Archive for September, 2013

This is Getting Good!

September 22, 2013 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Pass the popcorn, Thelma!

Republican Rep. Peter King said Friday that his Republican colleague in the Senate, Ted Cruz, “is a fraud” who will “no longer have any influence in the Republican Party” after the House votes on a measure that could potentially lead to a government shutdown.

So Republican Representative Peter King just called Republican Senator Ted Cruz a fraud. He left out, “You’re ugly and your Momma dresses you funny.” He’s saving that for Monday, I suspect.

Okay, so here’s the deal. Thelma and I are going to open the One Stop Republican Insult Emporium, where for just a dollar a piece, we will provide Republicans with words to insult other Republicans.

Like, “He just snapped a link in his tracer chain.”

We’ll even personalize some of them, like for Cruz, “Is your butt jealous about the amount of crap that just came out of your mouth?” (That’s a $2 one.)

“Remember when you stopped to think for a minute? Well, you need to start again.”

“I don’t exactly detest you but if you were on fire and I had a glass of water, I’d drink it.”

“Hey, McConnell, you’re so old that you fart dust.”

“We all sprang from apes, but Rand Paul didn’t spring far enough.”

Oh hell, I’ll give them these for free. I think they need pies to throw, too. That would be so cool!

Thanks to Susan for the heads up.

The Goat Rodeo

September 22, 2013 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

I want you to meet another cabrito in the Texas Republican goat rodeo.

His name is Blake Farenthold and he represents the Corpus Christi area.  We also call him Ducky Jammie Boy for a semi-gross event where he showed up in ducky pajama and posed with young women (one underage) who were not dressed for prayer meeting.

 

Now here’s the catcher.  A year ago, Farenthold screamed at Eric Cantor over the debt ceiling,“You guys are killing me. You guys have got to give us some bones to throw to the tea party.”

He’s got to throw bones, y’all, because running is not an option.

 

As You Can See ….

September 21, 2013 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

We’re having some unexpected problems with the transfer.  I post, the ghosts erase.

If you by chance have saved any of the posts I made yesterday, send them to me from the TELL JUANITA page.  Hopefully, that is still working.

Thank you to Jason for being my hero!  We were able to restore most of it.

 

Friday Toons and The New Deal

September 19, 2013 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Okay, here’s the New Deal best I know.  This website will locked down tonight (Thursday) at 9:00 p.m.  The site will still be here but neither you nor I can post anything,  make snide comments, or back sass.

It is highly likely that this condition will remain until noon (maybe even later) tomorrow so I am going ahead and posting Friday Toons on Thursday night.

If things don’t go well, I will post about it on Facebook and let you know when we’ll be back!

cwkal130920

 

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BREAKING NEWS As a Surprise to No One … UPDATED

September 19, 2013 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Breaking News:

HOUSTON -– A Texas Court of Appeals in Austin has overturned the conviction of former U.S. House Majority Leader Tom DeLay, attorney Brian Wice told KVUE sister station KHOU 11 News.

In documents released early Thursday, the court said the evidence in the case was “legally insufficient to sustain DeLay’s convictions.”

The court said all judgments against DeLay were reversed, and the former congressman was formally acquitted.

It was a 2 – 1 vote.  The two Republicans voted with Tom.  The one Democrat did not.

The State can request a review by the Court of Appeals.

Now I have to watch more of this crap.

And here’s the dissenting opinion.

Travis County District Attorney Rosemary Lehmberg just issued this statement.

“Today, two judges sitting on the Third Court of Appeals reversed and acquitted former United States House Majority Leader Tom DeLay, who was convicted of felony offenses by a jury in November of 2010.

“We are concerned and disappointed that two judges substituted their assessment of the facts for that of 12 jurors who personally heard the testimony of over 40 witnesses over the course of several weeks and found that the evidence was sufficient and proved DeLay’s guilt beyond a reasonable doubt.”

“We strongly disagree with the opinion of Judges Goodwin and Gaultney that the evidence was insufficient. We are concerned and disappointed that two judges substituted their assessment of the facts for that of 12 jurors who personally heard the testimony of over 40 witnesses over the course of several weeks and found that the evidence was sufficient and proved DeLay’s guilt beyond a reasonable doubt.

“We are preparing a response to this opinion and will ask the full Texas Court of Criminal Appeals to review the ruling.

I would like to add that I was sitting in the courtroom during the punishment phase of the trial and after hearing DeLay’s unsworn testimony, the judge said he, too, believed that DeLay was guilty.

The Cruz Missile Hits the GOP

September 19, 2013 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Republicans created Dr. Cruzenstein and now they seem shocked that he’s he’s walking around (1) looking like an idiot, and (2) taking all their money.

Let’s talk about coming back to bite you on the butt.  Ted Cruz is raking in more money lambasting Republicans than any Democrat does.  The part the GOP is mad about is that it’s Republican money.  Ted Cruz is taking Republican money to call other Republicans names.

Well, not every individual Republican is pretending to buy into Cruz’s plot. Some rational Republicans — or the “surrender caucus,” as Cruz calls them — see that the plan is doomed and are saying so. Here are five Republicans who are calling BS on Ted Cruz’s very profitable “Defund Obamacare” gambit.

Holding the American economy, paychecks for the military, and social security checks hostage is not going to work.  Ted Cruz knows that.

Hell, Ted Cruz is to politics what professional wrestling is to sports.

It’s all fake.  It’s just a money making deal.

You know, in all honesty, I would be rooting for this bull in a china closet except it’s my damn china closet.  This china closet doesn’t just belong to the GOP.  But the Republicans in congress all have breath that smells like hen feathers.

If the GOP is willing to sell the full faith and credit of the United States of Damn America to a man who is hall Hulk Hogan and half Jimmy Swaggart, then I say screw them all — and the horses they road in on because those horses were probably a lot smarter than the riders.

And that’s how I start my Thursday morning.