Thanks to Deb for this —
“Look, I’m not saying that that Rick Perry supporters are among the goofiest people on earth — no, no, wait a minute. That is what I’m saying. It’s exactly what I’m saying. Goofy. They have got a screw loose in their thinking assembly,” Juanita says.
“Honey, they say a closed mind gathers no new ideas. These people prove that. They are so narrow minded that they can see though a keyhole with both eyes.”
One of our customers, Jeromy, sent the latest shot of Sarah Palin’s hand – her shopping list.
No imitation Jesus here. No, sireee. This is the genuine thing.
This ad was in the Sunday newspaper, and since I was recently attacked by a railroad crossing arm, someone cut it out and left for me at the beauty salon.
Juanita doesn’t get it. If the copper works, why do you need Jesus? If Jesus works, why do you need copper ? It seems to her that you’re insulting either the copper or Jesus, maybe even both. And when you start messing with magical powers, mixing them like cheap liquor at a frat party, you ain’t asking for nothing but trouble.
Click here to see the whole thing in all its splendid glory.
Miss Verdelia, who is a charter member and front row sitter of the Greater Hope and Utopia Missionary Baptist Church, Footwashing Division, says this thing doesn’t work. She has seven of them if you want to try for yourself.
…. how she finally got through college.
Closer inspection of a photo of Sarah Palin, during a speech in which she mocked President Obama for his use of a teleprompter, reveals several notes written on her left hand. The words “Energy”, “Tax” and “Lift American Spirits” are clearly visible.
“Don’t you just love the scratch-out? And the armband with her name on it so she won’t forget that either.
Senator Richard Shelby (Republican Twit, Aladamnbama) is holding up all of President Barack Obama’s nominations until he gets these fiscally conservative, caring about the deficit, absolutely not pork earmarks —
– A $40 billion contract to build air-to-air refueling tankers. From CongressDaily: “Northrop/EADS team would build the planes in Mobile, Ala., but has threatened to pull out of the competition unless the Air Force makes changes to a draft request for proposals.”
– An improvised explosive device testing lab for the FBI. From CongressDaily: “[Shelby] is frustrated that the Obama administration won’t build” the center, which Shelby earmarked $45 million for in 2008. The center is due to be based “at the Army’s Redstone Arsenal.”
Sarcasm, just another of the free friendly customer services offered at Juanita’s.
(Thanks to Deb for the heads-up.)
Dora, for all that is holy, quit doing this kind of stuff. It’s illegal. A t-post cost $3.00. There are at least 20 of your signs in low income neighborhoods illegally attached to telephone polls. 
Right next to this sign was your opponent’s sign, complete with two t-posts.
Good Lord, Dora, HILLCO PAC gave you $1,500. If you’re going to take dirty money, buy some damn t-post with it.
You took $100 from Texas Alliance for Life PAC. Buy some t-posts.
You took $500 from the creepy Texas Consumer Finance Association PAC. Maybe they should have loaned you t-posts instead. You took $1,000 from Friends of Time Warner. Could you get movies of t-posts?
I notice that during the last election season, you paid $426 to the Texas Highway Department to reclaim your illegal signs they confiscated. Wouldn’t it be cheaper to Buy. Some. Damn. T-Posts?
