by Primo Encarnación

Nancy Gordeuk, erstwhile founder and principal of TNT Academy, a Georgia for-profit school, has been let go.  You may remember her from Juanita’s post this Monday last, wherein she blamed the devil for all that racist spew dribbling down her chinless face.  After that sounded too much like an admission of guilt, she then attempted to claim she hadn’t said anything racist at all: “I didn’t know ‘black people’ was a racist term. I didn’t say the N-word or anything like that ’cause that isn’t in my vocabulary.”

Because shaming a whole segment of the population for behavior which occurs at every graduation I’ve ever been to is NOT racist, as long as none of the individual words themselves is a racist term?

Well, her board of directors disagreed, and bounced her pasty, flabby, white trash patootie out onto the street.  I’m guessing that the only thing that took them so long was deciding whether to throw her out the front door, or from a second-story window.

I’m further guessing that her next stop is FAUX News with Hannity, followed by a round of wingnut welfare via a GoFundMe extravaganza.   Anyone want to give me odds?

Allen West, Republican presidential candidate and renown self loathing expert became the victim, victim I tell you!, of WalMart’s oppressive Muslim agenda.

West touted that he had been viciously assaulted by Sharia Law at WalMart.

There was a young man doing the checkout and another Walmart employee came over and put up a sign, “No alcohol products in this lane.” So being the inquisitive fella I am, I used my additional set of eyes — glasses — to see the young checkout man’s name. Let me just say it was NOT “Steve.”

I pointed the sign out to Aubrey and her response was a simple question, how is it that this Muslim employee could refuse service to customers based on his religious beliefs, but Christians are being forced to participate in specific events contrary to their religious beliefs?

Good damn question and I guess we’ll discover the answer as soon at people under the age of 21 can sell alcohol.

If that man was any dumber we’d have to water him once a week.

I’d like to point out something.  In Texas, you cannot buy alcohol from midnight on Saturday until noon on Sunday.  I think that’s because all the Baptist ministers got tired of their church showing up drunk.  Non-Christians are being forced by law to participate in this Christian ritual of Sunday sobriety.  So West can kiss my big blue butt.

Second, my Momma does not drink.  At all.  She is opposed to drinking on religious grounds.  We did talk her into a Margarita on her 85th birthday under the theory that it would be good for her health to have a drink every 85 years.  She says she drank it but she didn’t swallow.  I love Momma. I do.  I told you that story because I am grateful that Allen West is not my momma.

Thanks to Larry for the heads up.

Well, kiddos, it appears that the FBI has been spying on “environmental extremists” in Houston, Texas.  And the definition of environmental extremist is people who oppose the Keystone pipeline.

I am not kidding.

Internal agency documents show for the first time how FBI agents have been closely monitoring anti-Keystone activists, in violation of guidelines designed to prevent the agency from becoming unduly involved in sensitive political issues.

The documents reveal that one FBI investigation, run from its Houston field office, amounted to “substantial non-compliance” of Department of Justice rules that govern how the agency should handle sensitive matters.

One FBI memo, which set out the rationale for investigating campaigners in the Houston area, touted the economic advantages of the pipeline while labelling its opponents “environmental extremists”.

After The Guardian ran the story, Charles Pierce of Esquire Magazine picked it up and wrote —

… it is fair to conclude that what the FBI and TransCanada really were cooking up was a counter-propaganda operation using the investigative auspices of the FBI. In other words, the FBI office in Houston joined in ratfking the opposition to the pipeline. Gordon Liddy must be weeping for joy.

Okay, so why is the FBI conspiring with a foreign government to screw American citizens who oppose the foreign pipeline?  Oh yeah, they justify it by asserting that the Keystone pipeline is “vital to the security and economy of the United States.”

The hell you say?  It’s not our pipeline.  We don’t even get the oil.  I would suspect it would provide the same level of security as having a giant leaky x-ray machine in your backyard to check for burglars coming over your fence.

So what do we do about the FBI violating it’s own rules?  Two game suspension?

You gotta wonder if they are also monitoring President Obama.

Thanks to Craig for the heads up.

Missouri House Speaker Republican John Diehl, one of those Republicans who believe in personality responsibility, got caught sexting with an intern at the capitol.

Yeah well, he just didn’t mention that one of those opportunities for our kid and grandkids was to text the nasty with a powerful Republican speaker.

It only took him two weeks after being confronted with the evidence to admit he did it.

Thanks to Larry for the heads up.

Public Policy Polling proved that The Crazy Party and the Republican Party have officially merged.

A new survey from Public Policy Polling finds that one-third of Republicans believe the Jade Helm 15 conspiracy theory that “the government is trying to take over Texas,” and another 28 percent of GOP voters haven’t made up their minds yet about the matter.

If my math is correct, and most times it is, that means that 61% of Republicans believe that it is or could be true that there are large underground tunnels connecting WalMarts all across the country, put there by the United States military and prepared to be used by President Barack Obama to take away your guns, your beer and your air conditioning this summer starting in Bastrop, Texas, with 60 troops, two Humvees, and a helicopter.

Sixty.  One.  Percent.  So if you’re a Republican and you’re not wacko or at least edging up on it, you’re not in the big tent.  If you’re a Republican and you’re at a family reunion and ten people are there, six of them should not be allowed to have knives or matches.

I heard one guy on the electric teevee insisting that Obama was going to brainwash them all.  Well, they damn well need it!  Hell, in the alternative, their brains don’t need washing because there’s nothing there to get dirty.  President Obama could just braindust them.

I have for the life of me been trying to figure out what Obama is going to do with all the people he’s herding into WalMarts.  A girl’s softball league with players of all genders?  A rock band: Guns and Tribulations?  A special army to invade Hawaii to destroy his birth certificate?

Beats the hell outta me.

I don’t know this for a fact, but I have been told that Russians are notoriously homophobic.

Apparently, Sweden heard the same thing.

They are currently being pestered by Russian submarines off their coast.  It is so troublesome, in fact, that Sweden is increasing its military defense spending because they suspect Russia is trying to start a cold war again.

Meanwhile, some peace-loving organizations in Sweden have created a stop-gap measure that seems to be working.

The Swedish Peace and Arbitration Society (SPAS) is to deal with encroaching Russian submarines in Swedish waters with a device emitting anti-homophobia Morse code.

The device – officially titled The Singing Sailor Underwater Defence System, but nicknamed the “gay sailor” – is a “subsurface sonar system”, which sends out the message: “This way if you are gay” in an attempt to deter apparently homophobic Russians.

“Welcome to Sweden: Gay since 1944” is written in English and Russian, in a reference to the year of decriminalisation of homosexuality in the Scandinavian nation.

And the best line of all….

Sweden is currently not a member of Nato. And thanks to the gay sailor defence system, it may never have to be.

Thanks to Deb and Craig for the heads up.