Vanity, Thy Name is Trump

February 07, 2018 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

New York Magazine.

Warning: You cannot unseen this.



Trump is a man obsessed with image in ways that go beyond the normal human concern with looking presentable. Image is Trump’s moral code. He dismisses his political rivals for being short. He sees his succession of wives as visual testament to his own status. He selects his Cabinet on the basis of their looking the part. He conscripts the military as a prop to bathe himself in an aura of presidential grandeur.

And no, we do not do Trump’s hair at The World’s Most Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc.  Nor would we. We have standards.

I mean, it ain’t like he’s Sampson, he can cut that stuff.

Not for the faint of heart —


Like seeing Vader without his helmet, right?

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.

Be Sociable, Share!

23 Comments to “Vanity, Thy Name is Trump”

  1. That Other Jean says:

    If Trump’s weird hair is a result of scalp-reduction surgery, as some news outlets have said, his scalp is probably scarred. Giving up the giant comb-over DA and admitting he’s bald would mean that his scarred scalp would be on display to the whole world. That’s likely more damaging to his ego than continuing with what he’s doing, even if everybody knows what’s going on. Image is everything to Donnie.

  2. Ya know – if he would just wear a normal hat (not that stupid baseball cap) he could avoid all of this – he might even look presidential – OMG – just made myself laugh.

  3. Ever since SNL long ago did a comedic commercial on The Shatner 5000, the world’s best toupee, I’ve figured that if I was famous or rich and bald (and wanted to not be publicly bald) I’d get hold of William Shatner and ask him who does his toppers. They’re fantastic.

  4. Jane & PKM says:

    All that so Dotard45 can claim he has his “own” hair? Vanity meet insanity. Certainly he could paste or glue on something more respectable and less prone to wind disaster.

    It has been said that Donnie wears his hair to honor his mother. Albeit it’s difficult to believe Donnie honoring anyone, but himself. But there is a remarkable resemblance, so maybe.

  5. easttxdem says:

    Oh, yuck! GROSS! You’d think he’d have sense enough to use massive amounts of hairspray to keep that mess tacked down.

  6. I think that’s really his butt. That’s how far his head is inserted.

  7. Oh, ARCH!!! First it was those pix from last year of his big butt in tennis shorts, no this! How much, O Lord, are we supposed to take!

  8. Ha, you guys beat me to the butt comments. I would prefer to see Donnie going than coming, but that really taxes our patience (not to mention our stomaches). Out the door is what I actually am waiting to see.

  9. Er…stomachs. Not a word I normally have to spell.

  10. joel hanes says:

    I wish Juanita _would_ do The Donald’s hair, but in a manner appropriate to his age.
    Very very short, almost military short.

  11. RE: “Like seeing Vader without his helmet”

    Well THANKS. How long will it take for that brain cell to die?? I’m soaking it in a rotation of Wild Turkey, Thunderbird, and Shiner to kill it dead. Dead I say.

    Heh heh heh

  12. With that sparse hair, he looks like Fire Marshall Bill.

  13. Eeeeeeeeek! That was the most horrific sight I’ve seen since Gollum. President Shithole is the absolute depth of ludicrosity. (I don’t know if that’s a word, but I like it.) When his hair is down he must look like a bassett hound with long floppy hair on the sides substituting for ears. And that gelatinous ass. Eeuuwwwwwww!!!!!

  14. publius bolonius says:

    According to Ivanna, he has what might be described as a modified ‘Friar Tuck’ with an inverted mullet. I’ve said too much.

  15. Tilphousia says:

    Ok ok. Enough already! First we saw the righty Whitford through the tennis shorts. That caused weeping. Then we got the image of traitor trump chasing a woman in just the skivvies. Add knashing of teeth. But this last is just so over the top I’m checking out the liquor closet.


  16. You might have thought he might have felt the wind on it and maybe at least reach up to try to hold it down. Or maybe he’s too afraid of the stairs to let go of the hand rails for that.

  17. Lunargent says:


    Somebody get that man a case of Industrial Strength AquaNet!

    Or Gorilla Glue.

    At least once a week, this shitshow of a government presents new challenges to my ability to suppress my gag reflex.

  18. TrulyTexan says:

    Lord almighty I did not need to see that this morning. Reminds me of Dan Aykroyds character in Nothing But Trouble.

  19. Yes, but Darth Vader redeemed himself in the end…

  20. The Other Jean: Maybe that scar on his scalp is from a failed brain transplant attempt.

  21. Just recalled something. Didn’t his quack New York City doctor prescribe him some meds to.thicken and regrow hair? Well, it isn’t working but why may be working very well are the side effects of those meds: that is, the Golden Gibbon’s behavior.

  22. WA Skeptic says:

    EWWWW–industrial brain bleach needed! There’s no way I am going to be able to unsee that–gah!


Leave a Reply