Maybe This Is The Pussy Trump Should Have Grabbed

June 22, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Everybody’s favorite bad liar and gotta-be-on-drugs to act like he does, Devin Nunes, is loudly burping out of his mouth again.

But whatever drugs he’s taking has not helped with his paranoia.  His rambling interview at a local rightwing radio station is an adventure in persecution complexities.

By the way, he has also caught that thing that Trump has hugely bigly.

Nunes was then asked why an all-Republican Congress was not passing more legislation. He corrected the caller, saying the House, Senate and Trump have signed more bills into law than any previous Congress/presidential combination in history up to this point.

Oh, that might be a tiny exaggeration.

But, here’s the part that got me.  Nunes says that he can’t possibly have town halls because, you know, citizens might show up and we can’t be having that.  Do you know why?

“The last thing we’re going to do is give in to a lot of left-wing activists and media,” Nunes said. “And with these security situations, I don’t know how any member of Congress can do a town hall.”

Security situations?  What the hell is that? Do you want to know who shows up in person and walks along a rope line shaking hands?  Gabby Gifford, that’s who.

Nunes is a coward.

Go read the interview linked above.  The guy is nine cents short of a dime.

‘Cuz We Don’t Need No Damn Guvment!

June 13, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Front page of the Houston Chronicle this morning: Budget Cuts

 

 

This ain’t gonna improve none at all.

Despite a two-year budget of $2.4 billion, the Texas Department of Public Safety, with little notice, has reduced office hours at 11 of the state’s busiest driver’s license offices and plans to lay off more than 100 full-time employees to deal with a $21 million funding crunch.

The statewide police agency’s primary function is to patrol state highways and issue driver’s licenses, but in recent years has spent hundreds of millions on security operations along the 1,200-mile border with Mexico.

That ain’t your job, DPS.  Patrolling the border is Donald Trump’s job.

The last time I renewed my driver’s license, I had to go in person. I had to wait in line for 3 hours. Now it’s going to get worse. Yippee!

Thank you, Republicans.

 

Wait! Wait! Where Was I?

June 13, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Newt is back again, y’all.  He’s doing the Twitter thing, too.

May 17, 2017

 

26 days later on June 12, 2017

 

 

Rethinking Made Easy: people only have integrity and honesty if they side with Dear Leader Trump and his groveling toady Newt.

Thanks to Bryan for the heads up.

The Luv Guv

April 06, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Alabama Republican Governor Robert Bentley is in a heap of trouble, especially for a guy who claims he’s a Sunday School teacher.

He was an active member of First Baptist Church Tuscaloosa where he served as a deacon and a Sunday School teacher. At FBC Tuscaloosa, he has been the chairman of the board of deacons four times and a member of the Youth for Christ advisory board as well as the Family Counseling advisory board. Bentley was the 2009 recipient of the Christian Coalition of Alabama’s Statesmanship Award.

From there, we go directly to … oh, you know what’s coming already.

The 73 year old governor was having an affair with his top political advisor, Rebekah Mason.  He set up a non-profit with his campaign funds and was paying Mason through the non-profit.  Mason, who like Bentley is married, resigned last year over the revelation that they were doing … well, the wild thing.

This morning, the Alabama Ethics Commission, and yes, they do have one of those, announced that it has found probable cause that Bentley had violated campaign ethics rules and yes, they have those, too.

The commission said it “found probable cause to believe” Bentley violated the Alabama Ethics Act and Fair Campaign Practices Act — which is the state’s campaign finance law — after a yearlong investigation. The commission referred the matter to the Montgomery County District Attorney’s Office.
Intentional violations of the two acts are Class B felonies, which is punishable by a prison sentence of between two and 20 years for each violation. A fine of up to $20,000 could also be levied for each violation.
His wife of 50 years left him.  His young, pretty girlfriend went back to her husband. He might be going to prison. His dog died and he can’t pay his bar tab.  Okay, so I made up the last part, but when your life is a country western song …

Hey, Y’all, It’s Sexy Time!

February 10, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Y’all surely remember Ken Starr, the guy who just couldn’t stop thinking about Bill Clinton getting a consensual blow job?

The job he got after that was President of Baylor University, the Baptist Blackboard in Waco, where he disgraced himself and Baylor over … yeah, s-e-x.

Starr, a former judge and lawyer, was ousted by Baylor in 2016 amid the school’s infamous sexual assault scandal. He had been accused of severely mishandling the situation, which was brought to the school’s attention in 2015 after a pair of football players were convicted.

What it boiled down to is that he couldn’t stop being horrified by consensual sex but forced sex was fine and dandy with him.

He was asked to leave Baylor.  So, after failing miserably at two jobs, he’s primed and ready to serve in the Trump administration.

Ken Starr — the disgraced ex-president of Baylor University — is being considered for a post in the Trump administration, a report said Thursday night.

The 70-year-old Texan is currently a front-runner to lead the Office of International Religious Freedom, according to Foreign Policy.

Lemme see here – the former President of Baylor wants worldwide religious freedom?  You mean like freedom to be a Baptist or a Methodist?

 

A New Retirement Plan

February 08, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Carly Fiorina has decided to spend her heavily tarnished golden years traveling around the country running for office.

Former Republican presidential candidate Carly Fiorina on Monday told a local Virginia radio show that she’s considering running for the U.S. Senate seat in Virginia in 2018.

Yeah, she thinks she’s going to run against Tim Kaine.

Rumor has it that Barbara Boxer is laughing her butt off.

If this doesn’t work out for Caryl, maybe she could start going to states alphabetically.  You know, go to Alabama and learn to eat cornbread.  Next to Alaska and learn to field dress a moose. Then to Arizona and run against McCain. Then to Arkansas to learn … well, nothing. Skip California – been there, done that. Smoke some weed in Colorado. Hey, you get the idea.