Democratic Party Strategy: Hoping for a Unicorn

June 20, 2017 By: El Jefe Category: Congress, Dammit!

Democrats are stupid.  Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.  Ossoff, a political neophyte and mere child, lost by 6% f*cking points against a 55 year old veteran conservative.  And he spent TWENTY FIVE MILLION HARD EARNED DOLLARS for the privilege.  TWENTY FIVE MILLION DOLLARS. In a district held by Republicans for FORTY YEARS.  That’s just goddamned stupid.  The Democrats are so desperate for a win that they ran a little leaguer against a popular local journeywoman and got their asses kicked, deservedly so.  Did they really believe this kid could win?  Oh, please.

The same thing happened in other races tonight, where the Repubs virtually swept the special elections, and the talking heads on MSNBC are rationalizing “how close” they came.  Stupid.  What a waste of time, money, and brain cells.  The Dems continue to swing for the fences with a 12 oz. bat.  That’s stupid, too.  The party hasn’t groomed solid candidates in God-knows-how-long, and everyone is crying in their beer tonight that the golden-haired boy lost to a tea bagging weirdo.  Is anyone surprised?

Well, here’s the bad news, kids…you can’t turn an entire political movement inside out with a unicorn.  You have to start at the local level and build, build, build.  And for God’s sake, stop pouring generational wealth into candidates who don’t have a snowball’s chance in hell of even making a showing.

Jesus…

(sorry, Momma)

 

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Say What?

June 16, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Okay, I am sort of ashamed to say this but … I know lots of lawyers.  However, they are a worthless lot of writ twits because not even one of them can explain to me what this means.

“Americans should exercise caution before accepting as true any stories attributed to anonymous ‘officials,’ particularly when they do not identify the country — let alone the branch of agency of government — with which the alleged sources supposedly are affiliated. Americans should be skeptical about anonymous allegations. The Department of Justice has a long established policy to neither confirm nor deny such allegations.”

That’s Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein explaining God only knows what.

One lawyer suggested that it mean that Rosenstein can take presidential dictation very well.

 

Okay, Stop With the Hitler

April 13, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Learning absolutely diddle squat from the Hitler Festivities hosted by Sean Spicer, North Carolina Republican state representative Larry Pittman just compared Abraham Lincoln to Hitler.

No damn freekin’ kidding, y’all.

As a sophomore letterman on the Facebook Debating Society, Pittman dropped this jewel when a commenter reminded Pittman that gay marriage is now the law and that Pittman should “get over it,” instead of wasting time repeatedly trying to re-introduce it to ban it.

Pittman’s response: “And if Hitler had won, should the world just get over it? Lincoln was the same sort (of) tyrant, and personally responsible for the deaths of over 800,000 Americans in a war that was unnecessary and unconstitutional.”

By the way, Pittman is the pastor of Ridgecrest Presbyterian Church in Stanly County.

Hitler: everybody you disagree with is just like him.

Big Bend Border Wall? Stupid.

March 16, 2017 By: El Jefe Category: Sumbitches, Trump

Cheeto Jesus is apparently eying Big Bend National Park for his border wall because it’s federal land.  The problem is that God already beat him to it:

Apparently to our, uh… (urp) president, if he can’t see it from Cheeto Tower, it’s all flat to him.

Stupid.

Nominee for Education Secretary: “Guns Needed in Schools to Protect from Grizzlies”

January 17, 2017 By: El Jefe Category: Dammit!, Holy Crap

Yep, Betsy DeVos actually said it. We need guns in schools to protect from grizzlies.

urp…President Elect Calls for Close Ties With…Russia

January 07, 2017 By: El Jefe Category: Trump

One day after receiving damning intelligence reports of direct and intentional espionage against the United States, Cheeto Jesus called for closer relations with Russia and that those who opposed are “stupid” and “fools”.  When Putin hands His Orangeness his own ass on a platter, we’ll know both the fool and the stupid.