So you’re not going to believe this.  I checked it out every which way and I have come to believe that it’s true and not from a satire site.  But, it’s the kind of thing that makes you think satire sites are real.

Remember when Texas Governor Rick Perry held a giant ole ten-buggy prayer meeting to pray for rain?  Well, as rain is apt to do, it did rain about 6 months later and Rick Perry took a bow and claimed his prayer was answered.

Oklahoma Governor Mary Fallin, a Super DeLux Brand Christian who exercises by toting around a ton of sanctimony, has decided that Jesus gave us gas.  Well actually oil, but it’s the same thing.

It seems that the oil industry isn’t doing too well in Oklahoma because it doesn’t grow on trees, and since Republicans can’t possibly raise taxes on oil gazillionaires so they pay their fair share, the Governor decided to issue a proclamation in Jesus’ name.

Hold on.  I’m gonna let you read the whole damn thing because I believe, yes, I believe, in the power of crazy on a platter.

Whereas, Oklahoma is blessed with an abundance of oil and natural gas, allowing the state to be a prosperous producer of these valuable resources; and

Whereas Christians acknowledge such natural resources are created by God; and

Whereas the oil and gas industry continues to produce countless opportunities for wealth generation for Oklahoma families; and

Whereas Oklahoma recognizes the incredible economic, community and faith-based impacts demonstrated across the state by oil and natural gas companies; and

Whereas Christians are invited to thank God for the blessing created by the oil and natural gas industry and to seek His wisdom and ask for protection;

Now, therefore, I, Mary Fallin, Governor, do hereby proclaim October 13, 2016, as “Oilfield Prayer Day” in the state of Oklahoma.

Oilfield Prayer Day.  Honey, I have no idea why it wasn’t called “Jesus Give Us Some Magic Money and Pollute Our Air At the Same Time.”  Or even, “Jesus Gives Us Gas The Natural Way.”

Apparently, Oklahomans weren’t impressed with the water into wine or raising the dead.  That crap doesn’t pay worth a flip.  Jesus needs to be doing something useful.

I don’t know if the Governor is aware of this, but Oklahoma has become earthquake central due to fracking.  Maybe all the nonChristians in the state could have Earthquake Prayer Day.

Y’all, I didn’t make this up.  I’m not that funny.