Okay, so first you got how the Republicans feel about homosexuals. They don’t like ‘um none at all.

And next you got how the Republican feel about undocumented workers.  They don’t ‘um them absolutely none at all.

And then you’ve got former Arizona Republican county sheriff and and current congressional candidate Paul Babeu.  I never liked ‘um and always will.

Arizona GOP congressional candidate Paul Babeu acknowledged Saturday he is gay but forcefully denied charges he threatened an ex-lover with deportation after their relationship soured.

“All of the allegations are false except one, I am gay,” Babeu said.

The nationally renown Pinal County Sheriff called a news conference to address the explosive story by The Phoenix New Times that he pressured a man only identified as “Jose” into signing an agreement to conceal their relationship or face deportation.

Jose?  They call him Jose?  What?  Pedro was taken by another gay Republican’s undocumented worker?

Babeu also proclaimed, “”What I do in my personal life and private life is my business.”  Hey Bud, I’ll pay ten dollars cash American money to watch you say that to Bill Clinton’s face.

But my favorite quote came from his answer to the question of whether or not he’s going to drop out of the congressional race.

“We’re not cutting and running.  That’s not who I am,” he said.

I agree with that, Sheriff Babeu.  You’re not the cut and run type.  You’re more the hump and dump type.

I wonder if the Arizona Democratic party is making a call to the Arizona Republican party this morning to see if they can dust off some of their old Barney Franks joke and recycle them.

Thanks to half the population of the Juanitaville for giving me the heads-up on this yesterday when I was busier than granny with twenty snakes and one hoe.  Sometimes breaking news has to lay on the floor for a day or two until I can get around to sweeping it up.

Customer OldMayfly told me about a bumper sticker she heard about.  It says “GOP Primary — L O L” and the O in L O L was the Obama design.

I neeeeeed one of those.

Especially after seeing this and even this.  And don’t forget Ron Paul.

Plus, I’ve heard from two customers who have gotten polling calls asking about Herman Cain.  Questions like, “Do you see Herman Cain as a politician or a businessman?” and “Did media reports of Herman Cain being involved with a woman cause you to change your mind about him?”  So, it appears that somebody, somewhere will polling money just laying around wants Cain to re-enter the race.

I neeeeeed one of those bumper stickers.

Seriously.

Y’all, Newt Gingrich’s bus broke down in West Hollywood, also known as Boystown.

Newt Gingrich’s bus, missing a tire and flashing its hazards, was stranded half in a lane of traffic near Sunset and Crescent Heights for hours. It was unknown if he was on the bus at the time of the incident. Calls to Newt’s headquarters were not immediately returned.

Gingrich, who is in Los Angeles campaigning, did not receive much sympathy for his vehicle’s mechanical difficulties. Instead, locals took to Twitter with red-white-and-blue language, unsolicited advice, claims of voodoo, musings on karma, and at least one mention of a glitter-bomb:

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Read all about it here.

It’s an answered prayer.  It is.  Or, as customer said about it, “There is a God … and she has a wicked sense of humor.”

Thanks to Brian for the heads-up.

Y’all, if it’s not the seventh sign of the apocalypse, it’s at least the fifth or sixth.

Sarah Palin is back in the news.  Just when you thought it was safe to turn on the teevee or read the newspaper, Sarah Palin, the Narcissism Poster Child, prances back.

The key words:  brokered convention.

“We could be looking at a brokered convention,” she told Fox Business Network on Wednesday night. “Months from now, if that’s the case, all bets are off as to who it will be, willing to offer up themselves up in their name in service to their country. I would do whatever I could to help.”

And by “help” and “offering up,” I don’t think she meant leading group discussions on the economic policies of the Bush years.  Sarah’s the only candidate I’ve ever seen who could victimize herself into office.

Sarah wants to be President without all the bother of that pesky thing called campaigning.  Can’t say I blame her.  There’s a very cool airplane involved.

I want y’all to pray for this because I really, really, honest to goodness, need Sarah Plain after losing both Newt and Rick.