Utah.

A 64 year old man accidentally shot himself in the abdomen while cleaning his Glock .45 caliber handgun, according to the Cache County Sheriff’s Office.

Michael Lee Lockhart told the police that he was cleaning his .45 caliber Glock.  He reassembled it and loaded it with a full magazine but can’t for hell figure out why it hates him enough to shoot him in the damn stomach.

Here’s my favorite part:

Investigators won’t file any charges in the shooting, calling it an “unfortunate accident.”

Okay, I can go with the accident part.  But unfortunate? Nah, not really.  After all, he did shoot himself.

So, it turns out, the Transition is not exactly going smoothly.  From the WSJ:

During their private White House meeting on Thursday, Mr. Obama walked his successor through the duties of running the country, and [Dat Guy] seemed surprised by the scope, said people familiar with the meeting. [Dat Guy’s] aides were described by those people as unaware that the entire presidential staff working in the West Wing had to be replaced at the end of Mr. Obama’s term.

I don’t mind so much that they’re unfamiliar with ALL the intricacies of the Federal Government. I do mind that none of them has ever watched a West Wing episode. Or Schoolhouse Rock.

There’s a song? This job is hard!

After meeting with [Dat Guy], the only person to be elected president without having held a government or military position, Mr. Obama realized the Republican needs more guidance. He plans to spend more time with his successor than presidents typically do, people familiar with the matter said.

Seventy years of blithering ignorance. I appreciate your attention to duty, Mr Last Real President For Awhile Obama, but do you really hope to change that in him in 70 days?

Okay, this is a heads-up to my friends in foreign states.

Donald Trump is considering appointing Sid Miller to his cabinet.  Yes, the same Sid Miller who called Hillary the C word, traveled to Oklahoma on the taxpayer’s dime to get a Jesus shot, appointed all his unqualified friends to state positions at bodacious salaries, and has a lifetime of screw-ups.

You know the Three Stooges?  With Sid you get all three packed into one. Plus, as an added bonus, he’d steal the gold out of a widow woman’s teeth.

But Sid loves him some Jesus. It remains unknown if Jesus returns the favor.

AN ASIDE:  We now have three typists (I hesitate to say writers) at the beauty salon. You know Primo and now we’re adding El Jefe. I have given them both free rein and will not censor either of them. El Jefe uses Momma-Unapproved language. He’s gonna try to not do that but I suspect his trying will run about as long as Chris Christie skipping dinner. I’ll let him because he is a colorful man.

I will be doing some more traveling with Bubba and I deeply appreciate these two guys keeping all 12 people who come to this site entertained.

WARNING (No really. It’s a warning.):  IF YOU ARE A LOYAL HILLARY SUPPORTER AND BELIEVED THAT SHE ONLY LOST THE ELECTION DUE TO NO FAULT OF HER CAMPAIGN OR HER OWN CONDUCT, AND WAS SOLEY A VICTIM OF MISOGYNY AND PREJUDICE AGAINST HER, PLEASE PASS OVER THIS POST.  TRUST ME. DON’T READ IT.  REALLY.  YOU WON’T LIKE IT. 

Since about 1 am on Wednesday morning I’ve been imbibing a remarkable volume of adult beverages and raging at anyone who’ll listen, including Juanita Jean, about the injustice of it all.  She has told me to get it off my chest, so here we go, like it or not. I’m wandering into a political minefield here, because I have things to say about Hillary, her campaign, and why I believe she lost the 2016 electoral vote to the worst candidate for the presidency in US history. And if you believe I’m a misogynist, you can stick that right where the sun don’t shine.  It ain’t so; I calls ’em as I sees ’em, and chromosome differences don’t count. All comments making that accusation will be deleted, no arguments. My advice in advance about this piece: Don’t like it?  Don’t read it.

(more…)

So, we are looking for a new DNC Chief.  The names that have floated to the top of my bucket are Keith Ellison, Martin O’Malley and Howard Dean.

I like all three.

Keith Ellison would be best because he’s Keith Ellison.  He came to my county to do a fundraiser for one of our candidates and and brought an upbeat, energy charged liberal message.  The downside is that he’s already got a job and you can recall the problems we had with Debbie Wasserman Schultz trying to be both a congressman and a DNC Chief.  His former Chief of Staff is one of my good friends and tells me that Keith is the real deal. However, the conflict of interest in fundraising concerns me.

Martin O’Malley might be the key to bringing white men back into the fold.  He’s funny, smart, warm, authentic, and progressive. Most importantly, he can do a full time job of the position and has no conflict of interest with fundraising. His Chief of Staff is also a good friend of mine and he has amazing political instincts and great outreach to the Asian community.

I also have no complaints about Howard Dean.

So far, I’m conflicted.  If you live in Texas, a list of the DNC members (who will elect the new Chairman) is here under the Senate Districts.  Their contact information is also included. Please contact them with your thoughts.

If you have a link to your committee members, please put it in the comments.

¡Buenos días!

I am happy to join Juanita Jean and her other Pals to Participate in Professional Political Punditry to Perpetrate Perpetual Prickly Publishing.  Having just joined, I thought I would use a few lines to introduce myself to you.  After a long career of pulling wrenches, brewing beer, baking bread, and cleaning windows, I started my punditry avocation about 10 years ago by ranting and raving on the internets about the sorry state of politics in the good ol’ US of A, and especially in Texas.  I started my ranting after the 2004 elections, raved through the 2008 cycle, which was bruising, and then continued, though not as publicly, to talk about holding politicians accountable to their obligations to the people as elected officials.  I have been dismayed at the failure of party politics, that apparently only exist (with a few notable exceptions) to benefit those in office.

Today, I live just up the road from the World’s Most Dangerous Beauty Salon and visit often, ranting and raving at Juanita Jean (especially since last Tuesday). After patiently listening to my hair-on-fire raging, recently Juanita finally said, “Don’t just tell it to me, tell it to everybody else.”  I thought, OK; so here we are.  In the coming days/weeks/whenever Juanita kicks me out, I’ll be sharing my thoughts as an independent thinker/screamer.  I’ll be talking about social justice, the fossilization of political parties, gerrymandering, the media, healthcare policy, education, energy policy, head in the sand environmental and climate change policy, the cancer of money in politics, and any other damn thing that pops into my head.  Thank you, Juanita Jean, for letting me talk to (yell at) your loyal customers.

To get us going, I’ve posted below a little about me personally.  See you shortly when I pull out the flamethrower.

EL JEFE El Jefe met Juanita Jean some years ago when he opened El Jefe’s Beer, Bread, and Pickle Emporium just up the road from the World’s Most Dangerous Beauty Salon. He savors anything made with his home grown yeast, but especially those things that go well with his South Texas Pucker Up & Slap Yo’ Knee Bread n’ Butter pickles, made especial for the Holidays and coming soon to an HEB near you.

A native Texan, El Jefe is proud to be the great-great grandson of Napoleon Bonaparte Fisher who joined the Texas Rangers in 1860. He was born in North Texas to a jen-u-wine Bible-thumping praise and glory preacher and to the daughter of a jen-u-wine Bible-thumping praise and glory preacher, receiving more Bible & ear lobe thumping before he was 6 than most are privileged to get in a lifetime. Because of his pure and crystal-clear upraising, he now practices his own spiritual tradition of worshiping every Sunday at Our Lady of the Perpetual Bloody Mary & New York Times. He was elected Deacon of the parish many years ago.

El Jefe rants regularly on social media, and is an equal opportunity insulter of all proclivities. He’s sure he’ll insult you, too, and likes to proclaim that he’s old enough to not care about what you think of him or his hand crafted pointy toed roach killer boots made way-the-hell-out-there in Fredericksburg just for him.

So there.