Ted Snooze and His Zombie Campaign

October 20, 2021 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Okay so here’s the deal.  If somebody runs for President and gets laughed out of the race (and you know that’s gotta be somebody from Texas after Rick Perry invented the category with “Oops!”), what happens to any campaign donations they have left over?


Well, the Federal Elections Commission wants to know, Ted Cruz.  Ted did not file his April or July quarterly reports for his presidential campaign funds and the FEC wants to know why.

I was going to post this yesterday but I got busy and I’m glad I did because Ted filed an answer. Remember: Ted does not make mistakes. He’s like Donald Trump and is always right. You can take a look at his creative writing to skirt around something by saying, “I’m special and not required to because of this nitpick.”

My opinion:  He’s running for president again but doesn’t want to say so and piss off Donald Trump.

 

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0 Comments to “Ted Snooze and His Zombie Campaign”


  1. Opinionated Hussy says:

    Wow. “You didn’t cite chapter and verse on why we’re required to say what we plan to do with the money, so we won’t tell you.

    “p.s. yes, we know this doesn’t answer why we failed to file an FEC report, but we hope you’ll forget that part of it.”

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  2. Grandma Ada says:

    Is he still spending $22K per month for 24/7 in person security for his house? miss JJ, I dream of the day that you have a headline that starts,” Former Senator Ted Cruz Said From Jail . . . “

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  3. G Foresight says:

    As long as the there continues to be little to no consequences for illegal / questionable behavior, why would Ted or Bannon or, (pick another name from the GQP roster), change? They get re-elected and walk free.

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  4. Steve from Beaverton says:

    It would look really bad that he spent residual campaign funds to visit Cancun, wouldn’t it?
    That nose makes his face look thinner and less scruffy than last I saw him in his As(tro)s jersey.

    4
  5. Sandridge says:

    I’m wishing/speculating how it was first delineated, but there’s a really nasty parasite protozoa named “T. cruzi [Trypanosoma cruzi]”, endemic to the American SW and warm regions worldwide.
    The primary vector is the blood-sucking ‘kissing bug’, which spreads T. cruzi from it’s feces, yuck.
    Check out the Wiki, it’ll scare your socks off, just like DetesTed:
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trypanosoma_cruzi

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  6. Or,
    “I couldn’t type with my hand stuck in the cookie jar.”

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