I love the University of Texas.  Not only did they beat OU and bring home the Red River trophy, but they also made news in an even more important way.

Hundreds of students at the University of Texas at Austin will protest a new law that will allow more guns on campus not with signs or sit-ins, but by “strapping gigantic swinging dildos to our backpacks.”

Their mantra? #CocksNotGlocks

Yep.  The Texas Damn Legislature made a law saying that students can carry guns on campus at Texas universities.

UT students (most of them, unlike the legislature, have triple digit IQs) will start protesting the law when it goes into effect in August of next year.

They even have a Facebook page where you can see our best and brightest have fun with this and the knuckle draggers throw fourth grade hissy fit.

So we here at the World’s Most Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc. are going to come with a list of …

The Ways a Dildo is Better Than a Gun.

1. People are rarely killed while cleaning their dildos.

2. Using a dildo in a robbery might work as well as a gun.  “Open the cash register and I’ll use this” might invoke an open cash register.  You never know.

3. You still have to hide a dildo from your mother and your children so that one is a draw.

4. Like guns, comparing size would still be a thing.

5. You look almost as dumb waving around a dildo as you do with a gun.

6. Dildos come in delightful colors.  At least that’s what I am told.

7. Think of the money you’ll save on ammo.

Ok, Guys.  Ready, set, go.  (Keep it clean! We’re going for laughs, not gross outs.)

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Thanks to everybody for the heads up.