Day of Distraction

January 05, 2018 By: El Jefe Category: Russian Hacking, Trump

Michael Wolff’s new book is dominating the airwaves and has all week.  Except on Fox Noise, of course.  The release date of the book was moved up to today, and Trumpland is doing everything it can do to increase sales, including threatening the author and his publisher as well as slandering everyone who spoke ill of Trump.  Steve Bannon, the Darth Vader of political strategy, has been renamed Sloppy Steve by His Orangeness.  Amongst all this firestorm, other news has been announced today, and the timing is just a little coinkydink:

The FBI has announced that it has reopened an investigation of the Clinton Foundation.  This comes after months of Trump screaming about “Crooked Hillary”, and demanding the FBI investigate what’s already been investigated ad nauseam. Word got out today of the investigation, apparently leaked by, you guessed it, congressional Republicans.  Second, Senate Republicans have made the very first criminal referral in connection to the Russia interference investigations against…wait for it…Christopher Steele, the retired British intelligence agent who wrote the famous dossier about Trump’s relationship with the Russians.  That’s right, folks…the VERY FIRST CRIMINAL REFERRAL from Republicans in the Trump-Russia investigation is against the guy trying to expose Trump’s collusion with the Russians.

The fact that these two announcements come on the same day as the release of Fire and Fury is, like I said already, purely a coninkydink.  Nothing to see here…move along.

Still Blaming Bernie

August 24, 2017 By: El Jefe Category: 2016 Election, Flamethrower

Yesterday, Newsweek published a story accusing Bernie voters of tipping the 2016 election to Trump.  It uses data from the 2016 Cooperative Congressional Election Survey, compiled by Political Wire, that showed that, indeed, 10% of Bernie primary voters went for Trump in the general. It then goes into a swing state analysis that showed that Trump’s winning margin was less than the Bernie’s voters who went for Trump.  The implication was clear – stubborn Bernie voters wrecked Hillary’s bid for the presidency.  How evil they were and inconsiderate of Hillary and all of her supporters.  Fair enough.

There was an interesting mention, though, of a few not insignificant details at the very end of the article…First, the 10% of Bernie voters that went for Trump paled in comparison to the TWENTY FIVE percent of Hillary voters who went for McCain in 2008 (hypocrisy, anyone?).  More important, and one that I hadn’t realized was so large, was that almost 30% of Bernie voters were actually self identified Republican or leaned Republican.  Conversely, Hillary only attracted about 6 or 7% of the same demographic.

So, was it Bernie and his evil bots who wrecked Hillary’s election, or was it actually the fact that Hillary failed to attract the same demographic that Bernie did?  Trump certainly attracted a wide demographic of support.  Bernie attracted a wide demographic of support.  Hillary simply did not.  So, should the headline of the Newsweek article have been BERNIE SANDERS VOTERS HELPED TRUMP WIN AND HERE’S PROOF,  or should it have been HILLARY CLINTON LOST BECAUSE SHE FAILED TO ATTRACT A WIDER DEMOGRAPHIC THAN TRUMP?

I know the answer, but Hillary’s supporters, and many in the party, still cling to the myth that Bernie wrecked her election.  The inconvenient truth is that the numbers are the numbers and they speak for themselves; this lesson must be learned by the Democratic party lest it have to re-learn it in 2020.

I’m not holding my breath.

 

 

You’re Not the Boss of Me

April 13, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Oklahoma Republican Congressman (you’re already cringing, aren’t you?) Markwayne Mullin had a town hall meeting in his district, where is was reminded that we pay his salary.

That just pissed him off.  He was spitting nails and sawing steel.

“You say you pay for me to do this? That’s bullcrap,” Mullin said at the town hall in Jay, Okla., according to a video of the incident.

“I pay for myself. I paid enough taxes before I got here and continue to through my company to pay my own salary. This is a service. No one here pays me to go,” he added.

After constituents pushed back, Mullin reiterated that being a lawmaker is not “how I make my living.”

When he calmed down and realized a day later that he sounded like a real butthole (plus, he couldn’t explain why he takes the salary we give him), he had his poor little spokeswoman tell everybody …

“The congressman reiterates in the video that his work as the representative of the Second District of Oklahoma is a service,” Lawrence said.

“His aspiration is to be a career legislator and not a career politician. He is not, nor does he ever aspire to be, a career politician. His priority will always be to serve his constituents to the best of his ability.”

And the difference between a career politician and a career legislator would be …. spelling?

The best I can figure is that the congressman thinks he’s doing his constituents a favor by screwing them.

I think he attended the Sean Spicer School of ‘Splainin’ Things.

 

Good Morning, Lady Karma of Hypocrisyville

March 22, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

The former chair of the Colorado Republican Party and current rightwing talk radio host (translation: he’s so unsexy that he couldn’t get laid at the Chicken Ranch with a hen under each arm and a fifty dollar bill taped to his forehead), has had a visit from the Karma Fairy.

Steve Curtis spend a portion of his radio show before the November election screaming about voter fraud.

“It seems to me,” Curtis said in the 42-minute segment, “that virtually every case of voter fraud I can remember in my lifetime was committed by Democrats.”

There was “something about being a Democrat,” he said, that made people prone to criminal behavior. At multiple points, the two brought up fraudulent mail-in ballots and “double voting” specifically.

Yeah, he’s been accused of voter fraud.  Here he is, a self-described Tea Party Patriot, misusing mail-in ballots.

It seems that Curtis filled out his ex-wife’s ballot and mailed it in for her because she had divorced him and moved to South Carolina.  She called Colorado to find out how she could vote and they told her that her completed ballot had already been mailed.

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.

Trump Found Texas

February 07, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Asset forfeiture is a damn mess in Texas.  Law enforcement can seize the property of those arrested for a crime and have not been found guilty.  That means that they can take your stuff without due process.

Law enforcement says it really, really helps them with convicting drug dealers and terrorists.

Yeah, but … it would also help them convict me if I was arrested with trumped up (see what I did there?) charges. If they took all my assets, I couldn’t hire a lawyer or an investigator, eat actual food before trial, or pay the electricity bill.

The sheriff of Rockwall County, Texas (think suburb of Dallas) went to the White House and met with Trump.  Trump loves asset forfeiture and, coincidently, so does the sheriff.

Trump announced to the public at this meeting that he would like to know the name of the state senator supporting reforming asset forfeiture …

 “President Donald Trump invited the sheriff of a small Texas County to ‘destroy’ the career of a state senator who sought to ban a controversial law enforcement practice by naming the lawmaker during a White House meeting.”

The issue is being debated in the Texas State Senate. Republican State Senator Konni Burton and Democratic State Senator Juan “Chuy” Hinojosa are the two people leading this fight in the Texas Senate.

Being that Konni represents a district near the sheriff’s county, and she is the Republican fighting for due process, it’s most likely that Konni is the one who Trump wants to destroy. Of course, Konni is a woman so destroying her puts another notch in Trump’s belt.

Sumbitch.

Look, I am no Konni Burton cheerleader. She’s anti-choice and kisses up to Greg Abbott, but for Trump to use the White House to “destroy” a damn state senator he doesn’t even know, is … yeah, crazy. It’s crazy.

I don’t think Trump meant Democratic State Senator Chuy Hinojosa.  Chu is a damn American hero and Trump couldn’t touch him with a fifty foot pole. In fact, Chuy might use “Trump wants to destroy me” on his campaign literature.

Thanks to Kyle for the heads up.

I’m Not Getting Paid. Are Your Getting Paid? Who the Hell is Getting Paid.

January 30, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Yeah, he wishes.

Republican Colorado Senator Cory Gardner has been getting a mess of phone calls.

Gardner said his office is getting so many calls and emails, his has staff assigned to do nothing except respond to them. In one night, his office received 3,000 voicemails. Many of them were from what Gardner calls paid protesters from other parts of the U.S.

Paid protestors?  Yeah, whistle past that graveyard, Buddy.

I guess he meant to say “pissed off protestor” and it just came out “paid protestors.”

To their credit, the Denver teevee station adds this —

Editor’s Note: CBS4 has asked Sen. Cory Gardner’s office for evidence of out-of-state paid protesters calling the office, and CBS4 plans to follow up on the story this week.

Bless Cory’s heart, Hillary carried Colorado.  So, you know, you might give him a call.  His Denver office number is (303) 391-5777.  You might let him know you’re not being paid.