And you guys thought Texas and Arizona had cornered the market on crazy politicians.

No so.  Welcome to Rocky Mountain Highs.

Colorado House District 15’s Republican nominee, Gordon “Dr. Chaps” Klingenschmitt takes the homophobic cake. Speaking about Rep. Jared Polis, a Democrat.

The open persecution of Christians is underway. Democrats like Polis want to bankrupt Christians who refuse to worship and endorse his sodomy. Next he’ll join ISIS in beheading Christians, but not just in Syria, right here in America.

Golly gee, ya think maybe he’s carried that just a bit too far?  Just a little?

Thanks to Larry for the heads up.

After the members of Westboro Baptist Church threatened to picket Robin Williams funeral, Australian comedian Adam Hills offered to buy them all tickets to Iraq.

Hills pointed out that the infamous “God Hates Fags” group is quick to march around with signs protesting American hedonism, but don’t have the courage to protest the daily persecution Christians in Iraq are facing at the hands of “the people threatening to behead Christians if they don’t convert.”

And the folks at Westboro, who have all had something strange done to their brains, accept.

Seriously, they accept.

Then they claim to have picketed in Iraq before.  “Google it.”  I did.  Apparently Iraqi News missed that one.

I hope the tickets are one way.

Thanks to Mike for the heads up.

Last night I got a text message from Glen Maxey, who was in an airport in Atlanta.  He told me that he was fixing to get on the same flight as Louie Gohmert.

I warned him that until they can scientifically prove that goofy is not contagious, he should take another flight.  I also told him that I’d pay one dollar cash American money for a picture of Louie Gohmert.   Since the quality of the picture  is bad and Louie is not picking his nose, he’s only getting fifty cents.

By the way, we did raise enough money to send Louie some love in the form of people to vote against him by mail.  Glen says we’ve raised about $4,200 which covers about 12,500 people.  We only need $500 more to reach our goal.

Meanwhile, Louie is touring Texas State Technical College in Marshall, Texas, to see the truck driving school.  Still it’s college and Louie will need some of the big words explained to him.

We here at The World’s Most Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc., just want you to know that we’re keeping an eye on Louie.  Now if we could just keep a foot on him, we’d be happy.

So there was this judge in Arizona named Mark Chiles.  Chiles went a little nuts and even though a justice of the peace in Arizona make $101,500 a year, he shoplifted a speaker for his iPod from WalMart.

You know, that’s something I never understood.  If you’re going to shoplift, don’t shoplift from WalMart.  Shoplift from Saks Fifth Avenue, for goodness sake.

Anyway, Chiles blamed health problems at the time of his arrest in May of 2013.  He said he was having trouble sleeping and had lots of aches and pain.  You know, like all of us do.

So Chiles resigns and moseys on down the road.

Until last week, when he surfaces at the Canadian border.

Markel Kay Chiles, 56, was arrested at the Huntingdon border crossing in British Columbia in May, allegedly carrying a pair of .22​-calibre, multi-barrelled handguns: a Texas Defender and a Cobra C22M.

He was charged with gun smuggling.

So I imagine that Canada will call up the Manitoba National Guard, build a wall, and send Sean Hannity to protect them.

By the way, do I even have to tell you what political party this guy is?

Thanks to Elizabeth for the heads up.

It is probably pretty boring in Ohio and I say that because they have to make their own fun.

Patrick Johnson is the head anti-choice guy in Ohio and he, of course, is just all a’tither about boobs.  His church has been protesting at a topless bar for years.  One Sunday, just for the helluva it, the topless dancers returned the favor and protested his church, topless.

Was he upset?  Is a frog waterproof?

He wants to stop all this public nudity.  In Ohio.  To me, and I only speak for myself here and not the entire staff of the World’s Most Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc. because some of them disagree with me, the problem in Ohio is that there is not near enough public nudity.  Verdelia disagrees.  “It would take more than a few nakkid hooters to get me to vacation in Ohio,” she says.

Patrick Johnson wants to outlaw nakedness in Ohio.  You have no idea the problems naked is causing in Ohio.  But, Patrick is more than willing to tell you …

“The gay pride parade in Columbus is 500,000 strong – why? Because the women go topless,” he insisted on Facebook. “This is the only one where I’ve seen this level of nudity. San Francisco, Chicago, Washington, D.C. I have never seen the kind of public lewdness I have seen in Columbus, Ohio.”

Okay, just a thought here.  He does understand, doesn’t he, what gay means, right?

Just a second thought here.  How many Pride parades did he have to attend to come up with this scientific measurement of cross country lewdness?  Buck Pochek over at The Good Folks at Buck Pochek’s Rural Entertainment Promoters and General Purpose Feed Store, says he’d like to apply for that job when nakkid season opens again.  He wants to publish “Naked: The Coloring Book.”  That’s a best seller, for sure.

But, Patrick ain’t finished yet.  Outrage is an aphrodisiac in rightwing nut land and sometimes it takes an extra dose or two to get the juices flowing, so Patrick keeps on raging on.

“I am sick that women can legally bare their breasts to children and to married men against their will in Ohio,” he says.

Patrick, they are just ta-ta.  See, I’m sick that preacher men can bare their nakkid hypocrisy and really, really bad hairdos in stinkin’ public.

Thanks to Brian for the heads up.

Congresswoman Cathy McMorris Rodgers is from Washington state.  I have it on good authority that she’s pretty stuck on herself.

Well, now she’s stuck on more than herself.

It appears that Cathy sent out mailer about social security and how Obamacare hurts social security and that she’s going to “restore Medicare.”  Bullcorn.

Well, come to find out, the woman pictured on the mailer passed away well over a year ago.  Her friends are not happy about this.  It seems that the congresswoman did not get permission to use the picture.

“So here’s a flyer protecting us from senior cutbacks,” Tim Brattebo said. “It gives the appearance that [the Congresswoman] is talking to Maxine about this. Well I know she wasn’t.”

Her office says, “There was a breakdown in our standard approval process at the staff level…” yada yada yada.  Obama.  Freedom.  Liberty.

Thanks to Brian for the heads up.