Archive for October, 2015

It’s The End Of The World As We Know It And Buddy Ain’t Doing So Good

October 20, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Well, all good things must come to an end, including the rebel flag on the Greene County, Tennessee, courthouse.

The good news is that the vote was 19 – 1 in favor of removing that sucker.

The bad news is that the commissioner, Buddy Randolph, who voted to keep it is plenty sore about it and …. well, one other thing.

Screen Shot 2015-10-20 at 1.22.37 PM“The Confederate flag is American history. Part of it, whether you like it or not,” said Randolph, a local sheriff’s deputy. “And that’s the reason I did this — no other reason. They wanna do everything and we let them get by with doin’ away with it. … First thing they done is take prayer outta schools years ago.

“They wanna take Christmas signs down, and trees, and everything. The Ten Commandments. And we let’em get by with it. But it’s time we stand up and do something.”

He’s a damn deputy sheriff.  Hell, the man is barely literate. They also took away his book learning, but he doesn’t seem upset about that.

Thanks to Hannity is herb tarlek for the heads up.

Fun With Guns: Revolving Door Edition

October 20, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

A woman was checking her mother out of the hospital yesterday in East Texas.

The woman reached into her mother’s purse to retrieve some paperwork when she inadvertently pulled out the small-caliber handgun.

Authorities say the gun tumbled to the ground and discharged, sending a bullet through a wall and striking another patient who was also checking out.

They say that the victim’s wound is not life threatening.

In case you’re wondering where the good guy with a gun was during this incident, he was upstairs in surgery having is head pulled out of his butt.

 

This Just Ain’t Ted Cruz’s Day

October 20, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Well, you know how bad I’d feel if anything unfortunate happened to Ted Cruz.  I mean, here’s this Super DeLux Brand Christian Man O’ God who everybody just picks on.

Take the FEC for example.  They released the information that caused this headline in the Washington Post:

Screen Shot 2015-10-20 at 12.12.22 PM

Now, if you’re wondering what psychographic profiling is and why it costs $750,000, it does voter personality profiling.

Cambridge Analytica aims to increase the accuracy of micro-targeting by adding “psychographic analysis” to widely available demographic data. Potential voters who look much the same on paper — a 35-year-old white woman from Iowa, for example — may have very different personalities that make them care about different things and respond to different political messages, according to Nix.

So what Ted is going to do is gather all the information he can on you, put it in data form, and pay a mathematical witchdoctor to tell hm what to say to you.  Everything Republicans claim to hate.

The good news for us:  (Click the little one to get the big one.)

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It ain’t working worth diddle squat.  Cruz remains at 4% behind the other Bible Thumper, Mike Huckabee.  Huckabee has probably spent $1.98 total.

Then, his former employer George W Bush went all wacky weed on Ted.

Fox News reported

Former President George W. Bush reportedly ripped into Texas Sen. Ted Cruz at a weekend gathering of donors to his brother’s presidential campaign, according to a published report Monday.

Politico reported that Bush said of Cruz, “I just don’t like the guy,” at the event, which was held Sunday night in Denver.

Bush said that he didn’t like the way Cruz was all palsey-wowsey with Trump and added that he is refusing to paint a portrait of Cruz’s feet in the bathtub. Okay, so I made up that last part.  So sue me.

They say things come in threes and, hell, it’s only noon!

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.

Oh Y’all, Trey Gowdy is Coming Apart Right Before Our Eyes

October 19, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Because God strongly dislikes Trey Gowdy, he’s causing Gowdy to look like a damn fool in public. Repeatedly.

Well done, God.  Well Done.

House Benghazi Committee Chairman Trey Gowdy appears to have accidentally released the name of a CIA source in the midst of a back-and-forth with Democrats about how sensitive the information was and whether its presence in former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton’s private email account constituted a security breach.

Trying to be Mr. Smarty Pants, Gowdy replied to an email from Elijah Cummings demanding an apology to Clinton.  Howdy refused and then did exactly what he is accusing Clinton of doing.

So, Gowdy, how’s that security breach feel on you now?  A little tight, you say?

That’s the fun part about Republicans, eventually they will do whatever it is they claim you are doing wrong.

 

Yeah, Because … Freedom

October 19, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

That’s the nice thing about Republicans, you don’t have to wait for an election before you call for impeachment.

Arkansas Alabama Republican Congressman Mo Brooks:

Screen Shot 2015-10-19 at 1.54.14 PM“In my judgement, with respect to Hillary Clinton, she will be a unique president if she is elected by the public next November,” he added. “Because the day she’s sworn in is the day that she’s subject to impeachment because she has committed high crimes and misdemeanors.”

Can we wait until after the Inaugural Balls or do we need to just haul her off the second she finishes the oath?

I wonder if they are already printing up new Impeach Clinton bumper stickers or just recycling the old ones?

(By the way, thank to Anna for getting everything working on the website in record time.)

Baptist Fight in the Cafeteria!

October 19, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Well, Brethren, it appears that Saint Cruz and Saint Huckabee are spitting brimstone at each other.

They both attended the North Texas Presidential Forum at Prestonwood Baptist Church in Fort Worth along with all the other Republican Presidential Jesus Junta.

The pastor at Prestonwood, Jack Graham, endorsed Huckabee four years ago.

Back then, Graham called Huckabee’s message “God’s word from God’s man.”

But this year, Ted hit the stage flinging swords and floods.  Honey, you’d have thought Lott’s wife had never looked back.

The younger Cruz turned up the heat right away, declaring an “awakening — we are seeing a spirit of revival across this nation.”

When Cruz said, “Our consitutional rights are under assault,” voices shouted back, “Yeah!” and “Amen!”

Cheers rose again when he said, “2016 is going to be a religious liberty election,” and brought up the 1980 pivot-turn election of President Reagan: “I believe 2016 will be an election like 1980.”

I’ve seen enough tent revivals in my life to know that you better grab ahold of your wallet and and good sense because that man will steal both.

We’e having some technical problems this morning and my hyperlink gadget isn’t working this morning so you can find the whole story right here:   http://www.star-telegram.com/opinion/opn-columns-blogs/bud-kennedy/article39824838.html#storylink=cpy