The ladies at The World’s Most Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc. are madder than wet hens.  “I want to be an actress, like the Kardashians,” Thelma wails.

It seems that Sarah Palin’s hairdresser is getting her own reality teevee show.

“I suspect they’re gonna call it White Trash Hair,” Juanita smiles and  remarks.  “Honey, we don’t do a Bumpit and split ends, so we’re obviously not qualified to have our own teevee show.”

Thanks to Patrick for the heads-up about this triumph of hickiness.

I am certain that you guys are well versed in the ways of Republicans in East Texas, the home of Louie Gohmert, Leo Berman, and a bucket of hate about the size of Mongolia.

So nobody was shocked when this sign appeared near Lufkin.

What did kinda bother people is that the sign was anonymous, as is most Republican hate. That goes back to the old hoods over their heads thing and the burning crosses. They are ashamed of what they think. As well they should be.

But, this time is a little different. Some folks are complaining.

And they are even threatening to go to the Texas Ethics Commission. Whoop-te-do. The Texas Ethics Commission needs Viagra just to get to work in the morning and a second dose to pour a cup of office. By then, they are too spent to do anything for the rest of the day. They give outrageous fines to Democrats and awards to Republicans for the same infractions.

But, some floozy chick with a beauty shop and a writ twit on payroll might have a better idea. It’s a clear violation of federal election law.

Pedro Khan, in-house counsel for the Dairy Queen and Dirt Janochek’s Rural Entertainment Promoters, told me this over lunch today.

The billboards violate two different provisions of the Federal Election Campaign Act.

First, the billboards constitute an independent expenditure because they expressly advocate the election or defeat of a clearly identified candidate for federal office. The Act requires any person (i.e., any individual) who makes an independent expenditure of more than $250 must file a report with the FEC. 2 U.S.C. 434(c). Renting these two billboards for six months clearly costs more than $250. There were are no reports of independent expenditures against President Obama filed with the FEC in July. The person or persons who paid for these billboards have violated 2 U.S.C. 434(c).

Second, because the billboards are independent expenditures, the billboards have to have a disclaimer that states the name and permanent street address, telephone number or World Wide Web address of the person or persons who paid for the billboard and include the statement that the billboard was not authorized by any candidate or candidate’s committee. 2 U.S.C. 441d(a)(3). This provision was designed specifically to prevent what happened here – allowing people to pay for a billboard that urges the public to vote against a federal candidate while remaining anonymous.

As Justice Scalia recently said, if you want to take part in a public debate you have to have some civic courage.

So, when I get home, I am filing against them at the FEC and then daring them to put on their big boy pants and meet me on the courthouse steps in Lufkin, Texas, because I’m a grown girl and I’m not ashamed of what I believe.

It looks like the whole rest of the GOP knows that Rick Perry running for President is Barry Goldwater with good hair.

One veteran GOP strategist said that multiple members of Congress had “expressed concerns about Perry’s ability to compete in not only the traditional 10 to 12 swing states, but also some of the lean-Republican states.”

The same state party chair, who spoke on condition of anonymity, voiced a worry that Perry hasn’t been “thoroughly vetted” and predicted: “If he’s the nominee, the first thing the White House is going to do is make an issue of secession.”

They also need to remember that Rick Perry refused to interview with newspaper editors or even to debate his opponent.  That might work in Texas but a poopie del pollo candidate for President might not cut it.

Can you imagine a 2.5 GPA at Texas A&M debating President Barack Obama?

Yeah, you can.  And it cracks you up.

I told you about this local wheelin-dealin a couple of weeks ago.  Both men denied it, but they are rightwing Super DeLux Brand Christians so their Bibles say it’s okay to lie about politics.

Rick Miller: Thug

Last night, Fort Bend County Republican Party Chairman and General Thug Rick Miller resigned his chairmanship.

You’d think that would be all the joy a girl could handle for one day.  But, his resignation letter, which is the same length as the United States Tax Code, had this amazing paragraph in it.

Our nation is under extreme attack, internally and externally. It will take more than a few of us to rise up and defend what we know to be true…protect and defend our liberty and freedoms…our very way of life and form of government. So my encouragement to each of you is to look closely at those who want to remove us from the “exceptionalism” that our nation has been known for…and to only put people in leadership positions who are there to truly serve the people and not be served…or who only want the positions for their own promotion or their own ego. We must have the right leaders who are willingly to sacrifice and take a stand…who will not be afraid to make the right decisions and do the right things for the right reasons…no matter what! These are the traits and actions of our Founding Fathers.

There are more code words than a Dan Brown novel in this email.  “Way of life,” and “Founding Fathers,” and “exceptionalism,”  those are code words for  white men.

Our local Republican party has not elected even one woman or one minority to office without “clerk” in front of their names since they accidentally elected one female judge – one and only one – in 1996.  They haven’t made that mistake since.

And why would the resigning Republican party chairman be so obvious with his code words?  Because the office he’s going to be  seeking is also being sought by an African American Republican woman.

This is the same Republican Party Chairman who would not speak out against an anonymous piece of hate mail  about a female Muslim running for office.  So, expect another anonymous piece of hate mail about his opponent being …. well, you know, not like us.

Sweet Jesus, forgive me, but I hate these jerks.  I just hate them.

Y’all go read Harold Cook on Rick’s hallelujahpolooza.

click right about here

I’ll have more tonight.

My friend Carl Whitmarsh runs the largest Democratic listserve in Texas.  He often gets hate mail but is a true connoisseur of what to share.

Here’s a great one he got today from someone who called himself Mike Steele.

Carl
I would like to say goodbye to you and all your sissy, liberal demoncrat friends. Our party has made your party look like the fools that they are all over the USA with the most recent cave in by your boy Obama. Straight Americans who love God and hate evil are back in charge so all you liberal rats are out. Maybe you all can move to France and sodomize one another.

Mike, I read the newspapers.  The sodomy line forms to the right.  Probably behind you.

(Sorry, Momma.  Damn good thing I’m on vacation.)