lead them all in prayer “in Jesus’ name.”

I’m talking a deep breath and drinking another cup of coffee to brace myself for today.

Paxton lawyer Tony Buzbee on the left. I’m serious. Compare his hands and his face. Dude, he ought to sue somebody for that.