Of Course He’s From Texas

December 31, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

I know it’s as frustrating as a Rubic’s cube when your computer doesn’t work and you have no idea how to fix it so you call a repairman and he doesn’t either.

But, damn, y’all.

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Okay, so this guy is named Joe Condello, who is the former Legislative Director for Texas Senator Kay Bailey Hutchison.  He called a tech to his house to fix his computer.  The tech said the computer needed a new part and he’d go fetch it at the store.  That’s when all hell broke loose.

Mondello told the tech ”you’re not leaving this house until the computer is fixed” — a feat that would be difficult to accomplish without the needed parts.  That’s when [he] decided a Second Amendment Solution was in order. He left the room and returned with a what appeared to be a gun, telling the tech:

”I’m going to kill you slowly.”

All the yelling brought his wife to the room, who stood between her husband and the tech so the tech could escape.

Now, I have great sympathy for people who get frustrated because the damn cowboy-forsaken computer machine won’t work.  However, I have found that threatening to kill the tech rarely increases their efficiency.

Come to find out, it was a toy gun.  The intention, however, was real as rain.

Now in case you’re wondering who calls a tech to their house instead of taking it in to the repair shop, I have an answer for that  — people who do not want other people to know what’s on their computer no matter what.

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.

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23 Comments to “Of Course He’s From Texas”

  1. No, no, you don’t shoot the tech, at least not the one who’s standing there. You threaten to shoot the tech on the other end of the phone, and you take an ax to the computer. So much more satisfying that way.

    And of course he needed to go back to the shop for a part. I have never had anybody come to the house who didn’t need to go back to the shop for a part, no matter how precisely I explained the problem.

  2. JJ, I’m one of those who is blessed with a tech/friend/neighbor, who will come to my house if I have computer problems.

    ‘Course I never threatened to shoot him, either. 🙂

  3. As the go-to tech guy for friends / family / neighbors I will disagree with JJ. The biggest reason that people don’t take their computers (desktop that is) to the repair shop is that they don’t know how to disconnect and more importantly reconnect all those pesky wires.

    That said, I can’t tell ya’ll how often someone asks me to look as some computer problem and then in a quiet voice asks me if I am going to be looking at all the files on their computer?

    Nooooo. Of course not. By which I mean, Yesssss, of course I am. I wasn’t but now I have to. I mean, you have a file labeled “plush porn.” Com’on people. You can’t just leave a folder like that on your desktop and not expect me to look and wonder what kind of freaky stuff you are into.

    Better hide my son’s stuffed animals.

    In those cases, I usually get them to buy a removable USB drive and caution them to put all their “important” files on that removable drive. You know, just in case.

  4. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    What a dork! Everyone knows you don’t aim a toy gun at the geek squad. It’s NERF all the way for nerds.

  5. John Peter Henson says:

    PKM……Bwahahahahahahaha……great now I have to clean tamales off my I-Pad.

  6. Just out of curiosity, are death threats illegal in Texas?

  7. I hope this pile of (expletive deleted) is in jail right now. He is at the very least guilty of kidnapping and terroristic threat. Of course being a GOP member means you can do whatever you want and pay nothing in consequences.

  8. Surprisingly, not in TX, although we do have the TX connection (both Dell and Kay Bailey Hutchinson). This was in Arlington, VA. http://patch.com/virginia/arlington-va/man-holds-computer-technician-hostage-say-police

  9. We need to get his wife two things. A Commendation for stepping between Bozo & the Tech so the Tech could escape and a good lawyer so she can rid herself of Bozo.

  10. JAKvirginia says:

    Thank you, lyntilla, for the link. My… and what a charming, uh, smile he has. Oh what am I being polite for? That pic needs a caption that says “Doh!”.

  11. Remember that computers bring peace and tranquility into your life! Post warranty, the store bought computer that I got (new) for my wife a couple of years ago, never worked without going to blue screen unannounced and at its own convenience. It became “my” computer in very short order. My patience and limited expertise finally exhausted, I ordered parts for a new computer with the intention of scrapping it. To punish me even further the malignant (Dell) computer has suddenly started working flawlessly without crashing. Am I happy?

  12. Anybody wonder why I don’t miss working with computers anymore? And my favorite “my 12 yr old neighbor is whiz with these things”. But does the little genius understand a Fortune 50 corporations supply chain? I think not but I do and more. Of course I was a triple threat Hardware, Software and System Analysis so i got thrice the disrespect.

  13. Marge Wood says:

    You raise some nerds of your own whom you can call and bribe with home-cooked fried chicken and mashed potatoes. They’ll be right over to fix your computer. Just don’t, DO NOT, take phone calls from suppposed tech support who tell you they will fix your computer or else they will get in and sabotage it. That was when I bought my own laptop and threatened anyone else who dared to touch it. Those techies on the phone hang up when they call and know it’s me.

  14. Annabelle Lee says:

    To be fair, he was dealing with a Dell.

  15. And that ain’t all! You should see how hard it is for Condello to keep a decent Gardener or Housekeeper.
    Or friends for that matter.

  16. My pal (formerly known as The Computer Guru) calls them Hell computers. We’re Mac people.

  17. Did anybody check to see if he had a license to carry a nerf gun? If so, they need to revoke it. Since VA took a step in the right direction, his nerf carry license won’t be accepted in several other states now.

  18. @Zyxomma – So with Dell Computer founded and still headquartered in Round Rock, I guess this is another of those in-state Texas messes that goes out and comes back around. The Second Amendment wingnuts will want to arm all the Dell people in Round Rock so they can protect themselves in case this doofus decides to drive down there. Or Dell can boost its security with a bunch of unemployed Waco biker gang members.

  19. @UmptyDump

    If the Stones, the Dead, and Jefferson Airplane can hire Hell’s Angels to do security, Dell should be able to hire Banditos or Cossacks to do their’s. Perfect circular logic!

  20. Heh! I forgot all about broken computers since I switched from Windoze to Apple. I get them little Mac Minis every five years or so, keep the keyboard, gradually jack up the monitor size…

  21. For context: Dell home technicians are subcontractors through one of several companies Dell contracts with, and sometimes even sub-sub-contracted through another middleman layer. They get paid very little per repair, like $20-$30 in many cases.

  22. Marge Wood says:

    Don’t know about death threats in Texas but in New York they are commonly used for disciplinary purposes. You know, “Keep your hands off the cookies or I’ll kill you.”

  23. Lunargent says:

    Forget the gun, albeit fake. This guy:

    Is a self-proclaimed Computer Expert who called and then threatened a member of the Geek Squad
    Is a lobbyist
    Used to work for Kay Bailey Hutchison (there’s your Texas connection, though this happened in Arlington, VA)

    Any one of those should justify locking the guy up.