We just nominated the first woman for President from a major political party.  Welcome to 1966 (Indira Gandhi) and 1979 (Margaret Thatcher), America.

My friend Pam is a damn hoot.  Every convention night for the past two weeks she’s called me at about 11:00 and laughed about everything on the teevee.  Pam comes from a completely different background than I do and seeing the world through her eyes has made me a better person.

My favorite thing that Pam does is that she goes to register new voters at the Houston Naturalization ceremony.  She sent me these pictures this morning of brand spankin’ new Americans.

And her favorite one:

She registered every damn one of them!

Okay, do you remember the Freedom Kids who sang at one of the first Trump Rally?

Yeah, you could not forget that even if you tried like hell.

They were perfectly awful.

Awful appears to be the Donald Trump campaign slogan because he exploited them worse than their own parents did.

Jeff Popick, the creator behind the patriotic trio and father of the youngest member in the group, says he plans to sue Trump, alleging his campaign violated several verbal agreements and subsequently stiffed the group of proper monetary compensation.

Yeah, Trump did not pay them.

Girls!  Vote Democratic!

Thanks to Bryan for the heads up.

The Houston Chronicle (of all places!) has a kinda cool thing this morning called, “The Most Outrageous Things Mike Pence Has Said …”

There’s 15 of them and I’m sure you’ll find a favorite.  Mine?  Thank you for asking.

“Republicans, from George Washington to George W. Bush just have better ideas.”

Yes, like the idea that George Washington was a Republican or that George Bush ever had a good idea.

And, since I haven’t found an excuse to use this picture I’m just gonna leave it right here.

Yes, I can make him laugh.

Yes, he is tall enough to go quail hunting with a net.

Yes, Bubba told me to wipe the drool off my chin and that I was embarrassing myself.

Oh y’all, Michelle Obama is the cream on the peaches.  Her speech was such a wonder (sweet and tart) last night that I can hardly wait to hear Melania repeat it.

I’ll up our starting line up against their starting line up any day of the week and give them North Dakota’s electoral votes head start.

Okay, so here’s how we know that the last Hispanic Republican event wasn’t a crowd pleaser.

First off, the people holding the signs aren’t Hispanics.  We know this because Hispanics can read Spanish.  They know that this ain’t a thing – Hispanics Para Trump.

Hispanics is an English word.  The proper Spanish word is Hispanos.

Even better, para means “for” but not that kind of for.  Para is used when you’re giving a gift or showing the use of something — example: You use scissors for cutting paper.

The correct term would be “por”.  Hispanics por Trump.  The only word they got right was Trump.  But, ya know, one out of three ain’t bad.

Then a CNN commentator and one of Trump’s people went all I’m So Damn Smart on Tim Kaine.

“What Mr. Trump did, he spoke in a language all Americans can understand ― that is English,” Hughes told CNN anchor Wolf Blitzer while praising the Republican presidential nominee.

“I didn’t have to get a translator for anything that was going on at the [Republican National Convention] this week,” she continued.

“I’m hoping I’m not going to have to start brushing up on my ‘Dora the Explorer’ to understand some of the speeches given this week,” she added, referencing the children’s cartoon that stars a child who can speak English and Spanish.

She later apologized on Twitter.  Too little, too late.