Archive for February, 2013

And, Meanwhile, in More Texas

February 28, 2013 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

This actual ad appeared in the actual Marble Falls, Texas, newspaper.

And the guest speaker is a consultant to the State Board of Education.  This must be a scary thought to Mississippi because they are the only state with a worse educational system than we have.   So, that means they have to have a crazier woman there.  But she is not taking out newspaper ads so they can’t find her.

If somebody goes tonight, please let us know.  I’d love to hear about the lesson, “Hey, Kids, Let’s Make Communist Flags.”  I’m so stupid that I didn’t know there was a Communist flag.

Thanks to Marge for the heads up.

Meanwhile, in East Texas …

February 28, 2013 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

See, they told you it was a good idea to arm school teachers

The Tyler Morning Telegraph has learned that a Van Independent School District employee accidentally was shot during a district-sponsored concealed handgun license class on Wednesday.

The class was part of an effort to permit teachers to carry firearms on VISD campuses.

Leslie Goode, a Van ISD school board member, confirmed that “there was an accident involving one of the employees today.”

Goode would not disclose the identity of the employee or the nature of the injury, but did say the accident would not change his mind about a recent decision by the board to arm some teachers.

Well hell yes, we’re just gonna start shooting each other but dammit we are not gonna stop because somebody might come from outside and shoot us.  We’d rather shoot each other.  It more fun that way.

The employee was a maintenance worker.  He is in the hospital in fair condition.

The same teacher who accidentally shot him will be in the classroom, armed, with Texas children.  I bet that makes Rick Perry plenty happy.

Thanks to a mess of people for the heads up.

Whadda I Tell Ya?

February 28, 2013 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

A while back when Momma wasn’t looking I quoted Phil Elliot of North Dallas Forty saying, “Freud says that guns are an extension of your dick, Jo Bob.”

Exactly.

Illinois state Rep. Jim Sacia (R) went on an epic tirade against Democratic legislators for forcing gun control on the entire state to deal with Chicago’s “run away gun problem” and said the state’s gun control laws are akin to asking him to get “castrated” because Chicagoans are having too many babies.

I guess he saw the movie, too.  But, obviously, the humor was lost on him.

I am of the belief that a man’s winkie should not need help to be semi-automatic with a fifty round clip.  It should be fully automatic all on its own.  And if he’s got more than four rounds, he needs to follow the advice of the Viagra commercial and seek medical attention.  That right there is all you need to know.

Thanks everybody for the heads up.

Bam! That’s It.

February 28, 2013 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Quote of the Month

We are ruled by people who think $250,000 annual income means you’re poor, but the minimum wage is too high and the olds have it too good.

Atrios  (Duncan Bowen Black) is the level best at memorable quotes.

Thanks to Deb for the heads up.

No Mo’ DOMA

February 27, 2013 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

The Defense of Marriage Act is more properly entitled The Defense of Bigotry Act.

I was delighted to hear that over 300 corporations filed briefs with the Supreme Court supporting the overturning of DOMA.

Signers include Amazon.com, Apple, Bank of New York, CBS, Cisco Systems, Citigroup, Deutsche Bank, Facebook, Google, JetBlue, Johnson & Johnson, Levi Strauss & Co, Liberty Mutual, Marriott International, Microsoft, Morgan Stanley, NIKE, Pfizer, Starbucks, Twitter, Viacom, Walt Disney Company and Xerox and the cities of Baltimore, Boston, Los Angeles, New York, San Francisco, Santa Monica and Seattle, among others.

The full list is in the brief at the ACLU site.    It starts on page 15.

The rightwing will have to stay at home if they boycott all of them.  Which, by the way, is an idea that gets the Juanita Seal of Approval.

The Fun Guys Over At Club for Growth

February 27, 2013 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

The Super Deluxe, New and Improved conservatives over at Club for Growth – and it appears that the only thing they’re interest in growing is their wallets – have decided that fighting Democrats isn’t working so good, so they’ve decided to fight Republicans.

Excellent choice.

Republicans and Republicans is so much more fun to watch than Cowboys and Indians.

The have gone and put up a website where they announce who they are going to “primary.”  I do not know when primary turned into a verb but I don’t like that day.

The website is called PrimaryMyCongressman dotcom and they allow you to nominate Republican congressmvarmits to get – oh crap, I gotta say it – primaried.

Now if you scamper on over there, they use opposition research type pictures of these Republicans and allow public comments at the bottom.  Only problem is that the same four comments show up on every page.

I do not know if Richard Zipper is a serious or not, but it doesn’t matter.  There it is.  For the world to see.

Now I’m not saying you should get any ideas about going over and helping with comments about these “liberal” Republicans.  I’m not saying that at all.  You got it?  I am not saying that.

But if you accidentally do that, make it funny.

Thanks to Kyle for the heads up.