The Daily Newt

December 30, 2011 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Bless his heart, Noot has gone from testy to creepy in 60 seconds or less.

Now he’s claiming he’s middle class.Ā  Because everybody in the middle class has a half million dollar line of credit at Tiffany’s, vacations on a Greek cruise, and scams the government out of millions of dollars.

While criticizing Michael Bloomberg for “buying” his mayoral position in New York, Newt said —

My dad served in the Army for 27 years; I was a college teacher. Iā€™m a middle class person,ā€ Gingrich said.

Dude, you are not middle class just because your wife looks like she’d fit right in at the bowling alley in Lufkin.

Thanks to Stephen for the heads-up.

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8 Comments to “The Daily Newt”


  1. Newt is middle class, and George Clooney is my boyfriend. (Man, how I wish the latter WERE true!!) šŸ˜‰

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  2. Sometimes my ears and eyes just bleed.
    Newt is middle class, Mitt is middle class . . . .

    By those measures the majority of the “reality based” middle class would never eat, own a tv(much less computers) live inside a building and would know nothing of these “middle classed” candidates because we’d be too busy foraging the highways and byways for scraps of food and wearing Newt’s discarded Tiffany credit card receipts as shoes.

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  3. TexasEllen says:

    Newt now seems to have decided to engage in a weep-off with Boehner. We have moved from clown car to the Gong Show.

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  4. Do you know any middle class people who brag about being paid $60,000 for a 45 minute speech? Nope, you don’t as that would be “no class” people.

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  5. This is the real reason why America’s middle class feel threatened. People like this are goin’ a-slummin’. And yes, Callista, you really can find lotsa meth (you know, to better keep that google-eyed, spooky expression) and the bowling alley in Lufkin. That’s probably where Laura Bush had to get her refills.

    Oh– wait– meth is so middle class– those are real cocaine eyes!

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  6. Okay, I’m SO effing sorry to interrupt the conversation.

    But I actually live in Lufkin now (yeah, it sucks).

    And the biggest problem I have — besides the fact that every one here is a freaking fundie — is that I can’t get a decent haircut.

    HELP.

    Pleasel

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  7. Call Laura & Co. in Nacogdoches for an appointment and your hair cut problem will be solved. I’ve lived in Nacogdoches and Lufkin and don’t want to offend my Lufkin friends but I preferred Nacogdoches. Newt hasn’t known what middle class was since childhood.

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  8. Kenneth:

    Thanks for the advice, but to be honest, I can’t be spending an hour every week just to get my hair cut. (30 min each way). There must be some one in Lufkin that can cut hair. This isn’t rocket science for goodness sake.

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