Okay, we all know that President Obama is a Muslim.  Maybe secretly, maybe in the open.

But, here’s a new theory.

Congressidiot Trent Frank of Arizona wonders why Islamic extremists haven’t murdered Obama since that’s what they have vowed to do if someone turns from Islam to Christianity.  Well, there you go.  See, he’s not dead and that’s pretty good proof that he’s a Muslim.

But, the best is yet to come.

He went on to argue that Obama’s Christian faith is further proof that he’s a Muslim, explaining that he can still be a Muslim while he identifies as a Christian. Spencer added: “Whatever his personal beliefs are, certainly if he were a secret Muslim, he wouldn’t be acting any differently from how he is anyway.”

Well hell, that means all Christians are secret Muslims and you know that because they are … Christians?

My head hurts.

Tell me, how does one “act like a Muslim?”  Live like a Christian?

Thanks to TexasTrailerParkTrash for the heads up.

Okay, I don’t wanna be picky but I got Rick Perry’s email Christmas card today and I think it’s a tad creepy.

I’m not saying he picked a rather odd Bible verse to celebrate the Prince of Peace’s birth.  Click the little one to get the big one.

I mean really?  You picked Jesus’s birthday to talk about battle and subduing people under you?  Really?

This ain’t a Christmas Card, Honey.  It’s a warning shot at Chris Christie.

Rick Perry — he ain’t just fartin’ around this time.  He’s declaring a holy war.

Now the FEC is all up in Steve Stockman’s face.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, something about illegal contributions.  Like the law ever applied to Steve Bygawd Stockman in the first place.

I mean, hell, what’s the point of being in congress if you can’t take all the money people wanna give you?

It was a Christmas present, FEC, so there.  You don’t love little Baby Jesus?  You don’t believe in Christmas presents?

Thanks to Alfredo over at the Dairy Queen for the heads up.

Okay, here’s the deal.  A&E hires some religious right gun totin’ self-professed rednecks from the back bayous of Louisiana  and then acts shocked, shocked I tell you, when they say something religious right gun totin’ self-professed redneck.

Have you ever seen a person of color on that show?  No, you have not.  And how do women have a say in family matters?  By hoochy only.  And why does that one brother never appear on the show?  Uh, maybe he’s in the closet?

While the Dixie Chicks are not entitled to the First Amendment, rednecks are.  You gotta keep the rules right.

This is not a first amendment matter.  This is a free enterprise matter.

If this family thinks gays are going to hell and blacks were perfectly happy to be slaves, then they are going to be mighty lonely in the great hereafter.  Nobody is gonna wanna be around when Sweet Jesus gives them a talkin’-to.

By the way, today is Momma’s 88th birthday and we’re having a big ole party. Here she is last month meeting her new great-grandson Ben for the first time.  She’s pretty in pink, isn’t she?

She’s a fourth generation Texan and comes from a long line of strong women, all of who lived unhindered into their nineties.  Last month someone asked her if she had lived in Houston all her life.  “Not yet,” she replied.

Happy Birthday, Momma.

You need to meet Larry Kilgore.  Larry officially and legally changed his middle name to SECEDE so he could run for governor on the Republican ticket as Larry SECEDE Kilgore.

A plan so crazy it just might work.

I know you’re gonna think I’m making this stuff up but I am not.

Larry believes in the Bible.  His Bible says that homosexuals should be put to death.  But, there’s where the problems comes in –  he needs homosexual votes to win, so he’s willing to forgive them momentarily to get elected.  He explains it better than I can.

“I am a Christian, and I have lots of Christian beliefs. However, I am trying to build a coalition of all different types of people. I look at the lesbians and the homosexual folks and I say, ‘Hey, D.C. is stealing my money just like they’re stealing your money.’ After we get our freedom, then we can decide all that stuff — hopefully at a county level. Right now, lesbians and homosexuals and Christians may have differences with each other, but we’ve got a bigger enemy.”

Well hell yeah.  Better to let Larry kill you than to let Washington steal your money.  And I know homosexuals will feel so much better knowing they are being killed by county government rather than state government.  I mean, that right there is something worth fighting for.

But before you straight people get too cocky, Larry has some plans for you, too.

Asked what the punishment for homosexuality should be, Kilgore said, “According to the Bible, it should be execution, if anyone participates in that activity.” But he said the same for adulterers and women who have abortions.

I think he’s going for the group rate on executions.

I suspect your stomach is still turning at the thought of Steve Stockman’s campaign headquarters.  If so, ho boy, do I have a treat for you!

Maybe all Republican congressmen are pigs.  Maybe.  California congressman Dana Rohrabacher certainly qualifies.  He, apparently, was raised in a barn.

When Congressman Dana Tyrone Rohrabacher moved into a four-bedroom, four-bathroom, million-dollar Costa Mesa rental home on April Fool’s Day 2010, the immaculate, 6,300-square-foot property could have been featured in a glossy real-estate magazine.

But it’s now understandable why Orange County’s senior, career politician secretly changed the locks and refused to allow homeowner Robert Polyniak inside for annual inspections. When he moved out in August 2012, Rohrabacher left behind a shockingly horrific pigsty, a dump worse than a college fraternity house of unhygienic slobs unfamiliar with the most basic tools of cleaning.

Okay, okay, hold your nose.  Here’s a kitchen shot.

Oh, and there’s more.

And here’s the catch.  Rohrabacher is suing the landlord to get his $6,700 security deposit.

And that, my friends, is how Republicans live and think.

Thanks to Alfredo over at the Dairy Queen, who keeps a spotless Blizzard machine, for the heads up.