Y’all what the hell is he wearing?  Is that a life jacket or papal vestments?

I think he’s signaling drones with his dome.

No, seriously what the hell is he wearing?

Please note that they won’t take the boat away from the dock with Louie aboard.

How do you say the i word without saying the i word?  Oh, issuing a warning to President Obama is a good place to start.

Republican congressfool Steve King from the vast plains of Iowa up and decided to say the i word without actually doing so.

Rep. Steve King (R-IA) pleaded with President Barack Obama over the weekend not to force the House of Representatives to begin impeachment hearings by taking executive action on reforming the immigration process after Congress failed to do so.

Kings says that if President Obama stops the deportation of 11 million then congress has no choice. “I think Congress has to sit down and have a serious look at the rest of this Constitution, and that includes that i-word that we don’t want to say.”

So, if they start impeachment proceedings, it’s Obama’s fault.  He made them do it.  They couldn’t do anything else.  They had to impeach him.  They didn’t want to but Obama gave them no choice.  Well, I guess they could hold their breath instead, but nahhh …. that doesn’t get headlines.  I guess they could go to lunch instead of impeaching but they can’t agree on where to go.

See?  They HAVE to impeach him.

Altogether now, 3…2…1… it’s Obama’s fault.

And, while we’re talking about Steve King, I need to tell you that he did something else to hack me off.

So, he gets on the electric teevee and preaches against Dreamers.  And the son of a motherless goat says, “Well, not all Dreamers are valedictorians.”

Well, I would listen to this old goat except for the fact that he attended Northwest Missouri State University (whose motto is “we’ve never heard of you either”) majoring in being a “wildlife officer.”  He dropped out before getting a degree .  So, let’s not be talking about valedictorians, Mr. Dropout.

Maybe all Dreamers aren’t valedictorians but they are all of “good moral character,” which is more than Steve King can say.  King voted against legislation opposing dogfight and cock fighting.

He makes my butt hurt.

Rick Perry is wildly crazy about Israel.  He’s not crazy about Israelis, just the country Israel.  He’s a Baptist and Baptist don’t believe that Jews are going to heaven unless they accept Jesus as their personal savior.  Or, as in Rick’s case, as their own personal weapon.

Today, Rick announced that killing unarmed children was really okay because “Hamas was using them as human shields.”

“But when we have a fairly good understanding that Hamas is actually using their citizens as shields, at that particular point in time, it loses a lot of the the power, if you will, from my perspective,” the Texas Republican continued.

Since when is dehumanizing children —God’s creation—an acceptable Christian view?

Let me see if I have this straight:  It’s not okay to have an abortion after a rape or incest, but it is okay to kill children if they are being victimized by adults.

Oddly, Palestine Christians are direct descendants of the first Christians.

Rick Perry, listen up:  Blessed are the damn peacemakers.  They shall be called the children of God.  Are you sleeping in church, you damfool?

Thanks to Monty for the heads up.

Living in Texas and knowing some Dream Kids, this scares me and makes me want to cry.

There are stringent requirements to be a Dreamer.  First, they must be “of good moral character,” which would eliminate most members of congress.

Hewitt is a fair-sized town outside of Waco, where, as you know, nothing is fair.

Hewitt has a police department.  It also has had a firearms instructor for that police department.

The firearms instructor for the Hewitt Police Department is recovering from surgery after accidentally shooting himself in the left hand while teaching family members to shoot.

According to reports, Sgt Heath Vanek was teaching his family to shoot a pistol.  Prior to shooting himself, he was “teaching them how to clear a semi-automatic pistol’s chamber in case the gun jams.”  Likely story.

[Chief Jim] Devlin said Vanek, 35, declined comment Friday about his accidental injury.

Yeah, I suppose “I was aiming for my mother in law’s head,” wouldn’t be a proper thing to say.

Thanks to Pam for the heads up.

In case y’all wonder what I do when I’m not here it’s stuff like this.  http://www.outsmartmagazine.com/2014/08/republicans-hold-2016-convention-cleveland-ohio/