Tom DeLay: You Slept With Half The Cocktail Waitresses in Austin, You’re 68 Years Old, Pudgy, and Have Had At Least Two Face Lifts That I Know Of But Suddenly You’re Mahatma Gandhi?

June 08, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Y’all, seriously.

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“If this Supreme Court rules against marriage, all hell is going to break loose,” DeLay said, citing a pledge signed by politicians and activists, including Mike Huckabee and Rick Santorum, who have vow to defy such a ruling by the court. “We’re going to stand for marriage even if it takes civil disobedience.”

Okay think about this.  What are you gonna do?  Tie up gay people?  Throw spit wads?  Pee in their swimming pools?  When the preacher asks, “Does anyone here know any reason why …” you’re gonna yell out, “Sex!”

How do you defy marriage equality other than not marrying a gay person?  No, think about it.  That is exactly what you should do if you don’t like gay marriage.

Honey, the ruling will come down soon and I’m gonna keep my eye on Tom DeLay.  That’s a promise.

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30 Comments to “Tom DeLay: You Slept With Half The Cocktail Waitresses in Austin, You’re 68 Years Old, Pudgy, and Have Had At Least Two Face Lifts That I Know Of But Suddenly You’re Mahatma Gandhi?”


  1. First of all, SCOTUS would be ruling FOR marriage if they do what the reasonable among us are hoping for.

    Second, what the frack do you know about marriage, Tom?

    Third, if a ruling that people can marry the person they love is your idea of “all hell breaking loose,” I’d like to show you a few other places on Earth where it actually has.

    Republicans: it’s all about other people’s sex lives. Just don’t look at ours.

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  2. So in thir world, a pre-requisite for being President is vowing to ignore our system of checks and balances? And they call Barack Obama a dictator!

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  3. Corinne Sabo says:

    He doesn’t know what ‘civil’ means.

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  4. Sam in San Antonio says:

    An individual who knew DeLay well, told about the time Tom and the female principal of a middle school were having ‘relations’ in the back seat of a car. The auto wouldn’t start and they had to call for a ride back from Hoochie Koochie Heights. This was a regular for Tom according to my source, who also told about Delay’s proclivity for teenaged girls.

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  5. Fred Farklestone says:

    How soon do we find out Hot-Tub Tom is gay or at least bi-sexual?

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  6. I’m not going to get into Delay specifically. The hypocrisy of his life is what it is. As the post points out, what are you going to do? Every other time in human history when civil disobedience was used successfully it was done to expand rights, not reduce them. Oh, the irony.

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  7. GIndy51 says:

    Send his ass to Somalia if he wants to see hell on earth.

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  8. maryelle says:

    Talk about making a mountain out of a mole hill, these self-appointed Morals Masters are so busy hyping the base into a frenzy because they don’t want anybody to see that more people exercising their right to marry doesn’t affect them at all.
    All hell has already broken loose in this country and it’s muckrakers like DeLay who have created it. As if that sex-crazed jailbird was an authority on anything.

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  9. enid l. dunn says:

    What? Texas has a REAL J.R. Ewing?
    What an overindulged twat.
    He should stick to dancing. Maybe he will meet a nice guy. (gay.)

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  10. This may not be the time for a shouting manifesto, but..
    I don’t care if TD (or most anyone else) is gay, straight, or bi or celibate or not. I don’t understand the spectator interest and curiosity in others’ sex life.

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  11. TexasEllen says:

    The only marriage anyone ought to pay attention to is their own. It is enough to make that one work well and to bring a little joy into your own life.

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  12. So typical of the dirtbags. I think God already had her little laugh when DeLay was on that dancing show where the girl did all the work. Symbolic perhaps?

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  13. Sandridge says:

    Wasn’t ol’ “Hot Tub” Tommy DeL.a.y(anything in a skirt that moves) in real tight with good ol’ former SoH, perv, and wrasslin’ coach Denny Hastert?

    Hastert’s ‘problem’ seems to have been known about by some insiders, and iDeLay is/was the ultimate insider.
    Never a peep out of him about good ol’ boy Denny, eh?

    Wonder where he stands on the Duggar’s, esp Josh…oh…wait…no need to even ask.

    How the F*ck can a majority of ‘Murikkans look UP to these people?

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  14. How do you defy marriage equality other than not marrying a gay person?

    This. This silly “civil disobedience” thing seems to be a very popular talking point with the wing-nuts, but none of them ever seem to address this very obvious point.

    Certainly those who are currently public officials MIGHT be able to say they will refuse to do their damn jobs regarding gay weddings or benefits to same sex married families – and get their butts sued.

    But what the heck is an unemployed deadbeat like Tom DeLay going to do, anyway?

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  15. Hollyanna says:

    What a piece of work that man is! Can he not mind his own business, or does he just find it too galling that people who don’t agree with him are able to find happiness?

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  16. Ralph Wiggam says:

    To Republicans, civil disobedience just mean pouting in public.

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  17. Teh Gerg says:

    So, a ruling that lets more people get married is ‘against’ marriage. DeLay, you pathetic doofus.

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  18. Hardy the Large says:

    Ever wonder how much money these con artists rip from the duped masses with these pronouncements?! Bet a cut in social security would put quite a dent in their haul!
    Watch out, all you Cletus Spucklers! They’re after your butter and egg money!

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  19. Anyone else remember A Letter from a Birmingham Jail. The key line in the whole thing was that you must try negotiation first and then self-purification before resorting to civil disobedience. They seemed to have skipped those first two steps. I’ll give them a temporary pass on the first one seeing that they’d probably like to see homosexuals strapped to reprogramming chair, so allowing them to exist actually represents compromise in their own demented mind. The second requires a self awareness and humility they just aren’t capable of. Besides, is their honorable one among them that could lead the cause?

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  20. Please don’t insult the cocktail waitresses in Austin.

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  21. Marge Wood says:

    the Supreme Court is going to rule against marriage? I have to mull that over.

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  22. @Scott
    If a Teahadist, either an elected one or one of the carriers, were to purify, self or otherwise, there would be nothing left but a puff of wind on the order of an mosquito fart.

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  23. e platypus onion says:

    Tom Delay-time delay-time bomb-boom!!

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  24. AliceBeth says:

    Are you sure that half the cocktail waitresses in Austin were really willing to sleep with this creep???

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  25. I assumed that Cocktail waitresses would have better sense then to “socialize” with the bug killer.

    Are you sure you weren’t thinking of those involved in an even older profession?
    That I might believe.

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  26. Richard South of the Border says:

    So, what are Huckabee, DeLay, and Santorum going to do? None of them are civil judges. I suppose they could disrupt a courtroom or two before getting tossed in a slammer somewhere.

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  27. UmptyDump says:

    Now that’s just a crime against nature, JJ – putting the names of Tom DeLay and Mahatma Gandhi in the same headline.

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  28. maybe, if we’re really, really, really good, they’ll all hold their breath until they turn blue. then we just leave them there. think of it as a public good.

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  29. claudeewelch says:

    If Delay and his kind truly wish to preserve the “sanctity” of marriage, and if they are willing to resort to civil obedience to preserve it, when can we expect to see them on the steps of the Family Law Courts in Houston, Dallas, San Antonio and Fort Worth blocking the entrance ways and stopping the hundreds of divorces that are granted each week in those cities.

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