Lord, forgive them because they know not what they do.  No seriously, Lord, they ain’t got a clue what they’re doing most of the damn time.

Because King James does not have a proper grasp of the English language …

Two cast members of the A&E reality show “Duck Dynasty” have announced the release date of their most recent book, a Duck Commander-themed Bible slated to be released online and in retail stores on Oct. 28.

We can only assume that other various Duck Commander money-making cheap crap entrepreneurial efforts from China will be sold along side the Holy Quackin’ Bible.

So The Holy Bible is going to be translated into phony reality show with a dose of hate and marrying 16 year olds on top.

I wonder if I can special order mine with a catfish bookmarker and a bullet hole through the parts I don’t like?

Thanks to Brian for the heads up.

Because … Freedom.

Outside of Kansas City, Missouri.

Highway traffic was diverted early Monday after a dummy wearing an Obama mask was spotted hanging from a noose attached to a Missouri overpass.

The bomb squad was called in, and crews used a robot to remove the dummy and take it to a nearby field where it was tested for explosives. Officers used an X-ray machine to look for a possible IED, but found nothing.

These people are going to be so sad when Hillary is elected President.  I guess they’ll have to tie a dummy to a broom using an apron.

Thanks to Larry for the heads up.

You remember how Tea Party candidate Chris McDaniel vs. Thad Cochran has been the craziest race in America so far?  I mean, it’s not every race that involves four arrests for sneaking into a nursing home to photograph a candidate’s wife.

And the candidate made a run-off against the incumbent?

When the goings get weird the political pros get weirder.

The Hinds County Sheriff’s Department is investigating why three people, including a high-ranking Chris McDaniel campaign official, were found locked in the Hinds County Courthouse in Jackson hours after an election official says the building was closed early Wednesday morning.

No, really.  Three people, each having a different story about how it happened.  And, boy howdy, they are Tres Amigos with some evil intent on their agenda.

There’s Janis Lane, Scott Brewster and Rob Chambers.

Lane is a member of the board of directors of the Central Mississippi Tea Party.

Chambers is a consultant with the Mississippi Baptist Christian Action Commission who has worked with McDaniel and members of the Senate Conservative Coalition to fight Common Core.

Brewster is a former coordinator of presidential candidate Newt Gingrich’s Mississippi operation and is currently McDaniel’s campaign coalition coordinator.

That makes the worse walk-into-a-bar joke ever.  A Tea Party organizer, a Baptist, and a political operative walk into a bar…. They drink all the liquor, steal the cash register and shoot out the security camera.

Get this:  They were locked inside the courthouse until 3:45 am when everybody else left at 11:30.  Mark my word — there was either hanky panky or devil worship going on.

With the rate that Chris McDaniel’s political operatives are getting arrested, they ought to name one of the prisons after him.

Here’s the latest —

Hinds County Republican Executive Chairman Pete Perry said he had serious concerns about the incident.

“I don’t care who it is. I have a concern with someone being in the courthouse with all the election material down there,” Perry said.

Perry said everyone left the courthouse by 11:30 p.m. Tuesday and locked up.

He said he got a phone call from Lane around 2 a.m. Wednesday saying two people, including her, were locked inside the courthouse and were looking for a way out.

Perry said Lane was a precinct worker and had dropped off her ballot materials about 8:30 p.m. Perry said some precinct information wasn’t sealed.

Honey, leave me, Thelma, and Verdelia alone with the ballots for a few hours and I could be President of the United States.  Or, hell, Queen of the World – my rightful title.

Ya know, this might be worth a road trip to Biloxi just to watch in person.

Thanks to Mike for the heads up.

Annette Bosworth ran for the Republican Party nomination for US Senate in South Dakota.

Dr. Annette Bosworth lost the US Republican Senate Primary seat in Tuesday’s election.

Bosworth said she made a commitment to God to serve South Dakota for forty years, so that’s what she plans to do.

Humm … I wonder why 40 years.  Maybe it has something to do with floods and she got days and years mixed up.

Well, as if losing wasn’t enough, she found out today that forging 40% of the signatures on your petition to file for office might make those 40 years seem like 40 to life.

Former South Dakota Senate Candidate Dr. Annette Bosworth was informed at 9:28am this morning by Sgt. Jason Gearman of the Minnehaha Sheriff’s office that a warrant had been issued for her arrest by Attorney General Marty Jackley.

Bosworth was told by her attorney that the charge relate to election activity, specifically petition signatures.

So, I guess that whole “commitment to God to serve South Dakota for 40 years” make a whole lot more sense if you take out the South Dakota.

Of course she was endorsed by …

And not to be outdone —

Yeah, ole Sarah and Ted can really pick ‘um.

Thanks to Mike for the heads up.

Okay, so I know you’ve been wondering what kind of people elect Louie Gohmert.

This kind.

LUFKIN, Texas (AP) — A domestic disturbance call at an East Texas home includes a police report that a woman used a dead catfish to smack her sister-in-law in the face.

Officers were summoned after a woman allegedly used a fish to slap her sister-in-law in the face, the brother and sister argued and he asked his sibling to leave. Shurley says the sister called police to report being assaulted.

And she did not even know the catfish was loaded?  She was cleaning her catfish and it went off accidentally?

I know one of my rules of life is don’t hack-off a woman holding a catfish.

Open Carry Catfish