That Settles It. Antonin Scalia Is Living Proof That You Don’t Have To Have a Big Prick To Be One

June 26, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Sorry, Momma, but I strained and strained to find another way to say this but it just wasn’t there.

In Scalia’s dissenting opinion, he doesn’t slam marriage equality but choses instead to be a prissy little snot about Justice Kennedy’s opinion.  His attack on Kennedy personally was beneath the dignity of the court and shows how this little man has deteriorated into some manner of totally smug insanity.

Get this

Screen Shot 2015-06-26 at 10.28.41 AM“The opinion is couched in a style that is as pretentious as its content is egotistic,” he writes. “If, even as the price to be paid for a fifth vote, I ever joined an opinion for the Court that began: ‘The Constitution promises liberty to all within its reach, a liberty that includes certain specific rights that allow persons, within a lawful realm, to define and express their identity,’ I would hide my head in a bag. The Supreme Court of the United States has descended from the disciplined legal reasoning of John Marshall and Joseph Story to the mystical aphorisms of the fortune cookie.”

I am certain that Justice Kennedy is not offended by crap like that but it’s just embarrassing.

And then he seems to forget the court overturning the will of the people in Bush v. Gore.

“And to allow the policy question of same-sex marriage to be considered and resolved by a select, patrician, highly unrepresentative panel of nine is to violate a principle even more fundamental than no taxation without representation: no social transformation without representation,” he writes. “But what really astounds is the hubris reflected in today’s judicial Putsch.”

Ya think Justices Sotomayor, Kagan, and Ginsburg are having coffee this morning and giggling their butts off at this old fool?  I know I am.

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0 Comments to “That Settles It. Antonin Scalia Is Living Proof That You Don’t Have To Have a Big Prick To Be One”


  1. Scalia is a pox on the nation as is his puppet Thomas. They should pack Alito up in a bag and head elsewhere.. they disgrace our nation.

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  2. I may not be a cactus expert, but I know a prick when I see one.

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  3. The best revenge, in my opinion, is for both Thomas and Scalia to leave the Court, by whatever means, during a Democratic administration.

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  4. TexasEllen says:

    Yesterday he was complaining about jiggery-pokery reasoning and today he demonstrated it. Enough of Scalia. He should go home He’s drunk.

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  5. Hollyanna says:

    Love your headline. Surely Momma will understand and forgive. It is so apt!

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  6. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Aw geez folks, go light on Fat Tony. He’s still butt hurt that his parents made it possible for him to go to law school. He mourns for the day his dream of becoming a mafia don exploded. He remembers the good old days of blood everywhere and confession on Sunday to cleanse his soul. When the Libertarian dream meets Opus Dopey, stand aside and allow these hapless victims to hoist themselves on their own petard or cross of their choosing.

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  7. Patience. The man will soon stroke out.

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  8. “Jiggery – pokery” sounds like some sort of strained euphemism used by people who don’t like to mention s – e – x.

    Closer to home, we have Harris County Clerk Stan Stanart, who announces that, oh gosh, he’ll have an updated marriage license application just as soon as the state gives it to him… right above depictions and descriptions of his very own “romantically” redesigned marriage licenses. http://www.cclerk.hctx.net/Personal_Rec/Marriage_License_Information.aspx

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  9. Marcia in CO says:

    If he is going to hide his head in a bag … we can hope it’s a plastic one!!

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  10. Marcia: You made me laugh out loud!

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  11. Is he on Koch?

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  12. June Bug says:

    He looks just like my mean grandmother..the crazy one. His heart is as ugly as his outside.

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  13. austinhatlady says:

    Travis County Clerk started issuing licenses at 10:30. She’d announced extended hours several weeks ago.Texas AG is talking like Scalia. Now where did Glen Mackey say there would be celebrations?

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  14. Scalia is one player on a summer league baseball team, The Judges. He also thinks he’s the coach, even though… there is no coach. He tries to tell everyone else how to play, but except for Clarence Thomas playing far right field, they mostly ignore him.

    What really ticks off Scalia is that despite his game long rambling play calling, the team mostly wins. In fact they’ve been on a week long winning streak. He can barely contain himself, so he gets out his English English Dictionary and writes late into the night.

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  15. At least he has had a lot of practice recognizing “a style that is as pretentious as its content is egotistical.” All he has to do is read his own writing. Hubris, thy name is Scalia.

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  16. Annabelle Lee says:

    Also, is Scalia calling for Affirmative Action and quotas for SCOTUS? He certainly seems to be.

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  17. Marcia wins the Internet today!

    When I saw that Scalia had called anybody else in the world “pretentious” and “egotistic,” My immediate response was, “Pot, meet kettle.”

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  18. Aggieland Liz says:

    Oh good grief, of course fat Tony would know NOTHING about egotism now would he?! He better start worrying about the beam stuck in his eye…

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  19. For years, Tony and Clarence have been an embarrassment to most Americans. They fit right in with the Clown Circus known as the Tea Baggers.

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  20. Wayne Larson says:

    Tony’s Lament
    (To the tune of I’m a Yankee Doodle Dandy)

    I have a dinky-dinky winky
    Dinky winky it is I …
    Who goes through life with my head in a bag
    Since I’ll never marry a fag
    I’m hitched to a very patient sweetheart
    Who tells me that I’m her sexy toy
    Dinky winky tries its hardest
    Bat fails to keep her happy
    ‘Cause I am a dinky winky boy!

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  21. Take heart, people. A possibility of a glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel is when Scalia goes, his Clarence Thomas appendage goes with him. One can fervently hope.

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  22. Careful there with the foam and spittle Fat Tony. If you insist on going all apoplectic on us I recommend Marcia’s suggestion that you use a plastic bag. Not that you care about us peons, it makes the clean up so much easier.

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  23. AlanInAustin says:

    I have no problem with Scalia hiding his head in a bag.

    I just ask that it be plastic, with no holes, and include a twistie to ensure an airtight seal.

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  24. Marcia in CO says:

    Thank you everyone … Jan, Rhea, RA … putting a plastic bag over his ugly head … it was the only thing that came to mind!!

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  25. daChipster says:

    Protip: As you read the dissents of the wingnut Justices, and the comments of folks like SkyPilot McGodgrifter, substitute “slavery” and “black” any time you see “same-sex marriage” and “gay.”

    It’s uncanny the parallels between the Rightistas of today and the Rightistas of yesteryear. Justice Roger Taney and Rev. Fred Ross sound a lot like Scalia and Huckabee.

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  26. Aggieland Liz says:

    @Wayne Larson, love the dinky winky ditty, but I’m pretty sure Tony is going by memory-he can’t have seen that poor lil thing for YEARS now 😛

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  27. RepubAnon says:

    We are seeing the Republican marketing department’s reaction, though: just as overturning “Roe v Wade” became a Republican theme, so will overturning Obergefell. Let’s not relax our guard, least we see the right to marriage suffer the same fate as the right to an abortion.

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  28. I’d be proud and happy to be the first one to accept your resignation, Tony.

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  29. daChipster says:

    SCARY STUFF

    Building off what I wrote earlier: Here are some passages from Taney’s writing of the Dred Scott v Sandford decision. You’ll notice it relies on strict constructionism and states rights, utterly ignoring the full faith and credit clause of Article IV Section 1. That’s slop for a pig like Scalia to wallow in.

    I’ve substituted gay into the language, it sounds like today.

    A [gay person / free negro of the African race, whose ancestors were brought to this country and sold as slaves] is not a “citizen” within the meaning of the Constitution of the United States

    When the Constitution was adopted, they were not regarded in any of the States as members of the community which constituted the State, and were not numbered among its “people or citizens.” Consequently, the special rights and immunities guarantied to citizens do not apply to them. And not being “citizens” within the meaning of the Constitution, they are not entitled to sue in that character in a court of the United States, and the Circuit Court has not jurisdiction in such a suit.

    […]

    This court has heretofore decided that the status or condition of a [gay person / person of African descent] depended on the laws of the State in which he resided.

    The change in public opinion and feeling in relation to [the African race / same-sex marriage] which has taken place since the adoption of the Constitution cannot change its construction and meaning, and it must be construed and administered now according to its true meaning and intention when it was formed and adopted.

    Now check out this drop in on the quote JJ posted in her article above.

    “And to allow the policy question of [African citizenship/same-sex marriage] to be considered and resolved by a select, patrician, highly unrepresentative panel of nine is to violate a principle even more fundamental than no taxation without representation: no social transformation without representation,”

    And how about this, also from Scalia’s dissent:

    “[R]egulation of [slavery / domestic relations is an area that has long been regarded as a virtually exclusive province of the States.”

    Sounds eerily similar, amirite?

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  30. daChipster, Taney’s statue on the grounds of the Maryland State House is one of the things that I’d like to see gone. I walked past that thing often when I was in college in Annapolis, and gave it the finger every time. Marylander Harriet Tubman would be a much better replacement.

    As for the sealed plastic bag over Scalia’s head, can we please make it opaque? I don’t want to see his face get uglier as he suffocates.

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  31. Braxton Braggart says:

    “I am certain that Justice Kennedy is not offended by crap like that but it’s just embarrassing.”

    Justice Kennedy, like the other justices, is used to Scalia’s canolli-scented histrionics.

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  32. Barbara Elliott says:

    The reds states will now begin to flood their legislatures with “Religious Freedom” laws.

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  33. As for rights, there is an island in the Pacific that is actually American but the islanders are not allowed to vote. The prohibition against voting was supposed to only be temporary but apparently it was easy to forget. I really would like to see these people vote in the next presidential election. Congress, that was a nudge!

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  34. e platypus onion says:

    After Scalia expires with his head in an opaque plastic bag.please recycle opaque plastic bag for Clarence Thomas to suffocate in. Think of the environment.

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  35. Marge Wood says:

    He sure knows lots of big words, doesn’t he. You suppose he knows what they all mean?

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  36. Corinne Sabo says:

    Scalia is an anal orifice.

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  37. Jim Maughan says:

    It’s going to be fun watching the wingnuts heads exploding.
    The even better news is that there won’t be much to clean up.

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  38. Old Mayfly says:

    what daChipster said!

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  39. Linda Phipps says:

    Well, Scaley can add “buggery jokery” to his “jiggery pokery” can’t he. What an insightful has been.

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  40. maryelle says:

    Since Scalia says that “I would hide my head in a bag”, we should all start sending him bags. Can you imagine him receiving millions of bags with the words Hide Your Head on them?

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  41. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Y’all send bags. I’ll locate a case of plastic construction ties that will fit around his fat neck to secure the bags.

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  42. Oh, this guy is just so moral and just! He worked like a dog to pull all the right strings to get his son a good government job. No hoops for sonny to jump through like the rest of us peons!

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  43. UmptyDump says:

    maryelle, the bags won’t have to be very big to fit over a pinhead. Given what JJ called him, maybe a condom. It would fall off anyplace else.

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  44. I have been around for a few decades and I have never seen any pathetic attention-mongers to equal Scalia anad Trump. They are both pathological with their constant “Me, me, me.”

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  45. Can the 4 ahole Justices say MENTAL DEMENTIA!!!
    You are there to judge the constitutionality of actions and other rules, not put your book ‘BS up front!!!

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  46. e platypus onion says:

    This belligerent,bloviating,blob of bluster has a face even his Mother couldn’t love.

    Scalia,”I won’t stand for anymore of this non-sense in my court.” Fine,Tony,sit down and STFU! Problem solved. Now go away.

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  47. It seems that we here are not Scalia’s only avid fans. Roberts actually cited Scalia in the arguments for marriage equality. In a dry, intelligent way, it’s a blast:http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/wonkblog/wp/2015/06/25/chief-justice-roberts-quiet-burn-on-scalia-in-the-obamacare-decision/

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